Gene R. Cook - Raising Up a Family to the Lord

1993 Deseret Book Company. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without permission in writing from the publisher, Deseret Book Company, P.O. Box 30178, Salt Lake City, Utah 84130. This work is not an official publication of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The views expressed herein are the responsibility of the author and do not necessarily represent the position of the Church or of Deseret Book Company. Deseret Book is a registered trademark of Deseret Book Company.

Preface

Children of the Noble Birthright

When we consider what it means to raise up a family to the Lord, we must ask ourselves a few questions: Who is this generation that we are attempting to raise up to the Lord? Are they really the children of the noble birthright? What part will they play in this final dispensation of time? Let me illustrate in part the answer to those questions with something that happened in our family a few years ago.

One of our older sons was working in a cemetery, and my younger sons and I used to go there in the evening and scare him. That was probably not the thing to do, but we all enjoyed it, including the son who worked there. Once when we were kidding about it at supper, I told him, "Son, if you have any spare time up there, why don't you dig a big hole for your father. It ought to be about six and a half feet long and six feet deep. You may as well get it ready." One of my other boys said, "Yeah, do one for me, too. When the day comes for me to be called home, I'll be ready." We all laughed about it.

However, another son very seriously said, "Well, you won't need one for me."

"Why not?" we asked.

"Because I'm not going to die."

We all laughed and said, "Surely you're going to die. Everybody's going to die. Nobody escapes death."

He said, "Well, I'm not planning on it."

I could tell he meant what he had said, so I pursued it further. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"After hearing about my friend's patriarchal blessing and some other things, I hope I'll be here when the Savior comes," he replied. "I hope I'll be caught up and changed in the twinkling of an eye, so I won't need some cemetery plot."

We could see he was very serious about the idea, and who were we to say otherwise? Perhaps what he said will come to pass. It was a serious thought that reminded me of the inspired question, "Who is this generation we are raising up to the Lord?"

My wife and I were somewhat sobered some days later to see our six-year-old son come home with a T-shirt they'd given him at school. Across the front of this beautiful green shirt were the words The Class of 2000. We were quite taken aback to think that one of our own would be graduating in that year. Of course, no one knows when the Lord will come but our Father in heaven. But certainly the time is drawing closer. It may well be that this generation we are attempting to raise up to the Lord will be the generation to meet him when he comes. At any rate, we must give our best effort to prepare this generation to receive him, either in this life or the next.

Acknowledgments

What a blessing to have been raised in a good family with parents, brothers, and a sister who taught me much about wholesome family life! I am also profoundly indebted to my own good wife and children for having patience with me as their husband and father in allowing me to learn while serving my own family. Most of what we have learned about raising up families to the Lord has surely come from the Lord through these wonderful spirits whom he has entrusted to our care.

Particular appreciation is expressed to my wife and children who helped organize the scriptures, stories, and other material in this book, and who also helped edit the manuscript. My daughter-in-law Ashlee Ethington Cook supplied the illustrations, for which I am grateful. I would like to thank Kristine Buchanan, Deon Saunders, Rebecca Day, and Christa Whitaker, who did much of the typing and editing of the manuscript. Thanks also goes to Jack M. Lyon, managing editor of Deseret Book Company, who edited the manuscript and greatly assisted in its compilation.

May I especially express my deepest gratitude to the Lord for his guidance in assisting us in our attempts to raise up a family to him and for the direct inspiration that has come in compiling this book.

Lastly, may I say that this book is not in any way an official publication of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and any shortcomings, omissions, or deficiencies are clearly mine. May the Lord bless all who read this material to better raise up their families to the Lord.

Introduction

Raising Up a Family to the Lord

A couple of years ago while on a plane to a stake conference, I sat by a couple in their sixties, both of whom were faithful members of the Church. After we had discussed the gospel a little, the woman began to pour out her heart to me about her six children. She felt that she and her husband had been fairly successful with four of them, but two had turned completely away from the Church, rebelling at everything that was good.

Through her tears she said, "What did we do wrong? They went through the Young Men and Young Women programs, through Boy Scouts, through all the activities the Church provided. We made sure they were active in the Church, believing that would keep them on the right track.

"We also believed that if we fulfilled all of our Church callings, which we did, our children would be blessed and protected. Now we're confusedwe don't know what we could have done differently."

This good woman nearly begged me to explain to her and her husband what they had done wrong or to tell them if they had misplaced their faith in the "systems" of the Church. She was brokenhearted and desperate for an answer. She also expressed great concern about the upcoming generation and what she should do to influence her active children and grandchildren. All in all, it was a touching, heartbreaking discussion with her and her husband.

As I listened to this good couple, I lamented with them about what had happened to their family. My heart was drawn out in sympathy, and I wanted somehow to help them. I've thought many times since that day about some of the hard questions they asked. For example, "If you do your duty, will the Lord take care of your family?" "If you fulfill your callings faithfully, to what degree will the Lord help with your family and 'take up the slack'?" "What influence can we have on our children and grandchildren when they're not living daily under our tutelage in our own home?"

Is it natural that some children are just going to rebel? After all, a third of the hosts of heaven did. Also, some of Adam's children and some of Lehi's did. Are there things we can do to ensure, to some degree, that none of our children will be lost and that none will rebel? Why do things seem to go fairly smoothly in some families while others seem to have all kinds of difficulties? Why is it that in some families some of the children have turned out all right and others, at least so far, have not? Why do children rebel? Are children, in the beginning, all good and holy and wholesome? Does responsibility for their rebellion rest with the parents, with the children, or with both?

The prophets have given some specific hope and counsel about such questions as came from this good couple. Elder Boyd K. Packer has said, "It is a great challenge to raise a family in the darkening mists of our moral environment" ("Our Moral Environment,"