Deanna Davis Ph.D. - Laugh, Cry, Eat Some Pie: A Down-to-Earth Recipe for Living Mindfully (Even When the World Feels Half-Baked)

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Table of Contents

For my sisters, Kristie, Michelle, Alicia, and Verlieyou have always been (and always will be) my favorite people to laugh with, my safest people to cry with, and my most beloved fellow pie-indulgers.

And in memory of both Gary Holum and Renee Klosterman Power. Dad, thank you for teaching me how to savor both pie and life... what a gift you gave me! And Renee, your life was an unrivaled example of mindfulness and warmth... thank you, my friend.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Here we go! A heartfelt thank-you to all of my audience members from the Womanhood: The Divine Comedy show, whose laughter and feedback helped refine these stories and the messages they carry. To all of the nonprofit organizations I have partnered with to bring this show to your communities and causesthe work you do is extraordinarily important and it has been a privilege to work with all of you! Special thanks to Transitions of Spokane for being the first organization to work with us, and to RiteCare Spokane for taking the concept to a whole new level.

Thank you, too, to my readers, clients, and event attendeesyour desire to live life by design rather than by default consistently challenges me to learn more to better serve you.

Marian Lizzi, editor of my dreams, and Cathy Hemming, ever-faithful agent, you both rock my world! And to the wonderful team at Perigee, you make publishing not only possible but a real pleasure.

For your unconditional love and tireless support, which I never had to ask for, but which you always offered in the form of child care, emotional support, foodstuffs and beverages of various sorts, and practical contributions of all kinds to my life and business, I want to thank: Kristie, Dan, Brianna, Michelle, Mike, Jacob, Alicia, Blake, Verlie, Amber, Rhiannon, Chad, Malina, Carsten, Connie, Kay, Debbie, Kari, Susan, Lisa, Sara, Katie, Nicolle, Sue, Di, Rita, Dianah T., Mark and Jim, Phyllis and Don, GG, and Karen. And to the Millers, the Klingbacks, and the Ehlertsthe world would be a better place if there were more friends and neighbors like you!

Julie Peterson, you and Renee shaped my life in more ways than you will ever know. Thank you both for supporting my personal growth and professional journey, for encouraging me every step of the way, and for your friendship. We all should be so lucky to have people like you stewarding our talents to serve the world.

Bob Maurer and Mary Anne Radmacher, you continue to enrich my journey as a writer and speaker, and I am honored to call you both mentors and friends. Brett Enlow, thank you for our many spirited conversations on mindfulness and what it really means.

Sally Pfeifer, you sparked my writing career during a chance conversation one day, and Peggy Herbert, you showed me the power of positive interactions to change people and the world. You are both examples of the transformative nature of education and the caring nature of human beings.

Michael, through all of it... and thats a lot... you are still my best friend and biggest fan. With you, every laugh is more luxurious, every tear is easier to bear, and every slice of pie tastes sweeter. I love you.

CHAPTER 1

Why Pie

From Vice to Virtue

I didnt realize until tonight that I had chosen my career in large part so that I could not only indulge in and validate my many vices but also be compensated for sharing those vices and their requisite consequences with scores of people worldwide. This revelation happened when I sat down to write a blog post about my progress on the manuscript for the book you now hold in your hands. While introducing the title, since it deals with pie, something moved me to check the previous weeks blog posts to make sure I wasnt fixating too heavily on one particular topic (such as foodstuffs, for instance). Yes, its true that I have to run this little checks and balances system because I do, indeed, fixate too heavily on particular topics on a regular basis, which usually end up being related to one or more of my vicesmost of which are food and beverage related.

So I scanned through those posts to find that I had begun the week by writing an exceptionally long piece (in blog years, where each paragraph equates to seven paragraphs due to our societys hopelessly short, Twitter-fied attention span) on The Cheese-Free Me. This was an extended (but thankfully humorous) account of my decision to give up all dairy products on the recommendation of my chiropractor in an effort to reduce the inflammation related to my recent back injury. The piece detailed the trauma I experienced making the decision to go cheese-free, and the subsequent expressions of both shock and horror it elicited from those who learned of my self-imposed fast. (It still seems, as I mentioned in Living with Intention, that cheese is one of the great unifiers of humankind.) I reviewed the next post, which described my latest chocolate escapades, followed by the post introducing this very book, which extols the life-affirming aspects of pie.

When I realized that at least half of that weeks posts had not only referenced but actually centered on the topic of food, I had to make the editorial decision to postpone publishing my planned piece titled, Fondue Haiku, in the event that my food fixation would undermine my credibility as a Positive Psychology and success expert (as if it hadnt already). Then I recalled the fact that, despite my expertise in the field, several advanced degrees, and my publishing credits, the only (and I mean only) element of my professional bio people recall after I give a keynote speech is that I support the addition of chocolate as a key component of the USDA Food Pyramid.

So, after thinking about it for a while, I realized that I am, undeniably, blessed to be compensated for describing in detail the self-help strategies associated with my many vices. In my defense, I do my very best to frame aspects of those vices as virtues, since there are so many powerful lessons to be learned from the perfect slice of pie or a great pinot noir or a massive brick of creamy cheese. As such, Ive informed my editor and wanted to let all of my readers know that from here on you can expect not only blog posts but also an entire book series on my various propensities for foods and beverages of various types. Yes, Ill share future musings on martinis, tomes on treats, paperbacks on pasta, writings on wine, and chapters on cookies. But for the purposes of this book, Ill narrow my focus to the strikingly significant benefits of pie.

The Late, Great Cake or Pie? Debate

There are cake people and there are pie people. Im convinced that were born with an innate preference for one or the other strategically embedded in our DNA to spur heated disputes about the correct dessert choice for Sunday dinners, summer barbecues, and family reunions. I also believe that this genetic programming extends far beyond the late, great cake or pie? debate to other questions of culinary choice such as coffee or tea, milk or dark chocolate, white or red wine, cookies or bars, vodka or gin, and cheese or, well, anything healthier (or less satisfying). These pairs at times unite us and at times polarize us. So just to get the whole unity/polarity thing off to a rip-roaring start, let me begin this book by stating that I am an unabashed and unapologetic coffee-drinking, dark chocolate-snacking, red wine-sipping, cookie-eating, vodka-swilling, cheese-nibbling

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