M. Tamra Chandler - Feedback (and Other Dirty Words): Why We Fear It, How to Fix It

Praise for Feedback (and Other Dirty Words)

Feedback can be tough to give (and receive!) but is so core to how we drive performance and improve as humans. This book offers practical frameworks and tools to consider as you leverage feedback to build relationships and improve results!

Jesse Schlueter, Vice President of Learning and Leadership, Nordstrom

An enjoyable and compelling read, this book shows leaders how to set the tone for the growth mindset to flourish. Packed with tips, it shows readers an easier path to hearing how they are doing, sharing what they see in others, and inspiring everyone to thrive.

Elizabeth Hall, Vice President, Employee Experience, Cambia Health Solutions

The way we work is changing. The traditional top-down hierarchal approach to management has been replaced by a collaborative work environment where employees thrive on real-time, continuous feedback from managers. In Feedback (and Other Dirty Words), Chandler and Grealish offer business leaders an informative and easy-to-follow guide for transforming their work culture into one where employees no longer fear feedback but flourish with it.

Derek Irvine, Senior Vice President, Client Strategy and Consulting, Workhuman

Like it or probably not, people dont grow without feedback. Can you deliver feedback without closing people down? Chandler and Grealish give the tools and methods for making feedback feel good. Not only will Feedback (and Other Dirty Words) help you with your next performance conversation, it can transform your company culture to be more agile and enjoyable.

Marcia Reynolds, PsyD, Past President, International Coach Federation, and author of The Discomfort Zone

This quick read highlights real benefits that can follow strong feedback practices while simultaneously helping to remove the stigma associated with giving and receiving feedbackimportant topics for leaders.

Roy Bivens, author of Experiencing Improvement; Managing Partner, Orion Advisory; and CEO, Diamond Orthopedic

What do successful leaders and organizations have in common? A culture where feedback is welcomed and not feared and trust sits at the center. Feedback (and other Dirty Words) shows you how to get there. Both witty and enlightening! Read this... youll be entertained as much as you are informed.

Christopher J. Cowan, MEd, FABC, Senior Vice President, Human Resources, Christiana Care Health System

At last! A concise, practical, actionable contribution to the sticky topic of feedback. In this breakthrough book, M. Tamra Chandler and Laura Grealish offer layers of useful information and support for changing our existing paradigms about feedback. This book details simple and powerful methods, backed by science, and everyday examples that the reader can relate to. The authors wealth of experience shows up in this compelling and digestible tool box.

Beatrice W. Hansen, MSSW, PCC, Principal, Presence-Based Coaching

This very useful book teaches us that feedback is the key to all activities where we interact with others, especially at work. The lessons here show us how to do it simply and well.

Peter Cappelli, George W. Taylor Professor of Management and Director, Center for Human Resources, The Wharton School, and Professor of Education, University of Pennsylvania

There is no leadership practice more effective than well done feedback to drive high performance through people. It is the equivalent of a leader superpower. Yet very few have mastered it. How could this power shortage be so severe and stubbornly stuck? What will it take to fix it? Read this clever and awesomely helpful book that digs deep to find the science and reasons behind this power failure, to fully appreciate the proven impact of good feedback, and, importantly, to find many useful and practical strategies and tactics for making your own feedback power super.

Jeannie Coyle, former Senior Vice President of Human Resources, American Express, and coauthor of Make Talent Your Business

Thoughtful feedback is both a gift and a critical data point along anyones journey to their own integrityand the integrity of any organization. If you want to unleash a powerful and priceless resource, immerse yourself in this book and all that it teaches.

Luke Timmins, Head of Engineering, Bungie

FEEDBACK

(and Other Dirty Words)

OTHER BOOKS BY M. TAMRA CHANDLER

How Performance Management Is Killing Performanceand What to Do about It

(and Other Dirty Words)

Why We Fear It, How to Fix It

M. TAMRA CHANDLER
with LAURA DOWLING GREALISH

Feedback (and Other Dirty Words)

Copyright 2019 by M. Tamra Chandler
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed Attention: Permissions Coordinator, at the address below.

Ordering information for print editions

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First Edition

Paperback print edition ISBN 978-1-5230-8522-4
PDF e-book ISBN 978-1-5230-8523-1
IDPF e-book ISBN 978-1-5230-8524-8
Digital audio ISBN 978-1-5230-8526-2

2019-1

Set in A Caslon Pro by Westchester Publishing Services. Text designer: Jordan Wannemacher. Cover designer: Logan Grealish. Illustrations: Ivy Mosier and Logan Grealish.

For Martha Marie Chandler,
who never hesitated to share frequent and focused feedback.
Mom, you are greatly missed.

IF YOU ASK MEMBERS of any group of peoplemultinational corporations, sports teams, mom and pop businesses, rock bands, nonprofit boards, knitting clubs, you name ittheyre likely to admit that their organization pretty much sucks at feedback. Sure, Ive met a few individuals who feel like they navigate the hazardous waters of feedback well, but at an organizational level were all pretty much adrift.