Joe Navarro - Louder Than Words: Take Your Career from Average to Exceptional with the Hidden Power of Nonverbal Intelligence

IMAGINE KNOWING what others are thinking, feeling, or intending. Imagine being able to powerfully persuade and influence others. Imagine identifying, without being told, points of concern and contention. Imagine being able to enhance how others perceive you, conveying confidence, authority, and empathy.

What were really talking about here is the capacity to truly understand people. In business, when confidence, empathy, and the ability to know what others are thinking are combined, you gain a superlative edge.

Fortunately, we are all innately equipped with extraordinary yet seldom used powers of discernment and influence, as well as the potential to achieve great things. This book will reveal how to tap this elemental aptitude that is available to everyone, but employed by few: the silent yet forceful power of nonverbal intelligence .

The world is constantly communicating nonverbally. Our body movements, our facial expressions, how we speak, how we show our emotions, how we dress, the possessions we favor, our conscious and unconscious behaviors and attitudeseven our environmentsare all communicating nonverbally.

Nonverbal intelligence allows us to interpret and employ this universal language with fluency and intent. To use a twenty-first-century analogy, nonverbal intelligence is like a computer program: it has tremendous capacity, yet most of us use only a few of its applications, not realizing there are many other valuable features that can assist us in communicating more effectively and in achieving our goals. In addition, like any software, nonverbal intelligence needs to be activated, implemented, upgraded occasionally, and refined with use. In this book, Ill show you how to access the full depth and power of nonverbals to enhance your business skills as well as your personal life.

THE NONVERBALS OF SUCCESS

Weve all encountered unproductive, frustrating, or infuriating business situations. We know how they make us feel. Whats less obvious is the degree to which poor nonverbals contributed to the problem: the way a handshake is given or received, how a new client is greeted, the speed of a persons speech, an arrogant demeanor, even the navigability of a companys Web site. In this book, youll learn how thin slice assessments of nonverbalsvery rapid assessments or impressionscan support or undermine your business efforts. Youll also learn how to use these assessments to glean extremely accurate information about others: how cooperative people will be, how intolerant or flexible they are, and whether they deserve your attention.

Youll learn how to use nonverbals to establish yourself in an organization and place yourself in the lineup for the next promotion. Every day, we have opportunities to score positive or negative points. You will be able to read clients, colleagues, and bosses, and discern when times are good and when trouble is brewing. Youll discover how to use nonverbals to lead others and create an environment of success that attracts the best and the brightest. Youll master the secrets of managing peoples perceptions of you to ensure continued success in your present job and when you transition to another enterprise. You will even learn the nonverbals of how organizations are perceived, and how to send the right messages to the public.

HOW I LEARNED ABOUT NONVERBALS

My awareness of nonverbals began in childhood, when my family arrived in the United States from Cuba. I was eight years old and knew no English. I was plunged into daily life, attending school, trying to make friends, trying to figure things out in a new country. The only way I could comprehend my world was to watch peoples faces and bodies for clues about what they were thinking or feeling.

My survival response turned into a lifelong study and a professional calling. I learned in the FBI to quickly and assuredly assess the meaning of human behavior so that appropriate actionat times, lifesaving actioncould be taken. Moreover, my assessment needed to be scientifically based so that it could stand up to judicial scrutiny. This is what I want to teach you.

THE TRUE SCOPE OF NONVERBALS

Nonverbals are much more than the stereotypical crossed arms means youre tense; looking to the left means youre lying. As youll discover, not only are both examples incorrect, but they also reflect a limited view of the scope of nonverbals.

In every area of life, from childhood to dating to business, were bombarded by images, emblems, symbols, acts, and behaviors that transmit ideas, thoughts, messages, and emotions nonverbally. We also use these tactics to draw attention to ourselves, to highlight what we feel is important, to magnify the impact of our words, and to express what words cannot.

Even verbal communication has a nonverbal component: the tone, manner, cadence, volume, and duration of speech are just as important as what is said, as are the nonverbals of pauses and silence.

In business, the setting where a meeting or a speech takes place, the curbside appeal of a buildingits architecture, artwork, ornaments, and lightingare all part of the nonverbal communication process. Colors, too, enter into nonverbal communications, as do seemingly insignificant particulars such as the location of the receptionists desk, and whether a security guard sits or stands. All of these communicate something to the public.

On a personal level, we know that our movements, our facial expressions, and our clothes send messages about us, but we also send powerful nonverbal signals by how were groomed, whether we have body piercings or tattoos, and how (and even where) we stand, sit, and lean. All of these determine how were perceived and what we communicate to others about our feelings, thoughts, and intentions.

Even a detail as simple as carrying a backpack instead of a briefcase may speak volumes, in the same way that the look of our business cards communicates something about us.

The colors we choose for PowerPoint presentations; the speed and appearance of our Web site; the (official or unofficial) company dress code and whether you have casual Fridays whether you wear a lapel pin; what your desk looks like; even what time you arrive each dayall of these nonverbals are constantly communicating about you and your business.

Intangible qualities such as your attitude, preparation, humility, presence, and managerial style are also nonverbals. They have profound impact, particularly if you are in a leadership position.

You need only look at leaders of industry and politics to see the mastery of nonverbal communication. When we praise their confidence, charisma, empathy, vision, and leadership, were often talking about nonverbals. Our best businesses, too, get the nonverbals right: when we talk about image, branding, halo effect, stickiness, traction, service, responsiveness, and influence, we are often talking about nonverbals.

TRANSFORMING THE AVERAGE INTO THE EXCEPTIONAL

I have observed, studied, and learnedwith continued awethe power of nonverbals to convey quintessential truths about ourselves. I have witnessed situations in which good people were undermined because they missed nonverbal signals that would have ensured their success, well-being, or safety. In my job as an FBI agent and as a supervisor, a large actor in small events, and a very small actor in large events, I saw many such dramas of life and death, behaviors that acquitted or incarcerated, and actions that led to failure or to extraordinary success. Undertaking this study not in a lab, not in an experiment, but in the high-stakes arena of real life allowed me to analyze and catalogue human behavior engaged for good and for evil, for failure and for success, for mediocrity and for greatness.

Upon my retirement from the FBI, I found myself amazed anew by the ubiquitous presence of nonverbals and by their paradoxes. Nonverbals are hidden in plain sight. They magnify our words and deeds in ways that are incalculable, yet almost indefinable. They are universal to humankind, yet their influence is rarely noticed. They are understood by all, yet actively practiced by a very few of the most successful among us. They achieve tangible victories through intangible means. They are as subtle as the flicker of an eyelid, but they can transform relationships, for nonverbals speak louder than words.