2012 by Jay Pathak and David Runyon
Published by Baker Books
a division of Baker Publishing Group
P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287
www.bakerbooks.com
Ebook edition created 2012
Ebook corrections 01.13.2015, 07.16.2015, 06.02.2016
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meansfor example, electronic, photocopy, recordingwithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.
ISBN 978-1-4412-3847-4
Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com
All the stories in this book are true, but the names have been changed to protect the privacy of our neighbors.
The internet addresses, email addresses, and phone numbers in this book are accurate at the time of publication. They are provided as a resource. Baker Publishing Group does not endorse them or vouch for their content or permanence.
Published in association with the literary agency of WordServe Literary Group, Ltd., www.wordserveliterary.com.
Building relationships with our neighbors leads to better communities, better cities, and ultimately... a better world. Dave and Jay have written a powerful primer on neighboring. I encourage you to read this book and to step outside your front door and start making a difference.
Ken Blanchard, co-author of The One Minute Manager and Lead Like Jesus
The Art of Neighboring is a tool that is helping government and faith-based leaders work together to serve their communities. That by itself would be enough to recommend it. But it does more. It encourages people of faith to live as Jesus intended.
Reggie McNeal, missional leadership specialist for Leadership Network
The Great Commandment of Jesus is not optional. Jay and Dave hold readers accountable to live out the Great Commandment in literal and creative ways. The Art of Neighboring is a unique and necessary addition to any serious Christians missional library.
Ed Stetzer, president of LifeWay Research and author of Subversive Kingdom
The Art of Neighboring is at the forefront of a national movement to renew local communities. This book explains why neighboring really matters and reminds us all of the value of pursuing relationships with the people who live around us.
John McKnight, co-director of the Asset-Based Community Development Institute, Northwestern University
Jay Pathak and Dave Runyon provide thought-provoking yet practical insights on what it means to love your neighbor. The truths in the book have the potential to transform not only your life but also your entire community. This is a book you cant afford to miss.
Margaret Feinberg, author of Scouting the Divine and The Sacred Echo
I live in the same city as Dave and Jay, and I can tell you that they are the real deal. If you are tired of living at a hectic pace and just skimming the surface of life... then stop everything youre doing and take the art of neighboring as seriously as Jesus did. This story is the essence of Christianity and has the potential to change everything!
Hugh Halter, author of The Tangible Kingdom and Sacrilege
If you dare follow Jay and Dave into this great adventure of neighboring, your lives and your neighborhoods will never be the same.
Carl Medearis, author of Speaking of Jesus
The act of loving our actual neighbors is one of the simplest and yet most powerful things that we can do to make an impact in our world. I have seen the model described in this book close up, and it is the real deal. If you care about your city, if you long to see the fabric of your community change for the better, then you need to read this book.
Eric Swanson, co-author of To Transform a City
Ive always wondered how the churches in our city could work together to impact our community in a significant way. The Art of Neighboring has united many of the churches in Duluth and has helped us to launch a neighboring movement. Im excited about the influence that The Art of Neighboring is having in our city and its potential to impact other cities around the country.
Don Ness, mayor of Duluth, MN
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Copyright Page
Endorsements
Dedication
Foreword by Randy Frazee
Acknowledgments
1. Who Is My Neighbor?
2. Taking the Great Commandment Seriously
3. The Time Barrier
4. The Fear Factor
5. Moving Down the Line
6. Baby Steps
7. Motives Matter
8. The Art of Receiving
9. The Art of Setting Boundaries
10. The Art of Focusing
11. The Art of Forgiving
12. Better Together
Study Guide
Notes
Recommended Resources
About the Authors
Back Ad
Back Cover
Foreword
Living in Community
O ne of my favorite shows is HGTVs House Hunters . Its a reality show that follows people who are searching for a place to live. If you watch the show, you will notice that when looking for a new home, almost everyone focuses on whats on the inside and outside of the house itself. Does the kitchen have granite countertops? Is there a finished basement? Does the front of the house have good curb appeal? Is the house located in a solid school district?
But one question I have never heard asked is, Who are the neighbors?
This is surprising to me because the individuals we live next to have a big impact on the quality of our lives. In the grand scheme of things, relationships are much more important than bricks and mortar, and our neighborhoods are much more than collections of houses.
Our family has lived in five neighborhoods over the last thirty years. Shortly after our third move, God opened my eyes to the value of neighboring. As a result, my wife and I felt God calling us to make it a priority to get to know the people who lived around us. This has been a life-changing decision for our entire family.
As we began to reach out to our neighbors, we quickly discovered that the benefits were far-reaching. We ended up being cared for by our neighbors as much as, if not more than, we cared for them. We began to experience what its like to have a strong support system right outside our front door. We all have a need for genuine community, and nothing beats the frequency, availability, and spontaneity of connecting deeply with others who live nearby.
I also learned that the story of Jesus becomes evident whenever we connect with the people who live closest to us. Jesus said, Everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another (John 13:35). The practice of neighboring creates incredible opportunities for us as believers to connect our story to the stories of our neighbors and to Gods story.
We lived in that neighborhood for seven years before God called us to our next adventure. Our house didnt have granite countertops or stainless steel appliances. However, it became our dream home because of the relationships that we developed with our neighbors. Our street was filled with people who knew and cared for one another. As I learned to make time to be intentional in my neighborhood, I began to live at a healthier pace.
I first heard about the Denver Neighboring movement a few years ago through a close friend of mine. He shared a story about a group of pastors who had been challenged to launch a neighboring movement by their local government leaders. As I learned more about their story, I became intrigued and excited about what God was doing in their midst. I have always felt that if local congregations could work together on this issue, then great things were bound to happen. Adding civic leaders to the mix is icing on the cake. This is the type of movement that has the potential to change individuals, neighborhoods, and even entire cities.