Angelique Pinet - The Negotiation Phrase Book: The Words You Should Say to Get What You Want

Believe it or not, youve been negotiating all your life. Remember those days of trading baseball cards with friends and exchanging Moms turkey sandwich for a more delectable snack? Though you probably didnt realize it at the time, you were practicing the art of negotiation. Negotiating as an adult can feel more complicated and intimidating, and there is often more at stake than a few baseball cards or a lunchtime treat. But adapting those skills you developed early on is a worthy pursuit that will serve you well throughout your life. And now, thanks to the ever-increasing speed in which we communicate in both our social and professional lives, negotiation is more important than ever.

How many times have you felt like you should have gotten a better deal on something but didnt know how to do it? How many times have you had the feeling that you paid too much for something because you had no other choice? If youre like most people, youve been there and done that more than youd like to admit.

If you cringe at the very thought of having to negotiate, you are not alone. You probably envision long hours of haggling with an unpleasant salesperson and getting nowhere in the process or getting stuck on a seemingly endless exchange of e-mails, only to find you havent made progress until your sixth reply. True, negotiating can be exhausting at times, but for the most part it isnt as dreadful as you might think.

In fact, you negotiate all the time successfully! From accepting a job offer to participating in work-related meetings to hashing out the details of a childs curfew, youve been putting your skills to the test all along. As a consumer, you negotiate your budget on a regular basis to determine what you want versus what you can afford. As a homeowner, you negotiate with many people, like pest exterminators and landscapers. As a spouse, you negotiate sharing household responsibilities and tasks.

Practicing the art of negotiating teaches you how to present your case to others in a way that helps them understand your side of things. You learn how to gain a good amount of control in situations instead of leaving yourself vulnerable. More importantly, you learn that its okay to ask for the things you want. If youre going to spend a large amount of money on somethinga laptop computer, for exampleits not out of line to ask the salesperson to throw a carrying case in with the deal. At worst, shell say no. At best, youll be walking out of the store with the computer you wanted and a bag to carry it home in.

Like any game, once you learn the fundamental skills required to play and figure out what youre up against, you can relax and have fun. One of the basic skills of negotiating is learning how to study your opponent. Figuring out how to read body language and facial expressions is a skill you can use anywhere. After all, we interact with people every day, and its a lot easier to do that when we can understand how they communicate and what they are trying to say. The tips in this book will help you fend off the forceful salesperson and hold your own against a pushy coworker. Youll also gain insight into your own character so you can find your weakest spots and guard against them.

Not only will this book take you through a variety of possible negotiation scenarios, it will also give you the language you need to get the job done. Look for the key negotiation words and phrases (set in bold type and listed at the end of each chapter) that you can keep in the back of your mind and use when negotiating. As youll learn, what you say and when you say it, as well as the language used in e-mails and contracts, is of utmost importance when negotiating.

As you begin your journey, forget everything you thought you knew about negotiating, and open your mind to all the wonderful things the process has to offer. Once you have a look around, youll realize how gratifying it is to possess the skills necessary for success. Let this book be your guide into that fascinating world, and discover the many ways you can apply what youve learned to the various facets of your life.