Susan Senator - The Autism Moms Survival Guide (for Dads, too!): Creating a Balanced and Happy Life While Raising a Child with Autism

4 stars out of 5. Reflects the true experience of autism parents, bravely presenting the painful controversies and issues that crop up when the medical and educational communities fail to provide the support or information needed to make good decisions. Senators prose is intense, sometimes anguished, with occasional glimpses of poetry. A satisfying book... the stuff of truly gripping memoir.

About.com

Exceptional. Reading this was like Senator was holding my hand, leading me through the process, coaching me. She deftly and graciously addresses the issues of depression, and coping with judgment and criticism. Senator offers concrete advice for gaining perspective and choosing therapies for our children.

TeenAutism.com

Senators message of a balanced life is valid and empowering at any point in a familys journey with ASD. A great read.

Library Journal

This book is undoubtedly one of the best Ive read on raising a child with autism. The author has an authentic way of inviting the reader to look at all sides of an issue and gain a broader perspective of what it means to live in a family affected by autism, without ever sounding too clinical, preachy, or victimized. Senators believable writing style, personal experience, and ability to blend the different viewpoints of other parents makes The Autism Moms Survival Guide as real as it gets.

Exceptional Parent

Did you know that autism parents can choose an identity other than Avenging Warrior or Martyr? That it is reasonable to aim for happy lives for us and for our children, despite our kids challenges? If this is news to you, then you need to read The Autism Moms Survival Guide (For Dads, Too!) ASAP.

BlogHer.com

The Autism Moms Survival Guide is unique among books about autism in that it is not primarily about how to parent an autistic child. Instead, it is written for the challenged parents themselves, understanding them to be individuals who need to find fun, happiness, validation, and fulfillment now, in the midst of struggle and hardship, in order to be healthy and whole.

Special Needs Project

Autism parents should keep this book close by for comfort and reassurance. Professionals will get a glimpse into the daily struggles facing the families that come through their offices. Susan has done us all a real service.

Eileen Costello, MD, coauthor of Quirky Kids

This brilliant book offers a wealth of insights and advice on finding personal happiness and contentment while parenting a child with autism.

Tim Shriver, CEO of Special Olympics

A life-line. Senator spoke my language, said the things I was afraid to say or even admit to myself.

Lahnaya, autism blogger

Every parent of a child with autism should read this book. Its honest and hopeful in equal measure, a rare feat in the world of special needs.

Claire LaZebnik, coauthor of Overcoming Autism

Senator knows well and writes eloquently about the real journeyboth the sorrow and the joyof being the mother of a boy with autism.

Karl Taro Greenfield, author of Boy Alone: A Brothers Memoir

Susan provides a crisp and practical road map for parents along with links to organizations that provide services and resources. I love the upbeat tone of the book. A great addition to the autism parents bookshelf.

Laura Shumaker, author of A Regular Guy: Growing Up with Autism

ABOUT THE BOOK

Given the daily challenges of raising a child with autism, its easy for parents to lose themselves and for their overall quality of life to plummet. Susan Senator interweaves the voices of autism parents, researchers, and professionals to offer guidance and encouragement on how to find happiness and fulfillment in the midst of the struggles of raising an autistic child. Topics include: how to handle feelings of despair and hopelessness; finding fun, even during turbulent times; caring for your marriage; and finding a balance between accepting your child as he or she is and seeking new treatments.

To learn more about the author, visit her website at susansenator.com.

SUSAN SENATOR is the mother of three boys, the oldest of whom has autism. She is the author of Making Peace with Autism, a memoir of her familys struggles and triumphs. Her writing on autism has appeared in the New York Times, the Washington Post, and the Boston Globe. She has been featured on the Today show, CNN, MSNBC, Voice of America, and NPR.

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Trumpeter Books

An imprint of Shambhala Publications, Inc.

Horticultural Hall

300 Massachusetts Avenue

Boston, Massachusetts 02115

trumpeterbooks.com

2010 by Susan Senator

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Senator, Susan.

The autism moms survival guide (for dads, too!): creating a balanced and happy life while raising a child with autism / Susan Senator.

p. cm.

Includes index.

eISBN 978-0-8348-2171-2

ISBN 978-1-59030-753-3

1. Parents of autistic children. 2. Autistic childrenCare. I. Title.

RJ506.A9.S456 2010

649.154dc22

2009034557

This book is dedicated to all autism families, especially to those who so graciously invited me into their homes and lives. I loved meeting all of you and listening to your stories, your wonderful voices, and meeting your kids. All of you helped me make sense of the autism parenting experience, and showed me a thing or two about what is important in life.

Preface

IS BEING AN AUTISM PARENT fundamentally different from parenting other types of children? Its hard to say. Most parents go through challenges with their children and grapple with uncertainty about their kids development and how best to help them through their struggles. But we do know that autism parents perceive themselves to be up against more than most parents, and that perception itself is tremendously significant because it can make raising a child with autism feel unnecessarily terrible and hopeless.

Having a child on the autism spectrum can bring many hardships, no question. But in terms of the parenting experience, how much of the strugglehow much of the grief, depression, and despairis caused by our childrens actual impairments, and how much is due to our own level of misinformation and confusion, the lack of adequate help and support, the cultural stigma surrounding autism, and the resulting inability to nurture ourselves adequately?

My son Nat was diagnosed with autism at age three, and his disabilities are relatively severe. However, over my twenty years as Nats mother, I have come to believe that its not the autism itself that has caused us the most suffering but our perceptions of it, our mental and emotional baggage surrounding autism, that has had the biggest negative impact on our lives. Following the publication of my first book, Making Peace with Autism, I gave talks around the United States, and I learned that many autism parents have come to the same conclusion: the perception, confusion, and ignorance surrounding autism are equal to, if not more problematic than, autism itself.