Chantal Sicile-Kira - Autism Life Skills: 10 Essential Abilities Your Child With Autism Needs to Learn

CONTENTS

For Maman and Papa

As a parent its easy to feel overwhelmed by the prospect of caring for a child with autism. Not only are there living adjustments to be made, it can also be hard to deal with the emotional impact.

Covering a range of issues and drawing on the experiences of people with autism, Autism Life Skills offers comprehensive advice and will help you to work through the emotions inherent to having a child who is not developing as expected, helping them move forward and gain control of their situation.

From communication and safety to self-esteem and independance, this practical guide will show you how to develop the skills your child will need to make sense of the world and live a healthy, happy life.

Chantal Sicile-Kira has been involved with Autism Spectrum Disorders for nearly 20 years, both as a professional and as a parent. She writes the Ask Chantal column for The Autism File magazine.

What is important is not what happens to us, but how we respond to what happens to us.

Jean-Paul Sartre

The unrealised potential of my dreams makes me master of my future.

Jeremy Sicile-Kira

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Published in 2009 by Vermilion, an imprint of Ebury Publishing Ebury Publishing is a Random House Group company

First published in the United States in 2008 by Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

Copyright Chantal Sicile-Kira 2008

Chantal Sicile-Kira has asserted her right to be identified as the author of this Work in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior permission of the copyright owner.

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ISBN 9780091929084

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The information in this book has been compiled by way of general guidance in relation to the specific subjects addressed, but is not a substitute and not to be relied on for medical, healthcare, pharmaceutical or other professional advice on specific circumstances and in specific locations. Please consult your GP before changing, stopping or starting any medical treatment. So far as the author is aware the information given is correct and up to date as at January 2009. Practice, laws and regulations all change, and the reader should obtain up to date professional advice on any such issues. The author and publishers disclaim, as far as the law allows, any liability arising directly or indirectly from the use, or misuse, of the information contained in this book.

Many people were instrumental in writing this book. I am most grateful to all those adults and teens on the spectrum who gave freely of their time and allowed me to pester them with questions either in person, on the phone or via email. They shared details of their lives so that parents and educators could understand more about how they could help the children of today prepare for the future. Many expressed the hope that others would not suffer through the same situations they had, and that they would have a more positive experience growing up. I am also grateful for the personal stories that parents and educators shared with me during my travels to conferences and seminars around the country. I value the trust that people have placed in me.

Thanks to James Levine and Elizabeth Fisher for all their guidance; and Julia Kellaway, my editor, for making this book more useful and understandable for the UK reader. Many thanks go to my friends Douglas Kennedy, Temple Grandin and Bernie Rimland (in spirit), who encouraged me to be a writer from the get-go, and to Cathy Mercer, of the National Autistic Society (NAS), for her pearls of wisdom.

When I needed a quiet place to write and no responsibilities to distract me, the Ranglas family, owners of the Del Mar Motel and the Poseidon Restaurant, came to my rescue, and for that I am thankful.

For their continual support to Jeremy, I am grateful to the Afternoon Angels: Dana Pulde, Mark Grichanik and Joe Medrano. Thanks to Jeremys friends Andrea and Andi for taking the time to get to know him. Thanks to Janine Dupree and Maureen Shull, instructional aides, for establishing a great rapport with Jeremy, teaching him so well and for always being there for him. Thanks to Matt, Vivian, Kristi and Jeff, the newbies, for their patience in learning how to best support Jeremy in reaching his goals.

There is one person who has made the most impact on my son these last four years, Allan Gustafson, Jeremys secondary school teacher. Allan is the person most responsible for Jeremy becoming the mature, reflective young man he is today. Allan inspired Jeremy to believe he could attain his dreams of getting his diploma, going to university and earning a living. Allan taught him also that making those dreams come true requires taking responsibility and working hard. I could never possibly thank Allan enough for all that he has given to my son. Every teenager should have such a mentor.

Others who play an important role in my sons life and have my appreciation include Phylinda Clark-Graham, case manager, and Debra Plotkins, educational consultant, both with San Diego Regional Center; and Dr Nora Baladerian, psychologist.

Thanks to Bruce Cochrane, director of Pupil Services at San Dieguito Union High School District, and Carl Fielden, learning disabilities specialist at Grossmont College; Dawn Holman, clinical director of Autism Spectrum Consultants; Chris Vinceneux, clinical director of School Options; and Brooke Demner, occupational therapist.

Thanks as well to Dana Berchman and Craig DEntrone, producers of the MTV True Life episode I Have Autism. Their portrayal of autism as experienced by three different people on the spectrum (including Jeremy) was respectful and thoughtful, and did wonders for Jeremys self-esteem during a difficult time in his life.

Many thanks to all my friends and family for their support. Extra thanks go to Veronique, Katrina, Valerie and Francine for always being there.

Finally, I am forever grateful to my husband, Daniel; my daughter, Rebecca; and my son, Jeremy, for their love, patience and understanding.

One thing I really like about this book is that Chantal Sicile-Kira has done a beautiful job of putting the voices of many people on the spectrum into one book. In my own life I have found reading other personal accounts very helpful. When I was a child, loud noises hurt like a dentists drill hitting a nerve. I was relieved to learn that other people with autism had similar problems with sensory oversensitivity. When I was little I thought other people could withstand the noise because they were stronger than me.