Becky Walsh - Intuitive Lovers

FIRST PUBLISHED BY O BOOKS, 2010

O Books is an imprint of John Hunt Publishing Ltd., The Bothy, Deershot Lodge, Park Lane, Ropley,

Hants, SO24 0BE, UK
www.o-books.net

Printed by Digital Book Print

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Winchester, UK
Washington, USA

This book has been born out of a post-coital comment, "you are too much in your clitoris". My defensive comic wit spun back with "well at least one of us is", but the wound to my ego was deep. I was a "sexpert", knowing everything needed to pleasure my partner and myself; I could play any role, spent many hours hearing about technique from Gay male friends. I was technically brilliant and emotionally retarded.

In my defense, I was a victim of my age, reading too many women's magazines on how to find the perfect handbag and lover in the same aisle of the supermarket, telling me the route to happiness was to become independent in every way. The female evolution into masculinity was in full swing. What did he mean too much into my clitoris!? But the truth was that my full attention was focused on orgasm. My consciousness had shrunk to the smallest tip of my darkest place. My consciousness needed to expand, not just into the rest of my body or my partner but also into love itself. Needless to say my defensive ego ended this short relationship and started the long journey to non-ego-based, intuitive, open love (which, by the way, leads to great sex).

My career is an interesting one to describe. I am a psychic, but I don't predict the future; I use intuition as a tool to have a deeper understanding of the clients that I counsel. By being able to look into the relevant aspects of my clients past, I see where blocks have originated from in the same way a psychotherapist would from talking to the client. I then use a form of spiritual guidance, motivation, inspiration and life coaching to move the thinking from blocks and fear to becoming loving and open. Most of my consultations are about relationships; understandably so, as a relationship is one of the most profound and at times enjoyable/painful routes to spiritual growth. Through another human sharing our life we learn who we are. In fact we become who we are.

Through many years in consultations with wonderful clients I have become increasingly aware of how ready for change we all are, to move from an ego-based, emotional exchange to a conscious open loving connection.

It feels to me that we are fed up with feeling alone and disappointed by love as if it's some force outside of ourselves that we can't control. Most of us are waiting for someone else to give us the love we want, so we feel safe to give our gift of love. For me the only way to feel safe enough to 'be the change' in a relationship that you would like to experience is to be intuitive and open to honestly listening to our partners and ourselves. Love is ever expansive when the ego doesn't put limits on it.

Relationships allow us to grow into the best of ourselves, if we allow them to. This would ultimately change the future of the world. Happy relationships = balanced children.

I dedicate this book to all the people I have shared my lovelife with. But it wouldn't be a misprint if I missed out the f and called it a love lie. I thank you for everything you taught me, and apologize for never having loved you to the best of who I can be.

Big thank you to all the people who shared their story with me for this book, you know who you are.

Also to Andrew McMillan, Kate Orr, Anna Kamau, Elouise Carden, Andrea Marcou, Buddha on a Bicycle Covent Garden, Cat Hammond,Caroline Mylon and Cindy Shearer at Ciis San Francisco.

To Louise Weston, the only woman who can still make me blush.

To James Topping, you take your time but you always deliver.

To the brave John Hunt at O Books and all the team there, thank you.

The girls in the bus at the retreat in France, great inspiration.

Front cover photo by Emilie Fjola Sandy. With thanks to Emma Reyes, Joseph Robinson and Coco de Mer. Mask design and crafted by Hoi Chi Ng for Coco de Mer.

Your task is not to seek love, but merely to seek and find all the
barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
A Course in Miracles

Sex is intuitive. We were born knowing instinctively how to do it. If we had no sex education and no discussions with our friends and family, we would still find out how to make love. Procreating the human race is in our biological make-up.

In fact there is SO much talk about sex, we are bombarded with images and cultural stereotypes. If we hadn' been told all about sex we maybe might be able to enjoy it more! When we are thinking and analyzing our partners and our own performance while making love, we lose touch with our body. Our body allows us to feel our emotions. To be in our analytical mind we lose touch with everything else and making love becomes an act of sex that you do, because it indicates you are having a successful relationship, but the closeness of that relationship, through sex, is lost.

We live in a world where we lack the personal connection in many aspects of relationship building. In our lifetime we have seen the Internet grow into the most amazing way for people to connect to each other. But also in this lifetime when people ask us for directions in the street they don' smile or say thank you. We are faced with news broadcasts of the horrible things humans can do to each other and we hide behind a screen of communication. I love the Internet and with every change that happens in the world we will adapt; my concern is that we may adapt to have a fear-based, passionless life, where we choose our sexual partners by using our heads to work out who is the best person for us and not by using our passion, our heart and our intuition.