Codi Shewan - Everyday Legacy: Lessons for Living With Purpose, Right Now

Copyright 2020 by Codi Shewan

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced,stored in a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means,without the prior written consent of the publisher or a licence from The Canadian Copyright Licensing Agency (Access Copyright). For a copyright licence, visit www.accesscopyright.ca or call toll free to 1-800-893-5777.

Cataloguing in publication information is available from Library and Archives Canada.
ISBN 978-1-989025-99-4 (paperback)
ISBN 978-1-989603-00-0 (ebook)

Page Two
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Cover design by Peter Cocking and Jennifer Lum
Cover image by H. Armstrong Roberts/ClassicStock, via Getty Images
Interior design by Jennifer Lum and Peter Cocking
Ebook by Bright Wing Books (brightwing.ca)
Printed and bound in Canada by Friesens
Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books
Distributed in the US and internationally by Publishers Group West, a division of Ingram

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www.everydaylegacy.com

Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals.

The Story of Our Lives

I spent twenty years working as a funeral director and embalmer. While I long ago lost track of the number of funerals Ive arranged and directed, I can remember so many of the people I assisted and, among the strife of those I cared for, tender moments that still echo today.

Two funerals in particular changed me forever. The first was the funeral of a man named Bob, my estranged father, who taught me more after his death than he did while he was alive. Youll read about this experience later in this book.

The second funeral that changed my outlook took place a few years into my career. I was listening to the service through the speakers at the back of the chapel, as I always did. One thing I loved about my job was learning about the lives people led before coming into my care. As always, the guest of honor lay in a casket at the front of the room while his loved ones took turns sharing stories about him. Something about the way they described himgenerous, kind, always there to lend a hand, loyal, lovingstirred me.

Along with their stories came a gamut of emotions. At some points people sobbed, while at others they were laughing. Tears of sadness mixed with those from belly laughs. It was such a joyful celebration of this individuals life. I had seen other, similar funerals, but for some reason, at this one, I recall thinking, I sure hope this man knows the influence he had on these people.

Did he know what he meant to the people in that room?

Did he live every day with the awareness that he meant so much to so many?

Did he live that way on purpose?

Then a notion hit me and my mind began to spin. Id always associated legacy with the end and thought of it as something we leave behind. In an instant, I resolved that I didnt want just to leave my legacy behind when I died. I wanted to live my legacy, every day. To live consciously and cultivate an ever-present awareness of the impact I have on the people in my life.

If I lived the way I wanted to be remembered, how would that change me and those around me?

At that moment, I vowed to always strive to live my legacy every single day. And part of my legacy, I decided, would be to inspire others to do the same.

I recently attended a gala event for an association, and a woman with whom I had been at a mastermind retreat several months earlier was seated beside me. Evelynn and I hadnt known each other well when we met at the retreat, but after spending three solid days together, wed shared a fair bit about ourselves. We happened to be partnered for an exercise during which we were asked to share what was most important to us at the time, and I told her about Everyday Legacy. I was nearly done writing it, and I said that I was about to begin editing and considering my publishing options. She asked me to tell her more about the booknot about the logistics of writing it, but about its philosophy. So I did. And as I explained one of the concepts, her eyes brimmed with tears, a physical signal that the message I was conveying resonated with her on a deep, personal level. She said that, as I spoke, she was thinking about her relationships. When I finished, she cupped my hand in hers and thanked me for sharing. The next day, we went our separate ways.

Now here we were months later, seated beside each other. When the meal was finished, she leaned toward me and, over the music, said, Id like to tell you something.

We shifted our chairs closer together, and I moved in to listen.

Im so thankful we met at that retreat. I really enjoyed speaking with you.

I agreed with her. Our meeting was a highlight of the mastermind for me, too.

She squeezed my hand and looked at me with an intensity that commanded attention. You dont understand, she said. Your sharing about Everyday Legacy with me has changed the way I live my life.

I sat, speechless, thinking, My book? Has changed how she lives?

While my mind raced, overwhelmed, all I could do was look back at her and say, Thank you. I was honored and flattered and, quite honestly, taken aback. Then a thought entered my mind.

I did it.

She said, So when do you publish? When is the rest of the world going to hear your message?

I smiled and replied, Now, after hearing what you just shared, it doesnt matter.

She looked at me quizzically and said, Im confused. What do you mean?

When I wrote my book, my goal was to impact one person. While I wrote it, I realized I was already doing that. It was influencing me, and that was enough. Now I realize Ive affected one more person.

She smiled back. Everyone needs this message, she said. It will help people live more consciously and with greater purpose, and the world needs that right now.

At that moment, I felt such humility. At the time of our conversation, Id been feeling particularly vulnerable about releasing thismy first bookinto the world. She had no idea how profoundly her words affected me and that they were exactly what I needed to hear, at exactly the right time.

It may come as a surprise to some, but a career spent staring death in the face every day hasnt taught me anything about dying. It has, however, taught me everything I know about living. This book comprises stories from my life and the lessons Ive learned from living my own Everyday Legacy. My hope is that you will see yourself in these stories or recognize the situations, or you may relate to the lessons on some level.

Storytelling has been used as a tool to pass on lessons and to teach one another for as long as there have been human beings. Everyday Legacy is about drawing on experience through story and finding the relatable context that steers you more powerfully and purposefully toward your true self. Its about helping you to live the characteristics and values that are important to you, so that youre proud of what youre giving the world while youre still alive.

This is not a step-by-step how-to guide. Its a book meant to inspire conversations between you and yourself, first and foremost, to encourage you to live the way you want to be remembered after death. Every person is unique, as are your stories, your values, and your virtues. Whoever you are and whatever your story, this book will change everything you think you know about legacy. Forever. And maybe, just maybe, as happened with Evelynn, it might change your life.

Finding Connection

I loved collecting stickers when I was a kid. My mother would give me colored stars when I completed my chores, as did my teachers when I completed my schoolwork. Just like most of the kids at school, I collected any sticker I could get my hands on, and I managed to accumulate quite a few.