Eraina Ferguson - My Good Life: One Womans Quest to Raise Her Special Needs Daughter

2020 Eraina Ferguson

My Good Life

One Womans Quest to Raise Her Special Needs Daughter

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherexcept for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Elm Hill, an imprint of Thomas Nelson. Elm Hill and Thomas Nelson are registered trademarks of HarperCollins Christian Publishing, Inc.

Elm Hill titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business, fund-raising, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail .

Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.Zondervan.com. The NIV and New International Version are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Library of Congress Control Number: 2019917718

ISBN 978-1-400328383 (Hardbound)

ISBN 978-1-400328390 (eBook)

Please note that footnotes in this ebook may contain hyperlinks to external websites as part of bibliographic citations. These hyperlinks have not been activated by the publisher, who cannot verify the accuracy of these links beyond the date of publication.

L ife is fluid. As I stood in front of a group of parents at the beginning of their journey, I was asked a question about how I got to the place of peace. They were describing the peace that resonated on my face while bike riding with Taylor on Marthas Vineyard. It was indeed a crossover point. In that moment of riding a bicycle and feeling a euphoric high of peace, love, and freedom, I vowed to return to that place often. To visit the mental state of peace that existed in that moment. Over the years Ive revisited the photo, reminding myself that the good life is nowit is not a destination, but a mindset I must fight to return to daily.

That is how you should use this book. Read it, and at the end of each chapter, remember the good things that exist in your life from day to day. Are there things that you would like to change or see done differently? Change them. Set the standard and move toward the good. Build your good life one day at a time. Without lamenting, take the time to reflect on the possibilities that exist and move toward those possibilities.

For grandma, in all of my remembering,
I promise to remember well.

G ood (adjective): Morally excellent; virtuous; righteous; satisfactory in quality, quantity, or degree; of high quality

*After looking up the definition, I realize that there is only one good thing: God.

And God said, Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear. And it was so. 10 God called the dry ground land, and the gathered waters he called seas. And God saw that it was good.

(Genesis 1:9)

I felt relieved as I drove my friends 1994 Acura down Elm Street. I drove past Calhoun College and past the Yale Welcome Center. Right before I arrived at Church Street, my phone rang. I wondered who could be calling me. I knew it was not my boss; he had just blown me off. He was too busy to engage in a conversation about why I was unable to attend professional development training. Though Id run into childcare issues in the past, the last few weeks had been challenging. I was at my wits end, trying to understand why I could not do this. I had done the impossible before. Seven years to the month, I completed the same type of teacher training at a program in New York. Back then I also had the odds stacked up against me, but I pulled out my scriptures and got on my knees and prayed. In June 2003, I moved to New York City with only a job, one thousand dollars, and a dream of a good life for me and my daughter Taylor. In the past I was equipped with the stamina to deal with this situation. I had nothing left to fight with. Thirty minutes earlier, I sat with my head in my hands and sobbed. My integrity would not allow me to keep this position. I must resign and move on because finding childcare had been impossible. Handing in the resignation letter felt like failure. Despite the circumstances, I was not worried about the future. I was grateful for a moment because I was able to breathe. I could take a sigh of relief that now I could move forward, knowing that I had not kept my employer at bay. I did everything I could to make this position work.

Hello, I said.

Hi Eraina, this is Rochelle from the dining facility at Yale.

Hi how are you? I asked. I had no idea why she was calling. I remember giving her my card months earlier as I did often, but I had no idea why she would be calling now. I listened, unaware of the difficult news that she would deliver.

Eraina, she said, please stay calm.

Stay calm, I thought, why would I need to stay calm? What happened? Why was she calling? A barrage of questions ran through my mind and my heart began to beat faster. I waited to hear what the difficult news would be.

She proceeded to tell me the devastating news. Taylor had run outside naked while with the babysitter. I looked out the window and saw Taylor running down the driveway with no clothes on.

I pulled the car over as emotions flooded my body. I could not believe what I was hearing. After the initial wave of shock and disbelief flooded my body, anger and rage followed. I called the babysitter and yelled at her, asking how she could allow this to happen. Before I could spew more anger and rage, a calm voice took the phone.

Hi Eraina, this is Anna Ramirez. Anna Ramirez, the admissions counselor at Yale Divinity? I wondered why the admissions director was calling me. She was the dean of admissions at the Divinity School. As I drove by this morning, I saw Taylor and pulled over to help. Taylor is fine, she comforted. Taylor is safe, she said, just get here as soon as you can. She attempted to reassure me that everything would be okay. As I drove home, I felt relieved that someone else was there besides the babysitter.

It had been a challenging summer.