Edmund Platt - The Englishman Who Wanted to Clean France: LEscargot Anglais

LESCARGOT ANGLAIS

THE ENGLISHMAN WHO WANTED TO CLEAN FRANCE

Edmund Platt and Natacha Neveu

Copyright 2020 Edmund Platt and Natacha Neveu

The moral right of the author has been asserted.

Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or criticism or review, as permitted under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, this publication may only be reproduced, stored or transmitted, in any form or by any means, with the prior permission in writing of the publishers, or in the case of reprographic reproduction in accordance with the terms of licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside those terms should be sent to the publishers.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the authors imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

Cover design by Marie Megel

Editing by Edmund Platt and Natacha Neveu

Opening image by Vanessa Moreaux

Cover photograph by Mouna Gerchi

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ISBN 9781800468245

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Matador is an imprint of Troubador Publishing Ltd

For you Dad

1940-2019

Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals. Although the authors and publisher have made every effort to ensure that the information in this book was correct at press time, they do not assume and hereby disclaim any liability to any party for any loss, damage, or disruption caused by errors or omissions, whether such errors or omissions result from negligence, accident, or any other cause. If you are a brand, person or company that believes the contents of this book could negatively impact your image and/ or profits, but have a positive impact on the planet then you should focus on improving your product offer. If you are a sensitive type of human who takes offence to the language used in this book, then you should tell your friends to read it too to get a second opinion. Disclaimers serve to protect authors and thats great. This disclaimer serves to protect the authors and the planet, which is even better. If you feel hurt, embarrassed, segregated, singled out, financially at a loss or that your ego has been destabilised or whatever then grab your phone, call your lawyer and tell him to put his phone where the sun dont shine because thats exactly what Im about to tell you to do.

Hi, Im Eddie Platt, from Leeds in England. Im the president and co-founder of an association called 1 Piece of Rubbish and ex-European sales manager whos been living in Marseille teaching English since 2011. This book LEscargot Anglais : The Englishman Who Wanted to Clean France is the three-month diary of my 8,000 kilometres hitchhike, meeting the locals, sleeping in my hammock, drinking gallons of beer, and picking up almost two million pieces of trash during the summer of 2017. Inspired by this life-changing experience, Id like to share some of the cleanest and dirtiest moments with you, as well as my learnings and discoveries about man-made, petroleum plastic pollution, and our cancerous consumer society which is suffocating our planet and getting right on my tits.

LEscargot Anglais: The Englishman Who Wanted to Clean France is for you; whether you love France, its cheeses, fresh baguettes, wine, brandy, and climate or whether you cant stand France and its frogs legs, undercooked raw steaks, idiotic opening hours and non-existent customer service, or the French in general with their, we are ze best and we drive on ze right attitude.

Its my first book and I hope you find it entertaining, enriching and thought-provoking. Maybe youll identify with it in parts and occasionally laugh out loud in others. According to my mum, I never wrote this much throughout my entire education. Im quite proud of myself and think its totally mint that youre about to read my story. Before going any further though, heres a YouTube teaser of the trip in French with English subtitles.

This book is for everyone who still flicks their cigarette butts on the floor (as I did 10,000 times as a smoker), or not. Its for you whether youve started reducing the amount of single-use plastic in your life, or not. Its for people who chuck trash from their cars, or who leave their picnic leftovers on a bench 10 metres from a bin, or on the beach - thinking someone is paid to clean up after them, or not. This book is for you if you think that Dubai is a must-visit holiday destination and that posting a photo on Instagram with a Starbucks in your hand is good for your image. Its for you if youve got your own reusable water bottle and care about the environment and all the little interlinked ecosystems that surround us, or not. Its for you whether you earn six quid an hour, 160K a year, or nothing at all. This 90-day dont fuck my planet adventure is for you, whoever you are and wherever you may be. Enjoy, and if the intro bores you, feel free to go straight to the first chapter where the real action begins immediately with my first driver, Julien.

The original catalyst for LEscargot Anglais took place on the 14 th of August 2015 in one of my favourite places on the whole planet, Roundhay Park - my youth time haunt, in my hometown of Leeds. I was walking around Waterloo Lake at 7:30 in the morning when I picked up a can of Diet Coke. As I approached a bin with the can in hand, I decided to post a selfie on Instagram with the caption: My new habit is to pick up at least 1 piece of rubbish every day for the rest of my life - adorned with the hashtag #1PieceOfRubbish. This single photo was a huge success and received many mixed comments of support, encouragement, and bewilderment;

Come to Manchester, its horribly dirty too.

My husband does the same, good for you.

How embarrassing, why would you pick up someone elses trash?

Great job, if only more people did the same!

Who are these bellends who toss litter on the floor?

And the most famous of all was from Georges-Edouard Legr in Marseille;

If you can motivate all the Marseillais* to do it, youre my god.

Alright then! I immediately decided to rise to the challenge because after all, who wouldnt want to be someones god, even just for one day?! After my summer break in Yorkshire, I returned to Marseille and met up with Georges-Edouard to discuss cleaning Frances oldest and dirtiest city and me becoming his god. I never expected this photo and statement to go global, starting an online litter picking frenzy around the world.

Ever since that day back in August 2015, hundreds of people have been proudly posting photos of themselves picking up trash on social media. Tons of photos were flooding the internet of people picking up trash in the street, parks, beaches, cycle paths, play areas, woodlands, and anywhere theres trash (basically everywhere). All these photos were uploaded with the hashtags #1PieceOfRubbish and #1DechetParJour . Wed created a bangin eco-movement for cleaner streets, cleaner cities and a cleaner future. And I was fast becoming a litter picking god (ha ha ha) for an active, global community striving for positive change.