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Debbie Mandel - Addicted to Stress: A Womans 7 Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life

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Book:
Addicted to Stress: A Womans 7 Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life
Author:
Debbie Mandel
Publisher:
Wiley
Genre:
Books / Home and family
Year:
2008
Rating:
5 / 5
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A womans down-to-earth guide for releasing stress and reclaiming her free-spirit

Stress management expert and radio personality Debbie Mandel presents her highly original program for stress reduction. She explains that women who are constantly stressed out have forgotten the dreams of the free-spirited girl living inside them before they became somebodys wife, mother, or workplace colleague. This book, the inspiring and humorous story of successful recovery from stress addiction, outlines her seven steps that have proven to help women overcome daily stressors and reclaim a life of joy and spontaneity.

Explores the habit forming pressure principle of stress addiction and how to cure it
Provides step-by-step program for self-empowerment, self-care, healthy narcissism, and renewing humor in a womans relationships
Explains the powerful, researched based relationship between food, exercise, and mood
Contains indispensable strategies for accepting constructive conflicts with a spouse, partner, friend or colleague to get what she wants
Teaches specific techniques for reducing and eliminating stress reduction

Addicted to Stress shows how as the addiction to stress is cured, women find it possible to build up an immunity to outside pressure and become their true core self.

Debbie Mandel: author's other books

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Table of Contents

MORE PRAISE FORAddicted to Stress

Addicted to Stress offers women a wise and insightful way to recognize their patterns of stress, how this damages their daily existence, and the necessary strategies to improve their lives. By guiding us toward self-recognition and honesty, Debbie Mandel advises women to refocus their goals and behaviors in order to achieve rewards and satisfaction.

Susan Shapiro Barash, author, Little White Lies, Deep Dark Secrets: The Truth about Why Women Lie

Debbie Mandel has distilled years of experience in helping so many people in this inspirational and useful guide to living a more joyful and full life. Pearls of wisdom fill every chapter. This book is a must-read for everyone who desires better coping skills for stress and anxietyand take your time!

Dr. Mark Liponis, corporate medical director, Canyon Ranch

Debbie really hits the nail on the head. I think most of us women suffer from some stress addiction at various points in our lives, and Debbie gives great advice on how to respect and take care of yourself! Its a must-read for all women!

Chris Freytag, fitness expert, Prevention Magazine, and author, Short Cuts to Big Weight Loss

This book is an excellent guide for all women like me who dont feel human unless they are pressured. Addicted to Stress not only helps us recognize our addiction, but also guides us step-by-step to overcome the effect of this condition and restore balance in our everyday lives. This book should be a mandatory read for every woman entering the workforce and raising a family. I will recommend it in my health care practice.

Ellen W. Cutler, D.C., author, Live Free from Asthma and Allergies

To my loving family both on earth and in heaven And to my husband Steve Baby - photo 2

To my loving family both on earth and in heaven And to my husband Steve Baby - photo 3

To my loving family both on earth and in heaven And to my husband, Steve, Baby, Youre the Greatest

PREFACE

I was about to sit down on a cushioned lawn swing, cup of coffee in hand, and inhale the beauty of my garden. But then I surveyed a few imperfections, a mottled leaf here and a dangling flower there. Oh, look at that awful weed invading my perennial bed! I let my coffee get cold while I set to work pinching and clipping, the envy of any worker bee.

Suddenly, I heard a mocking voice inside my head: A womans work is never done.

Why did this old line pop into my head? StrangeI couldnt recall ever having read it.

Then I laughed as it hit me. The crows squawked too as a great white heron flapped his wings. Here I was about to sit down and relax, take a few moments of quiet time in a serene setting; but no, I found a few things to do, as though nature needed me to improve her art and I needed to perform so that others could say, Wow, look what Debbie did!

Stress had invaded my safe haven, my garden. I went into the house and Googled the old familiar saying. I found A Womans Work Is Never Done, written in 1795 by Martha Ballard, stanza after stanza depicting the tedious schedule of an eighteenth-century woman.

Theres never a day, from morn to night,
But I with work am tired quite;
For when the game with me is at the best,
I hardly in a day take one hours rest;
Sometimes I knit, and sometimes I spin,
Sometimes I wash, and sometimes I do wring.
Sometimes I sit, and sew by myself alone,
And thus a womans work is never done.

This was the aha moment when the concept of Addicted to Stress was born in my head. The words of thousands of women who attended my classes, workshops, and interactive Web site sang out the modern-day refrain:

I have to rush.

Im crazy busy.

Ive got a million things to do.

I dont know when I will get everything done.

I cant remember what it feels like to get a good nights sleep.

Instead of living happily ever after, women everywhere are forever on high alert, forever responsible, and forever giving. The worst part of this is that womenmy students, my colleagues, myself includedall seem to be trapped in a terrible habit of continuing, never-ending, self-driven activities that are in response to what we perceive to be terrible pressures at home and, for many of us, in the workplace. We cant stop, were addicted to stress, were stress addicts!

I wrote this book to liberate us: the endless to-do list must end! We cant keep missing the simple truths in life while trying to be so perfect, clever, and accomplished.

Stress addiction is equivalent to identity theftand we are the thief robbing ourselves of joy and spontaneity. Many of us dont know who we are anymore, let alone know the dreams of the free-spirited girl living inside us, the girl we were before we became the good girl, somebodys wife, mother, colleague, and friend.

You must stop being that good girl. In this book, Ill show you how to turn stress into strength, to cure your addiction as you build up an immunity to outside pressure and learn how to be your true core self again.

Join me and many other women who are overcoming their addiction to stress. And after you read this book, I hope youll ignite your inner light and let it shine brightly.

Acknowledgments

A special thank-you to my editor, Alan Rinzler, for his eloquent, sequential thinking, which kept pace with my associative mind. What a great wit! He has made me shine.

Thank you to my literary agent, Andrea Hurst, who loved the book and my Debisms and took me by the hand to guide me in formulating a winning proposal. Andrea is not only a wonderful writer in her own right but also a warm, nurturing person in a competitive world.

Thank you to Frank Mikulka, who continues to teach me all about fitness. A former Marine, he is an elite and creative trainer and martial artist, popular for his warrior classes for men and women.

Thank you to Nana Twumasi, Carol Hartland, Jennifer Wenzel, Jeff Puda, Paul Foster, and Debra Hunter, all from Jossey-Bass /John Wiley & Sons.

Thank you to my children, Michael, David, Amanda, and daughter-in-law, Lisi, for putting up with me when I talked about the bookconstantlyand for eating some of my overcooked dinners when I lost track of time writing the pages.

Thank you to my dear and loving husband, Steve, who has to deal with my feistiness and outrageous sense of humordoes he have a choice?

STEP 1

Be Aware of Your Own Stress Addiction

The first step in our process of change is to understand ourselves, to accept the fact that yes, we have a problem. But never fear, theres definitely something we can do about it.

My research with thousands of women has taught me that the biggest universal problem women have today is our attitude toward stress, the daily dynamic tension of our lives. In fact, Ive learned that living with stress for women these days has become more than a habit: its an addiction.

Thats right. Addiction. Just as with drugs or alcohol. Stress has become so ubiquitous (a fancy word for common, widespread, pervasive) that were used to it, we expect it, were actually uncomfortable if we dont have it.

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