Ruth Wolever - The Mindful Diet: How to Transform Your Relationship with Food for Lasting Weight Loss and Vibrant Health

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First Scribner hardcover edition April 2015

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Library of Congress Control Number: 2014017628

Jacket design by Gabrielle Wilson

Jacket photograph George Caswell/Photolibrary/Getty images, istock

ISBN 978-1-4516-6679-3

ISBN 978-1-4516-6682-3 (ebook)

For the gifted practitioners at Duke Integrative Medicine who opened my mind, the clients who opened my heart, and my familynear, far, and fartherwho fill it with love. May you be happy, may you be healthy, may you be safe, and may you find joy along the way.

B.R.

For my Best Guys, Mark and Emma, who nourish me and sustain me, and for all the amazing clients who have generously shared their journeys with me.

R.W.

For my mom, Evon Tefft, whose wisdom about food and health inspired a lifelong passion for both, and for my greatest joy, Stella.

T.H.

E very year, millions of Americans embark on the same quest: to lose weight and get healthy. We want more energy, we want to feel better about ourselves, and we want to live life more fully. And we know that at the core of all these changes is one roadblock: deeply ingrained eating habits. We know we need to make changesthe question is how.

Theres no shortage of simple answers out there. But simple, quick-fix solutionsin the form of conventional dietstake people on roller coaster rides that do more harm than good, damaging both health and self-esteem.

At Duke Integrative Medicine, weve developed a revolutionary approach to managing weight that offers real answers and leads to sustainable change. As part of the Duke University Health System and as a national leader in integrative medicine, our clinic offers a new approach to health care. People come to Duke IM from all over the country to experience world-class medicine and complementary therapiesin a model that puts our clients at the center of their own care, and ultimately their own healing. Instead of focusing on isolated conditions and symptoms, we focus on whole-person health, looking at all the variables that can contribute to illness and to healingincluding stress levels, nutrition and exercise, relationships, and even spirituality.

As a clinical health psychologist and as an integrative nutritionist, weve seen in our work with hundreds of clients that changing eating habits and losing weight isnt a simple equation of calories, pounds, and inchesand its not about willpower. Its about our relationship with food, with our bodies, and with ourselves. Authentic change must come from within, and thats the guiding ethos of our work. The content? An innovative approach that combines proven behavior-change strategies with cutting-edge nutrition research to reprogram both the mind and the body, transforming eating habits from the inside out. Instead of skimming the surface, the way typical diets do, our programs tap into peoples core values, the things that give them a sense of joy and satisfaction, and the goals they want to reach. And thats why they work. People in our programs change their eating habits, lose weight, and improve their healthnot just for the short term, but over time. Such lasting change is possible because people experience a new commitment to their health and to their livesand because the skills and wisdom they gain become part of who they are.

Using a foundation of mindfulnessa meditation-based approach demonstrated to help change behaviorwe guide people to practice paying attention to whats happening in their minds and bodies, moment by moment. Because we live in a culture that discourages this self-awareness, gaining it is a revelation. People in our programs learn what true physical hunger feels like, and also what theyre really hungry for. (Hint: Its not Cheez-Its.) Instead of the culturally ingrained all-or-nothing approach to eatingin which we restrict food, fall off the wagon, beat ourselves up, and give uppeople in our programs learn a nonjudgmental mindset in which every moment and every meal is new. Rather than treating their bodies as objects to be criticized and whipped into shape, they learn to treat them as worthy of care. And in place of the willpower myth that diets promote, they learn concrete skills to navigate our food-filled world and make better choices.

Laura is typical of the amazing people weve worked with whove shown us that lasting change is indeed possiblewith the right intention, skills, motivation, and practice. Long overweight, she had tried commercial diets for years but always boomeranged back to her starting weight, blaming herself for lacking willpower. She came to our clinic for a consultation after her doctor advised her to go on medicationher blood-sugar and insulin levels, which had been creeping up for two years, had moved into the danger zone.

We didnt begin by asking Laura about her eating habits; we began by asking about her life. As with many of our clients, her life was very fulloverflowingand she liked it that way. She was an ob-gyn nurse, had two teenage daughters, and spent a lot of time helping her elderly mom. When she talked about her family and her work, there was warmth in her eyes, and it was obvious that she took pride in being the strong, caring center of her worldthe person everyone leaned on. But her own health and well-being had been on the back burner for as long as she could remember. To keep up with her commitments, she had long ago settled into a pattern of eating whatevers easiestthe glazed cinnamon buns in the hospital cafeteria for breakfast, burritos and frozen pizzas for lunch and dinner, and diet soda as a quick pick-me-up during her long days. She had a nagging fear of what the road ahead would look like if she didnt change her habitsdiabetes and heart diseaseand when her doctor delivered the inevitable news, she was scared. As a nurse, she knew the devastating toll those conditions would take, not only on her but also on the people she loved. She wanted to change really changebut she knew that dieting was not the answer.