when a
man
loves
a woman
Pursuing Her Heart
J AMES F ORD J R.
M OODY P UBLISHERS
CHICAGO
2004, 2011 by
J AMES F ORD J R.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.
All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the King James Version.
Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright 1982, 1992 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 International Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible. Copyright The Lockman Foundation, 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995. Used by permission.
Prayer Quoteshttp://www.christian-prayer-quotes.christian-attorney.net/
Edited by Cynthia Ballenger
Interior design: Ragont Design
Cover design: Brand Navigation LLC
Cover images:
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Ford, James, 1951
When a man loves a woman: pursuing her heart / by James Ford, Jr.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references
ISBN 978-0-8024-6838-3
1. MenReligious Life. 2. LoveReligious AspectsChristianity.
3. Men-women relationshipsReligious aspectsChristianity. I. Title.
BV4440.F67 2004
248.8425dc22 2004009699
1 3 5 7 9 10 8 6 4 2
Printed in the United States of America
This book is dedicated to my wife, Leslie Ann Ford.
She is my 12th Rose and the inspiration behind the writing of it.
She is my faithful friend, loyal confidante, dutiful wife,
loving mother, extraordinary grandmother,
and the sole object of my affection. I thank God for her.
JACOB WENT on his journey and came to the land of the people of the East. And he looked, and saw a well in the field; and behold, there were three flocks of sheep lying by it; for out of that well they watered the flocks. A large stone was on the wells mouth. Now all the flocks would be gathered there; and they would roll the stone from the wells mouth, water the sheep, and put the stone back in its place on the wells mouth.
And Jacob said to them, My brethren, where are you from? And they said, We are from Haran. Then he said to them, Do you know Laban the son of Nahor? And they said, We know him. So he said to them, Is he well? And they said, He is well. And look, his daughter Rachel is coming with the sheep.
Then he said, Look, it is still high day; it is not time for the cattle to be gathered together. Water the sheep, and go and feed them. But they said, We cannot until all the flocks are gathered together, and they have rolled the stone from the wells mouth; then we water the sheep.
Now while he was still speaking with them, Rachel came with her fathers sheep, for she was a shepherdess. And it came to pass, when Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mothers brother, and the sheep of Laban his mothers brother, that Jacob went near and rolled the stone from the wells mouth, and watered the flock of Laban his mothers brother. Then Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice and wept. And Jacob told Rachel that he was her fathers relative and that he was Rebekahs son. So she ran and told her father.
Then it came to pass, when Laban heard the report about Jacob his sisters son, that he ran to meet him, and embraced him and kissed him, and brought him to his house. So he told Laban all these things. And Laban said to him, Surely you are my bone and my flesh. And he stayed with him for a month. Genesis 29:114 NKJV
Contents
He Wins Her by Laying a Foundation in:
Chapter 2: W HEN A M AN L OVES A W OMAN
He Will Work for Her
Chapter 3: W HEN A M AN L OVES A W OMAN
He Wants Only Her
Chapter 4: W HEN A M AN L OVES A W OMAN
He Will Wait for Her
Chapter 5: W HEN A M AN L OVES A W OMAN
He Works to Wed Her
Chapter 6: W HEN A M AN L OVES A W OMAN
He Warns Her
THE FIRST ARTIST to sing When a Man Loves a Woman was not Michael Bolton as many young people believe. Actually it was written, produced, and recorded by two others before Michael was born. Percy Sledge arranged the familiar tune in 1966, but Jacob of the Old Testament penned the first version in the twenty-ninth chapter of Genesis.
Everyone knows that Jacob of the Old Testament was a rascal, a supplanter, and a deceiver, but Jacob knew how to do one thing very well Jacob knew how to love a woman.
Jacob won Rachels heart. He was willing to work and wait to wed the only woman he ever wanted. Finally, because of his sincere commitment to protect their love, Jacob warned Rachel.
If you are a baby boomer (born between 1940 and 1960) or older, you may remember Charles Boyer. He was the suave, dapper, handsome, and graceful leading man to some of the most famous and beautiful starlets of the silver screen. However, that persona was reserved for the camera and fan magazines. In real life, Charles loved only one woman: his wife, Patricia. Everyone that knew Charles and Pat maintained that they had a lifelong love affair. They were no less lovers, friends, and companions after forty-four years of marriage than they were in their first year together.
When Patricia developed liver cancer, Charles could not bear for her to know her true condition, so for six months he sat by her bedside day and night, providing hope and cheer. Patricia eventually died in his arms. Two days after her death, Charles died by his own hand. He left a note that read, Her love was life to me. All Ive ever wanted in life was Pat. Now shes gone and life has no more meaning.
Charles Boyer was a man upon whose words and movements millions of women were fixed. Yet, he was not interested in any other woman, because he was in love with his wife. Nothing could distract or dissuade him. Charles thought of no one else. Though the winds of time, sickness, and death blew hard enough to snatch his beloved from his arms, nothing could take her from his heart.
Although Charles Boyers story is tragic, it shows how deeply this man loved his woman. Love your woman with everything youve got. You chose her because you knew she was the one for youthe one that God gave especially to you to have, to hold, and to cherish for the rest of your lives. Love your wife as Christ loves the church and find balance showing your love for your woman even in a death-related situation because of your surrender to the One who loves you unconditionally.
Men, Ive written this book so that you can read it one section at a time and not feel bombarded by the information enclosed. If you digest it a little at a time, I guarantee that you will come away with a different perspective on life, love, and what God has been trying to get your attention to tell you about how important it is to show your love for your woman.
It is my sincere hope that Jacobs life will serve as a yardstick to assist married and single Christian men in evaluating the length, breadth, width, and height of your love for the women you hold dear to continue on after you marry her. May the Lord give you comprehension of His Word as you prayerfully consider what the Scriptures have to say about what happens