Kristen Moeller - Phoenix Rising: Stories of Remarkable Women Walking Through Fire

PHENIX RISING

PHENIX

RISING

Stories of Remarkable Women Walking Through Fire

KRISTEN MOELLER & LESLIE APLIN WHARTON

PHOENIX RISING

Stories of Remarkable Women Walking Through Fire
2016 KRISTEN MOELLER & LESLIE APLIN WHARTON.

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Published in New York, New York, by Morgan James Publishing. Morgan James and The Entrepreneurial Publisher are trademarks of Morgan James, LLC. www.MorganJamesPublishing.com

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ISBN 978-1-63047-723-3 paperback
ISBN 978-1-63047-724-0 eBook
Library of Congress Control Number: 2015912340

Cover Photo by:
Jessica Wilson

Cover Design by:
Rachel Lopez
www.r2cdesign.com

Interior Design by:
Bonnie Bushman
The Whole Caboodle Graphic Design

In an effort to support local communities and raise awareness and funds, Morgan James Publishing donates a percentage of all book sales for the life of each book to Habitat for Humanity Peninsula and Greater Williamsburg.

To our fellow firewalkers
may we all keep on walking

Contents

Foreword

What would you take if you had five minutes to flee from your home? What would you say if you knew your life was ending? And if it didnt, if disaster spared your life but ruined most of its trappings, what then? These are the questions lived and explored in these pages.

Many of us, if were lucky, have only paused to consider such hypotheticals while watching news of wildfires or floods or tornadoesterrified people seeking refuge, heartbroken homeowners surveying their losses, bereaved families grieving their loved ones. But we only see fragmented snapshots of those moments.

In this gem of a book written by women united by wildfire, we have the privilege of stepping into those moments to stand in the hallways of their shock and fear, grief and disorientation, and then, armed with the wisdom of retrospection, walking out into whatever comes next. Its nothing less than being witness to the very act of creation itself: from chaos, order; from nothingness, something. Kind of like fire and the regeneration that follows.

Ive heard that during an explosion, theres a moment when all of the pieces that have been blown apart seem to freeze and hang suspended in the air. Its similar when the entire container of your life ceases to existthe reeling sense of dislocation, as if youre just floating, alone and disjointed. In addition to wildfire itself, that experience and what comes after it is what the stories youre about to read have in common.

The authors, either born in or drawn to the Wests vast spaces and galloping wilderness, demonstrate the unique blend of grit and vulnerability, doggedness and reflection, so characteristic of the regions most memorable women (think shooter Annie Oakley, frontier novelist Willa Cather, and Cherokee Chief Wilma Mankiller). All of them respond differently to their fire experience, but their responses have common themes: First, they adhere to the old saying that one of them quotes, When the going gets tough, the tough get going. This means sprinting from flames leading a beloved horse, working tirelessly as a firefighter to save homes, searching for an interim home capable of accommodating not only a family but also a troupe of dogs, horses and ducks, or digging for remnants of a cherished home before clearing away the rubble to rebuild.

Second, these women search for meaning amid so many questions: What is home when its lost? Who are we without the items we have collected and carried with us through the yearsa comfortable old Saints t-shirt from New Orleans, a glamorous Diane Von Furstenberg coat, or an ice cream maker and knitted chair covers inherited from a grandmother? Sifting through ash is also sifting through memory. Whatever we choose to bring with us and the meaning we make of it, be it a shard of green pottery, a charred totem pole, or the recollection of belonging somewhere, will help to determine who we become.

Third, these women show us resilience. Most of us know the metaphor of the lodgepole pine, which requires wildfire for the cones to open and release seeds. Thats an apt starting point for the resilience shown in these stories, but its only the beginning. Because the authors dont merely keep going, perpetuating life in rote numbness. No. They succeed in maintaining their hearts, their vibrance, their joy. We can take inspiration in the way they live this truth: No matter how unfair this world may be, its up to us to figure out how to be happy and productive while living in it. No one can fix it for us, and no one can do that for us. That central fact of life will never change for any of us as long as were here, no matter the particular circumstance, whether wildfire or anything else (By the time anyone turns 40 or 50, theyve gone through at least one explosion that has destroyed the container of their life: Betrayal. Divorce. Illness. Shattered dreams of varied stripes and colors). Its the constant challenge, and the constant opportunity. To keep going and keep finding joy, no matter how unjust the world or how undesirable our lives may seem at any moment.

Kurt Vonnegut wrote, Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.

These women are a shining example of that, whether after the fires they moved to a cool, moist place, starred in a television show, found a new home in the city or rebuilt a home where their old one once stood.

My favorite part of reading their stories is that I felt as if I were gathered round a fire with a favorite group of women. When it comes to withstanding and making meaning of the most painful twists of this mysterious life, or enjoying its surprising rewards, nothing compares to the company of other women and their stories. Fire and life are alike in their ability to warm and sustain, as well as damage and ruin, and we cant have one power without the other. Its the same with our personalitiesthe frailties and flaws co-exist with the attributes and strengths. Theyre inextricable. Which is why the Buddhists recommend sitting with the undesirablemaking friends with it, in a sensewithout trying to erase or resist it. While its tempting to write about rising from the ash as some redemptive tale in which everything becomes good again, thats not what life is. Its about holding the good and the bad, the beautiful and the terrible, and fashioning a meaningful existence filled with love along the way. Doing that in the company of other women makes the pain more bearable and the beauty more divine. And thats the greatest gift of this book.