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PRAISE FOR THE CHAPO GUIDE TO REVOLUTION
I havent had my worldview exploded by a political work like this since reading Millies Book in 1992.
Patton Oswalt, New York Times bestselling author of Silver Screen Fiend
The raucous dirtbag hilarity of the Chapo crew sometimes masks the fact that they reliably provide some of the most incisive, sophisticated, and thought-provoking political analysis found on any platform. Their book is as intellectually serious and analytically original as it is irreverent and funny, and it deserves substantial discussion and all of the gushing and angry reactions it will inevitably provoke.
Glenn Greenwald, New York Times bestselling author of No Place to Hide
In my day, it didnt take fifteen goddamn people to write a book. Nevertheless, this was an exceptional, funny, and entertaining read. Howard Zinn on acid or some bullshit like that.
Tim Heidecker, coauthor of Tim and Erics Zone Theory
Garrote sharp, acerbic, smart, inventive, and truly laugh-out-loud funny, The Chapo Guide to Revolution feels like it was written by the offspring of the shotgun marriage of The Onion , Howard Zinn, Dorothy Parker, Bill Hicks, Noam Chomsky, and Jonathan Swift. If they all got together and fucked and had one baby, I mean. I LOVED this book.
David Cross, New York Times bestselling author of I Drink for a Reason
Perhaps in Victorian England a spoonful of sugar helped the medicine go down, but in the hellscape of contemporary American politics, the Chapo Trap House crew does well to swap out sweetener and deliver its punchy political analysis with a big dose of snark, wit, and lolz. Lovers of the podcast will revel in righteous takedowns and scathing portraits of galling political self-interest, while newcomers to the brand and veterans alike will enjoy the frank and funny introduction to the contemptible political players, online feuds, Marxist themes, and partisan blood-letting that are the grist of the Chapo podcast, and which have made it a site of catharsis for an entire doomed generation.
Briahna Joy Gray, senior politics editor at The Intercept
Finally a book that explains why I shouldnt like Matt Yglesias. And so many others. All the monsters we encounter online have been laid out and torn asunder in spectacular fashion. This book is like those fleeting moments of the Chapo Trap House podcast that have clarity.
Dave Anthony, coauthor of The United States of Absurdity
PRAISE FOR CHAPO TRAP HOUSE
Intolerant Vulgarians.
The Federalist
Aggressively masculine.
Jamie Kirchick
Juvenile guys with one lady who trash people and talk about obscure and sometimes gross topics.
Joan Walsh
Conveys a hunger for dominance and submission.
The New Republic
Touchstone
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Copyright 2018 by Large Sons Productions, LLC
All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. For information, address Touchstone Subsidiary Rights Department, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020.
First Touchstone hardcover edition August 2018
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Interior design by Jason Snyder
Cover design by Jason Heuer
Cover image by Wong Yu Liang/Shutterstock
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.
ISBN 978-1-5011-8728-5
ISBN 978-1-5011-8730-8 (ebook)
This book is dedicated to the brave Mujahideen fighters of Afghanistan.
INTRODUCTION
BORROW THIS BOOK
F or two years now, youve been asking, Who is Chapo Trap House? This is Chapo Trap House speaking. We are Chapo, a podcast that loves life, coffee, doggos, bourbon, and intelligent debate. We are the podcast that does not sacrifice our love for those things or our values. We are the ironic pieces of shit who have deprived you of victims and thus destroyed your world with your own logic. If you wish to know why youre perishingyou who dread knowledgewe are the gang who will now tell you.
If youre reading these words, youre likely living in despair and hopelessness. Youre fed a steady diet of thin, flavorless gruel by your leaders, your parents, fake friends who love drama, the fascist mods on Erowid and r/celebritytoes, the lying sheeple news media, and, most especially, all previous works of political satire and comedy. You find yourself in the dumbest of all possible worlds, clowns to the left of you, Re-thug-licans to the right. And the president? How about... NO. Like a veal calf, you sit in your crate, every day growing sadder, softer, and more delicious, thinking, Theres got to be a better way!
Friend, were here to tell you that there is a better way: the Chapo Way.
This is the beginning of a journey you will never forget. In this book, well survey the blasted landscape of contemporary American politics and culture through our scientific ideology of irony, half-baked Marxism, revolutionary discipline, NoFap November, and posting on the Internet. Youll become an initiate in the Chapo Mindset and take control of the neurons that govern your weak, fragile emotions. You will experience success, probably for the first time. You will learn to live your life on your terms. By buying this book and all its affiliated content, youll improve your health and fitness, have stronger relationships, straighten your posture, purify your brain chemistry, and gain more focus. Your children and ex-wife will respect you.
In addition to desiring to become a Brain-Clear Alpha Silverback Gray Wolf, youre probably also interested in politics, and in taking a sideways glance at the news through the lens of satire. Maybe you became politically aware one crisp, clear Tuesday morning in September, when you got the day off from school; you noticed your local GameStop clerk had tears in his eyes as he waived your late fee on Tom Clancys Rainbow Six . Perhaps around the time America decided to invade Afghanistan and then Iraq, you had an inkling that living in the End of History wasnt going to be as utopian as promised. Maybe after John Kerry reported for duty at the 2004 Democratic Convention, you felt a brief twinge of patriotic embarrassment followed by a bone-deep sense that things will never get better. Or maybe it was when you graduated from college with six figures of debt around the time the economy shit its insides out.
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