Christy Whittlesey - The Beginners Guide to Being a Trans Ally

Christy Whittlesey has written a must-have guide for anyone seeking to understand and learn what it means to be an ally of the transgender community. She encourages readers to continue to listen, disrupt the system, and be a voice when others cant. It is full of important information like the power of pronouns and the significance of intersectionality. Whittlesey empowers readers to embrace individuals in their workplace, family, and community.

Dr Rayna L. Freedman, fifth grade teacher, MassCUE
President, and accomplice to the LGBTQIA+ community

An impressive introductory guide to being an ally to a person who is transgender or nonbinary. There are helpful tips related to the importance of language, use of listening skills, and normalizing gender-neutral practices in our daily lives. The content of this book ultimately reminds us to be mindful of the humanity of every person we encounter.

Latosha Dixon (she/her), Vice-Chair of the Chelmsford
Diversity Racial Equity and Inclusion Committee

Christy provides information that every parent should know about being a trans or nonbinary ally, including resources on where to find out more. She gets you thinking from a different perspective and shows that trans people just want to be heard, affirmed, and feel safe. Being a trans ally means taking small, everyday actions. We can all think about our environments and consider how we might make them more gender-inclusive.

Kathy Sheedy, mother and volunteer for The Ryan
Home Project (home for homeless teens)

This book unpacks gender diversity by centering the trans voices we hope to become allies for. Through reading these narratives we learn that becoming an ally is moving from ignorance or complicity to a continuum of continual action that affirms and celebrates our trans students, family members, friends, co-workers, and community members. This resource also serves as a user-friendly toolkit with clear techniques for more inclusive allyship. It is a must-read for educators and families alike.

Anthony Beatrice, Executive Director for the Arts,
Boston Public Schools

This is a well-written, well-researched book that is very informative for the general reader, like me. Excellent recommendations for navigating this changing world and being supportive of trans friends and family members.

Don M., Boston, MA

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THE BEGINNERS

GUIDE TO

BEING A

TRANS

ALLY

DR. CHRISTY WHITTLESEY

First published in Great Britain in 2022 by Jessica Kingsley Publishers

An Hachette Company

Copyright Christy Whittlesey 2022

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

A CIP catalogue record for this title is available from
the British Library and the Library of Congress

ISBN 978 1 78775 783 7

eISBN 978 1 78775 784 4

Jessica Kingsley Publishers policy is to use papers that are natural, renewable and recyclable products and made from wood grown in sustainable forests. The logging and manufacturing processes are expected to conform to the environmental regulations of the country of origin.

Jessica Kingsley Publishers

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To Emma

Special thanks to Dr. Judy Davidson for her mentorship that set me on this path; to all the amazing participants who contributed their time and shared stories and perspectives with me for this book; to my first readers and unwavering supporters Roger Whittlesey and Bernie Bluhm; and to my family, whose love and encouragement have kept me going through 2020 and beyond. Finally, thank you to Andrew James and the team at Jessica Kingsley Publishers for your commitment to diversity and inclusion and for keeping me focused on this project during the pandemic!

This is a book about the idea of trans allyship and how people like mesomeone who is not transgendercan effectively participate in building a more safe, equitable, and inclusive world for people who are trans and nonbinary. Being a true ally is not about labeling oneself as suchit is about continually engaging in learning, listening, and taking action.

Why is this important?

For me, this is about liberation. Trans visual artist Micah Bazant addresses this idea, creating art that engages with social justice movements and inspires us as viewers to decolonize ourselves from white supremacy, patriarchy, ableism, and the gender binary (Bazant, n.d.). One of my favorite pieces of theirs is a portrait of Marsha P. (Pay It No Mind) Johnson, a Black activist and self-identified drag queen who was a noted figure in the Stonewall uprising of 1969; she also worked with her friend Sylvia Rivera to open the first LGBT youth shelter in the U.S., and was deeply involved with the AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power.

Bazants portrait features Johnson with flowers in her hair against a blue background, with the statement No Pride for Some of Us Without Liberation for All of Us prominently featured above her head. Bazants words in this piece are inspired by Johnsons activism and her message that we should not celebrate while so many are oppressed.

All oppression is linked. When we participate in limiting or excluding others, we diminish the fulfillment of our own humanity. In order to acknowledge and celebrate the diversity that enriches our communities, we need to stand up for one another. Working for liberation for all is important if we are all to benefit from more inclusive and equitable communities. As we seek to be true allies to our trans and nonbinary family members, friends, colleagues, and community members, we must not only educate ourselves and engage with the trans and nonbinary individuals we know in an affirming and respectful way, but also make consistent and deliberate efforts to dismantle systems that cause harm.

The importance of allyship work cannot be underestimated, as while over the past few decades, transgender and nonbinary individuals have become more visible in media and politics, people who do not look or behave in ways that align with traditional gender stereotypes are still often marginalized or attacked. Street harassment is commonplace for people whose appearances do not align with prevailing gender norms (Davis, 2017), and, in fact, violence against trans people has risen over the past few years; the Human Rights Campaign officially recorded more violent deaths of transgender and gender non-conforming people in the U.S. in 2020 than in any year since it began tracking data (Human Rights Campaign, 2020).