All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without the permission in writing from the publisher.
Published by RDV Books/Akashic Books
2003 The Tides Center/Peaceful Tomorrows
ePUB ISBN-13: 978-1-617-75021-2
ISBN: 0-9719206-4-8
Library of Congress Card Number: 2003106947
All rights reserved
First printing
Printed in Canada
Cover design by Keith Campbell
Layout by Sohrab Habibion and Alexis Fleisig
Grateful acknowledgment is made for the permission to print the following photographs and video stills: front cover photo of view from the stage at the April 20, 2002 march on Washington Peaceful Tomorrows; back cover photo of Rita Lasar with the Japanese HANWA delegation outside St. Pauls Church in New York City David Potorti; back cover photo of David Potorti, Ryan Amundson, and Colleen Kelly claiming their rights in Washington Square Park, December 2002 Peaceful Tomorrows; Jenny Warburg.
Grateful acknowledgment is also made for the permission to reprint the lyrics to the songs Kristina Olsen, inspired by the Ella Wheeler Wilcox poem by the same name that comprises the songs first verse.
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As we opened our eyes on the morning of September 11, 2001, few of us realized how many goodbyes that day would bring: to people we loved and places we knew, to our plans for the future and our sense of control over our lives, to the trust we had in our safety and our nations institutions. We had no idea how many holes would open up on that day, not just in the terrain of lower Manhattan, or Washington, or Shanksville, but in our hearts and in our spirits. Into those holes went not only the memories of thousands of individuals, but thousands of expressions of love they would have brought into the world.
Those of us who lost family members that morning found ourselves in particularly painful positions. Our losses were not simple murders, but international incidents, symbols, and public events. Billions of people experienced the exact moment of our loved ones deaths. And whether we liked it or not, their deaths would become public property. They would be invoked on any number of occasions, for any number of purposes, by people we didnt know, and in many cases, didnt agree with or care for.
Most of us chose to turn off our televisions and radios as we dealt with our difficult grief. But some of us, recognizing the public nature of our losses, chose to redeem them by making public statements that frequently were at odds with conventional wisdom about what families of the victims must be feeling. It was through those statements that the people who formed September 11th Families for Peaceful Tomorrows met and organized themselves into a nonprofit group seeking alternatives to war and working to end the cycle of violence.
We had no business knowing each other. We were different ages, came from different places, and had decidedly different backgrounds, personalities, and life experiences. We werent saints by any stretch of the imagination, and had frequent disagreements about what we were doing. We had a lot to learn about the world and about each other.
But like disparate people who get stuck together in a doorway during a thunderstorm, we came to realize that human beings pass their days in endless combinations, have more in common than they think, and can work together toward just about any shared goal. Honoring our lost family members has always been that goal, and it is our memories of them that constantly keep us on track in what we choose to door not to doas members of Peaceful Tomorrows.
While September 11 remains for many the genesis of new fears, new suspicions, and a redoubling of efforts to secure themselves and their possessions, for us it was a day that demolished the belief that we could ever be truly independent of each other. It was a day when the walls came down, not up. It was a day when we realized that our weapons could no longer protect us. And that our children would never be safe unless unseen children on the other side of the world were safe as well.
One can look at our public witnessspeaking at schools, places of worship, rallies, and conventions in twenty-nine states and eight foreign countriesand ask how it could possibly replace the people we lost that day, or ever set the world straight again. In fact, we have been the biggest beneficiaries of our own work, and have derived from it a sense of personal peace, security, and focus. We refuse to believe in an us-versus-them world, recognizing instead that we can, and must, create the world we want to live in. It is an ongoing process. No one will do it for us.
The deaths of our family members stand not as a legacy of hatred and fear but as a challenge to aspire to better things. September 11 remains as an invitation for Americans to enter the new millennium and to join the rest of the world, accepting the challenge to deal honestly with the global responsibilities that come with being a global superpower.
This book tells the story of how members of September 11th Families for Peaceful Tomorrows recognized and rose to those responsibilities; how speaking out connected us with each other; how people around the country and the world extended their hands in friendship to our group; and how we continue to fill the holes in our hearts with new connections, new love, and new possibilities.
From our shared experiences, Ive written a running history of our group, including my own participation. Along the way, youll find personal essays written by a number of our most active members. And Ive included some of the e-mails from around the world that have been posted to our websites guestbook, giving a taste of the issues raisedand emotions arousedby our work. These e-mails, along with press releases, links to media coverage, newsletters, and ways to join or contribute to our organization, can be found at www.peacefultomorrows.org
In the days following September 11, America had a unique opportunity to transform the deaths of our family members into the birth of a new paradigm for the planet, an arrangement that recognized our mutual humanity, mutual needs, and mutual goals. The hand of friendship that was offered to us by the people of virtually every nation on earth remains extended. We continue to reach out our hands in return, and in so doing, hope that our nation will collectively do the same.
David Potorti
Cary, North Carolina
July 2003
We must overturn so many idols,
the idol of self first of all,
so that we can be humble,
and only from our humility
can we learn to be redeemers,
can learn to work together
in a way the world really needs.
Oscar Romero, The Violence of Love
September 11, 2001, 8:46 A.M. A week after Labor Day, summer shows no intention of leaving North Carolina. As birds chirp in a thick canopy of trees, the still air hanging outside of David Potortis bedroom window is already warm enough to eliminate the possibility of eating lunch outdoors. He opens one eye and fixes it on his bedside clock. A first-time father in his forties, he spent a good part of the night rocking his 14-month-old son to sleep, earning him the privilege of sleeping inone of the good things about downsizing his life as a writer in Los Angeles for a life in the burbs. His wife, a college English teacher, works away from home only two days a week, leaving both of them plenty of time for family. He rolls over and sees her peeking through the bedroom door with their son: Daddys up! The pair climbs into bed with him for a group hug. It is, he decides, an exquisite little moment.
