Lopes - DAD TIREDAND LOVING IT: stumbling your way to spiritual leadership

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS

EUGENE , OREGON

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DAD TIRED AND LOVING IT

Copyright 2019 by Jerrad Lopes

Published by Harvest House Publishers

Eugene, Oregon 97408

www.harvesthousepublishers.com

ISBN 978-0-7369-7716-6 (hardcover)

ISBN 978-0-7369-7717-3 (eBook)

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Lopes, Jerrad, author.

Title: Dad tired : and loving it / Jerrad Lopes.

Description: Eugene, Oregon: Harvest House Publishers, [2019]

Identifiers: LCCN 2019011912 (print) | LCCN 2019014448 (ebook) | ISBN 9780736977173 (ebook) | ISBN 9780736977166 (hardcover)

Subjects: LCSH: FatherhoodReligious aspectsChristianity. FathersReligious life.

Classification: LCC BV4529.17 (ebook) | LCC BV4529.17 .L67 2019 (print) | DDC 248.8/421dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2019011912

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To my wife, who has given me a glimpse of what Gods radical grace and love look like here on earth.

To my mom, who in many ways had to be both Mom tired and Dad tired as she raised me by herself.

To my mother-in-law, who constantly watched my kids so I could find some quiet time to write this book.

And to my children, who are being used by

God to help make me more like him.

CONTENTS

W hen I was a junior in high school, I landed my first-ever job at a local gym in town. I have to admit, as a sixteen-year-old boy, it sounded pretty cool to tell your peers that you worked as a gym employee. I never really told them exactly what I did at my job; I just wanted my friends to imagine that it was something amazing. In my mind, I hoped they pictured me lifting weights and teaching other people how to get in the best shape of their lives.

The truth is, I was a towel boy.

My job was to collect the nasty, sweaty, used towels from around the facility, throw them in a giant bin, wash them, fold them, and then hand them to the members as they walked in the front door.

It was far from glamorous. In fact, most of the time it was completely disgusting, and I spent the majority of my shift trying not to vomit. But I was determined to convince my friends that I had the best job in the worldand, more importantly, that I was an expert in physical fitness.

I wasnt an expert in physical fitness, however. I was a towel boy.

I didnt possess the skills to get my friends in shape, but I could offer them a clean towel.

Sometimes when I tell people I run a ministry for young dads, I secretly hope they think Im an expert in parenting. In my mind, I imagine they look at me as a young father who has wisdom well beyond his years.

The truth is, when it comes to parenting, Im a towel boy.

At the time of my writing this book, I have a seven-year-old boy, a five-year-old girl, and a baby girl on the way. It would be insane for me to try to convince you that I have some secret knowledge of what it means to be a superdad.

When it comes to stumbling your way toward becoming the spiritual leader of your home, I am getting tripped up right alongside you. In fact, as I wrote this introduction, I had to pause, step away from the computer, and go yell at my kids in the front yard.

Heres the thing: As a young dad, Im not necessarily looking for a magic formula on how to raise kids, written by someone much older than me. Ill take all the advice I can get, but I also know there are no shortcuts or get-the-perfect-kid-quick methods out there.

Im not looking for the latest parenting trends. Im looking for Jesus.

Thats why I wrote this book.

I personally wanted to know what the Scriptures had to say about what it means to lead my family well. Like many of my peers, I didnt have a dad around when I was growing up, so I had no one to teach me what spiritual leadership looks like.

This book is filled with a lot of practical tips on how to become the spiritual leader of your home, but it goes much deeper than some how-tos. It aims to get at the heart behind them.

If you have raised a child who is older than two years old, you know they all go through the why phase, when they question everything.

In some ways, Im not sure I ever left the why stage. I know Im supposed to be leading my family as the spiritual leader of the house, but I wanted to know why. Why did God call us to this task? And what does spiritual leadership look like today?

I dont think Im qualified to teach you how to be the perfect dad. But Im willing to toss you a clean towel. Im willing to hop on the treadmill next to you and start fresh at this whole spiritual leadership thing. Most importantly, Im willing to join you in chasing after the Perfect Father as together we learn what it means to raise children who passionately follow him.

Ultimately my prayer is that by the end of this book, you will have fallen more in love with Jesus and as a result help your wife and children do the same.

Im glad to be on this journey with you, brother. Lets start stumbling forward.

Why the Gospel Changes Everything

I m color-blind.

Sometimes I find myself watching online videos of color-blind people trying on corrective color-blind glasses for the first time. In case you havent heard, apparently someone has invented eyeglasses that can allow a color-blind person to see the world in normal color. One mans wife surprised him with a pair of these glasses as a gift, and as the viewers, we get to see his response to seeing the world in color for the first time.

At first, hes trying to play it pretty cool. As any confident man would do, he doesnt seem to act overly surprised or emotional. From behind the camera, you can hear his wife say, Look at your kids eyes. And thats when things take a turn. As he looks down at his daughter and stares her in the eyes, he begins to get emotional. He fights back the tears as he sees the beautiful color of his daughters eyes for the first time.