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Mullally Megan - The greatest love story ever told: an oral history

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Mullally Megan The greatest love story ever told: an oral history
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    The greatest love story ever told: an oral history
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The greatest love story ever told: an oral history: summary, description and annotation

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The popular comedic couple trace the story of their relationship, sharing anecdotes, family photos, and secrets that reveal how they overcame considerable social differences through their shared values and mutual love of music and laughter.

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An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC 375 Hudson Street New York New York - photo 1
An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC 375 Hudson Street New York New York - photo 2

An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC 375 Hudson Street New York New York - photo 3

An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC

375 Hudson Street

New York, New York 10014

Copyright 2018 by Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman Penguin supports copyright - photo 4

Copyright 2018 by Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman

Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.

DUTTON and the D colophon are registered trademarks of Penguin Random House LLC.

Chapter opening photographs by Emily Shur

Illustration and lettering by Meryl Rowin

LIBRARY OF CONGRESS CATALOGING-IN-PUBLICATION DATA

has been applied for.

ISBN 9781101986677 (hardcover)

ISBN 9781101986684 (ebook)

While the authors have made every effort to provide accurate telephone numbers, Internet addresses, and other contact information at the time of publication, neither the publisher nor the authors assume any responsibility for errors or for changes that occur after publication. Further, the publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for authors or third-party websites or their content.

Penguin is committed to publishing works of quality and integrity. In that spirit, we are proud to offer this book to our readers; however, the story, the experiences, and the words are the authors alone.

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CONTENTS - photo 5
CONTENTS Megan All right Bum-ba-da-dum Blastoff Laughs This is - photo 6
CONTENTS
Megan All right Bum-ba-da-dum Blastoff Laughs This is the introduction to - photo 7
Megan All right Bum-ba-da-dum Blastoff Laughs This is the introduction to - photo 8

Megan: All right! Bum-ba-da-dum! Blastoff! (Laughs) This is the introduction to our book. Carefully and meticulously handcrafted, word by word.

Nick: Start your engines.

M: This book consists of our time-tested insights into a number of topics, mostly in the areas of math and science.

N: Its riddled with sordid details.

M: Sordid math details?

N: Thats right.

M: Like pi...

N: There are specific algorithms we created concerning the relationship between a woman and a man...

M: The birds and the bees.

N: The body produces its own lubrication in many instances...

M: Oh, wait a minute. This is the intro! Dude!

N: Thats physics!

M: No, no. Too soon! We do get into lubricants of various kinds. But not until later on in the book. Lets not open with that.

So, Nick, how would you describe this kick-ass sheaf?

N: To my way of thinking, its an illustration of a relationship that the reader might find surprisingly normal. When all you have by which to judge a relationship are some grippingly cute Instagram videos, it might not occur to one that theres a lot of banal real life.

M: So this book is all the boring stuff? (Laughs)

N: Yeah.

M: Great! Its going to sell like hotcakes.

N: Its more than just cuteness and puzzles with us. There is also a great deal of tedium.

M: We wanted to make sure we got that down on paper.

N: Yes. We intend to elaborate for your reading pleasure.

M: Who would you say is the ideal audience for this book?

N: Altar boys?

M:(Laughs) This is a multigenerational, multigenderational, postmodernist deconstruction of the greatest love story ever told. Meaning, our relationship.

N: Its for readers young and old, male and female, as well as LGBTQ...

M:... AI.

N: AI. And also every race, religion, every creed, every political leaning will find something to learn about the bodys ability to lubricate itself.

M: No! Well, all right... I have to concede, that is what the book is about.

N: When you think about it, what we all have in common is a sort of assemblage of meat that has interesting nooks and crannies.

M: Well, yeah, but then you have to find another meat assemblage with its own nooks and crannies, and then you have to start making the love.

N: Youve hooked me. If I were reading this introduction, I would now plunge ahead to chapter one.

M: Thats the hook of the book. Meatloaf.

N: Meatloaf... with gravy.

M: Oh god. (Laughs) Youve circled back around.

So, yes, it is in fact a book about the love affairthe nonplatonic relationshipbetween Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally, married couple and holders of social media accounts. Thats probably our biggest claim to fame, right?

N: Yes, thats our thing.

M: My whole thing is really just my Twitter.

N: Two people who have thrilled millions upon social media. And also done some other things.

M: And two people who are extremely devoted to athletics. Sports! Sports of all kinds.

N: If you love sports...

M: Youre going to fucking shit over this book.

N: Youre going to blow a load.

M: Hes back to the lubricants here.

N: That just proves my point.

M: We have groundbreakingly divided this searing examination of a relationship between two human beings into chapters with different subject matters and headings. Its an oral history presented to you in an organized yet playful fashion, dotted here and there with photography and cute drawings.

N: Before you dive in, make sure youve had a good meal. Youll want to make sure youre hydrated. And if youre of age, a little bit of intoxication would not hurt the consumption of this tome. And then you may want to buckle up. Actually strap into a seat, because otherwise you might end up on the floor. If youre wearing a hat, go ahead and remove it, because its guaranteed to fly off by the end of chapter three.

M: All right... I dont think weve oversold it.

N: No, I dont think that, of the many dangers facing us...

M: I think weve exercised a good deal of restraint in our praise of our own book about ourselves.

N: Antony and Cleopatra...

M: Fuck off.

N: Samson and Delilah...

M: Get lost.

N: Bogart and Bacall...

M: Never had a chance.

N: Suck it.

M: All right! See you guys in the book!

N: See you there!

Megan Hi Dad Nick Hi M Were starting our book now What day is it N - photo 9
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