Lewis Richmond - Every Breath, New Chances

Make no mistake, this book is not just for men! Every Breath, New Chances is a wise and compassionate companion in the journey of aging. Lewis Richmond shares his own experiences of aging and provides Deep Mind Reflection exercises to explore inner feelings and other aspects of aging. He encourages the reader to meet these challenges as a rich opportunity for personal growth and development. For women, Richmonds insights are not only helpful for better understanding those in their life who are facing the fact that they no longer possess the virility, power, and control they once had, but also for understanding the feminine path of aging. This is a must-companion along the way.

Diane Eshin Rizzetto, author of Waking Up to What You Do

This is a book you can trust to guide you as you age! Every Breath New Chances is rooted in real wisdom and full of heart. It deepens many aspects of growing older and being a man without being too simple or too loud. Richmond really wants you to get more out of life. Im about to turn eighty, and I feel better for having read it.

Thomas Moore, author of Care of the Soul

To process the mental and emotional challenges he faced growing older, Lewis Richmond says he wrote the book he needed. That sound writing advice has produced a one-of-a-kind toolkit with insights and practices that show others how to bring alive (and thus gain life-changing wisdom from) the books profound core message: vulnerability is strength.

Paula Spencer Scott, author of Surviving Alzheimers

As my entire generation moves toward its end, I cant think of a more helpful, necessary book. Lewis Richmond offers a calm and systematic framework and practice to help you get the most out of your life right now! Why miss a second of it? Why not learn to love our growing old? This book will help you.

Peter Coyote, actor, writer, Zen priest, and author of Sleeping Where I Fall

Every Breath, New Chances is the first of its kindan incredibly valuable book on male aging covering all the salient points. I highly recommend it, both for men and the women who care about them.

Lama Palden Drolma, author of Love on Every Breath

Copyright 2020 by Lewis Richmond. All rights reserved. No portion of this book, except for brief review, may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwisewithout the written permission of the publisher. For information contact North Atlantic Books.

Published by
North Atlantic Books
Berkeley, California

Cover art by gettyimages.com/GeorgePeters
Cover design by John Yates
Book design by Happenstance Type-O-Rama

Printed in the United States of America

Every Breath, New Chances: How to Age with Honor and Dignity is sponsored and published by the Society for the Study of Native Arts and Sciences (dba North Atlantic Books), an educational nonprofit based in Berkeley, California, that collaborates with partners to develop cross-cultural perspectives, nurture holistic views of art, science, the humanities, and healing, and seed personal and global transformation by publishing work on the relationship of body, spirit, and nature.

North Atlantic Books publications are available through most bookstores. For further information, visit our website at www.northatlanticbooks.com or call 800-733-3000.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Richmond, L. (Lewis), 1947- author.
Title: Every Breath, New Chances : How to Age with Honor and Dignity: A Guide
for Men / Lewis Richmond.
Description: Berkeley : North Atlantic Books, 2020.
Identifiers: LCCN 2020005404 (print) | LCCN 2020005405 (ebook) | ISBN
9781623174071 (trade paperback) | ISBN 9781623174088 (ebook)
Subjects: LCSH: Older menPsychology. | Self-help techniques.
Classification: LCC HQ1090 .R513 2020 (print) | LCC HQ1090 (ebook) | DDC
646.7/9dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020005404
LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020005405

This book includes recycled material and material from well-managed forests. North Atlantic Books is committed to the protection of our environment. We print on recycled paper whenever possible and partner with printers who strive to use environmentally responsible practices.

1. Work as a Spiritual Practice
2. Healing Lazarus
3. A Whole Lifes Work
4. Aging as a Spiritual Practice

This book is dedicated to all aging men and the people who love them

I would first like to thank my literary agent, Barbara Lowenstein, for her inspiration and encouragement to write this book. Left to my own devices, it might not have happened. Tim McKee, publisher of North Atlantic, played an outsized role in bringing this book to fruitionnot only as the final decision maker in accepting the book, but also by devoting his time and energy as primary editor during its writing. I would also like to thank acquisitions editors Keith Donnell and Pam Berkman, production editor Trisha Peck, copyeditor Jennifer Eastman, and all the people on the production team at North Atlantic Books. They included me and consulted with me every step of the wayan authors dream!

Many people contributed valuable content to the book and made it come alive through their anecdotes, stories, professional advice, strategic direction, and editorial suggestions. My heartfelt thanks to all of them: Marc Agronin, Ralph Bragg, Peter Coyote, Scott Davis, Michael Denneny, Cathy Dykes, Bruce Fortin, John Grubb, Matt Herron, Jack Maslow, Ruth Palmer, Rico Provasoli, Josh Rothenberg, Sam Salkin, Alix Salkin, Jay Vogt, and Angela Winter. Each of you helped make the book wiser and stronger.

Finally, thanks to my wife, Amymy first and best editorfor patiently reading the whole manuscript several times and suggesting improvements large and small that I would never otherwise have discovered.

I was young once, virile, sure of myself, physically powerful, quick witted, confident, and by my own measure, successful. Now I am seventy-eight, en route to seventy-nine. My feet are permanently asleep from neuropathy affecting my balance. In certain instances, my hands tremble. Theres no question of regaining physical vigor or the sexual confidence of my youth. I forget names and occasions with increasing frequency. I am not alone.

My friend and (full disclosure) my Zen teacher for over a dozen years, Lew Richmond, wrote this book for people like me, people being ratcheted forward toward passage on a train that never returns and from which no one escapes. There is a physical element to aging, but the most challenging part may be the mental component. It is this that Lew and this book intend to help us with.

Lew has spent his entire adult life in intimate contact with his own mind. He spent his young manhood living in a Zen Buddhist monastery and went on to found his own software business. During his active career as a Zen teacher, he counseled many people and bore intimate witness to their suffering and confusion. He nearly died in his early fifties and spent weeks in a coma. His recovery took several grueling years. All of which is to assert that he has lived deeply, suffered, and lived to mine the rich veins of wisdom from his experiences.

I cant think of a more perfect person to write a book like this. I have lost track of the number of times during my apprenticeship when Lewalways deeply compassionate, always looking at things clearlydissipated my confusion, anger, and suffering of one sort of another with a few well-chosen words. Five years after our work together drew to a close, I still call Lew from time to time for his valuable clarity, subtlety, and unfailing compassion.