Cuong Lu - Wait: A Love Letter to Those in Despair
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With simple, poetic, and honest prose, Cuong Lu offers indelible wisdom for a life well-lived. We learn about the power of the human experience, in all its sorrows and all its joys, through heartfelt stories and beautifully crafted language. A must-read for anyone wanting to cultivate genuine peace in the heart.
D EVON H ASE , author of How Not to Be a Hot Mess
Cuong Lu has written a down-to-earth book that will soothe and inspire. He speaks as a dear friend, someone who has experienced his share of suffering and has come to see the wisdom of hardships as jewels to cherish. He gives us the gift of no-fear in his encouragement to stop, wait, and study the details of our life, for this is the way to joy. Thank you, Cuong Lu.
S ENSEI J UNE R YUSHIN T ANOUE , cofounder of Zen Life and Meditation Center, Chicago
In a time of worldwide trauma, when it seems raging egos are the norm, Cuong Lu steps forward to remind us of eternal truths. He speaks of the ocean of wisdom that is part of us all, that strength, stability, and inspiration come from within. In every person, we can see a Buddha, an awakening being, he writes. This book is a gift: Cuong Lus generosity and enthusiasm for life is wonderfully infectious, and never has it been better expressed than in Wait.
J OHN O AKES , publisher, The Evergreen Review
Cuong Lu offers a deeply spiritual appeal to refuse to respond to suffering and despair with violence toward ourselves or others. His new book offers simple yet profound insights into the power of waiting and listening as we live with sorrow and pain. His writing invites a reimagining of how we see ourselves and our world and is a gift to those who have beenor soon may beon the complex journey of grief and trauma.
R EV . M ATTHEW C REBBIN , Senior Minister of Newtown Congregational Church, UCC; clergy first responder at Sandy Hook Elementary School
In Wait, Cuong Lu delicately weaves between our external reality and our inner realm, helping us understand how they are interchangeably interwoventhat there is just one universe. He shows that our only mission is to love and that in every moment we have there is an opportunity to exist peacefully. This beautiful book is a keyhole into the important work of understanding the connection between the inner and the outer world.
S HELLY T YGIELSKI , community organizer, self-care activist, trauma-informed mindfulness teacher, founder of Pandemic of Love
An impassioned plea for an end to violence and hatred, this book is full of wise suggestions for how to manage our most difficult emotions. Cuong Lu grew up in Vietnam during the war, and his message to those in despair was hard won and is deeply personal. His love letter speaks to us all. Lu writes, Suffering is not the problem. The way to free yourself from pain is to feel it.
W ES N ISKER , author of Essential Crazy Wisdom and Buddhas Nature
Shambhala Publications, Inc.
4720 Walnut Street
Boulder, Colorado 80301
www.shambhala.com
2021 by Cuong Lu
Wait from Mortal Acts, Mortal Words by Galway Kinnell. Copyright 1980, renewed 2008 by Galway Kinnell. Reprinted by permission of Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. All rights reserved.
You Have to Be Careful from Words Under the Words: Selected Poems by Naomi Shihab Nye, Copyright 1995. Reprinted with permission of Far Corner Books.
Defuse Me from Call Me By My True Names (1999) by Thich Nhat Hanh, with permission of Parallax Press, www.parallax.org. Song of Myself (1892 Version) from Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman. Published by W.W. Norton.
Cover art: Amanda Weiss
Cover design: Amanda Weiss
Interior design: Lora Zorian
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.
Shambhala Publications is distributed worldwide by Penguin Random House, Inc., and its subsidiaries.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Lu, Cuong, 1968 author.
Title: Wait: a love letter to those in despair / Cuong Lu.
Description: First edition. | Boulder, Colorado:
Shambhala, [2021]
Identifiers: LCCN 2020011081 | ISBN 9781611808803
eISBN 9780834843516
(hardcover; alk. paper)
Subjects: LCSH: Suffering. | Despair. | ViolencePrevention. | SuicidePrevention. | Peace of mind.
Classification: LCC BF789.S8 L82 2021 | DDC 155.9/3dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2020011081
a_prh_5.6.1_c0_r0
I grew up in Vietnam. Americans were killing Vietnamese, Vietnamese were killing Americans, and Vietnamese were killing Vietnamese. The bullets hit every Vietnamese family. No one could escape or think, Someone else will be killed, not us.
In 1975, my parents, my big sister, and I were on a huge ship fleeing Vietnam. It was the end of the war, and things were tense. As the ship was about to depart, a bullet that seemed to come out of nowhere hit one of the passengers in the chest. We never saw who shot him, just the piercing of his skin, and he died instantly. To this day, I cannot un-see it. The memory lingers and still disturbs me. The question What is life? stays with me. Why do we humans kill each other?
During the war, one Vietnamese mother was caught by an American soldier. To him, she was a Viet Cong, and he had to kill her. She asked him if she could feed her baby one more time. He agreed. She breastfed the baby, and then he killed her. His belief in love died with him that day. Bullets always hit two people, the shooter and the one shot. This is a common story, with many variations. My wife, who grew up in Vietnam, has told me many painful stories about the war that she witnessed or heard from friends and neighbors.
The bullets flying in the world today will hit every family if we dont stop the violenceand its markedly more out of control in the US, where gun control has been next to impossible. This problem is not about hunting for food or recreation or fending off intruders or invaders. This is about assault weapons available to the young, the unstable, and those who harbor racism and many other forms of hatred, as well as arms exported from developed countries to other nations and as fuel for civil wars and insurgencies. Bullets dont have eyes. They hit those the shooter hates, who invariably are people loved by someone else. If hatred impels you to shoot, bullets will inevitably hit your loved ones too, or at least somebodys beloved. We need to cultivate wisdom, kindness, and activism, and not look the other way. We mustnt confuse defending a treasured way of life or being safe at home with the need for assault weapons. Much gun violence takes place in the homes of gun owners. One day, the weapons will be used, accidentally or on purpose, and someone you love will be struck.
There is war in the streets and in schools, synagogues, mosques, and malls. War has no winners. The bullets hit all parties. The same is true of our inner wars; no one wins. If your mind is at war with yourself, make peace with your mind.
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