Vernaaa Myers - What If I Say the Wrong Thing?: 25 Habits for Culturally Effective People

25 HABITS FOR CULTURALLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE

UNDERSTAND THE ISMS

GET FAMILIAR WITH YOUR BIASES

BE AWARE OF YOUR OWN CULTURE AND HOW IT SHAPES YOUR INTERACTIONS

SEE THE COMMONALITIES BETWEEN PEOPLE

ACCEPT THAT DIVERSITY WILL ACTUALLY LOOK AND SOUND DIFFERENT

LOOK FOR YOUR BLIND SPOTS

SEE ALL CULTURES AS VALID

ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR UNEARNED ADVANTAGES

RESIST ELITISM AND EMBRACE HUMAN VALUE

REAL INCLUSION IS IN THE DETAILS

MAKE THE EFFORT TO REALLY SEE A PERSON

AVOID MICRO-INEQUITIES

CHALLENGE YOUR DESCRIPTIVE BIAS

BECOME MUTUALLY ADAPTIVE

AVOID IN-GROUP FAVORITISM

IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING

DONT BE AFRAID TO ASK

USE YOUR MISTAKES TO GROW

LEARN TO APOLOGIZE

EXPAND YOUR COMFORT ZONE AND PROFESSIONAL AND SOCIAL CIRCLES

COMMIT MICRO AFFIRMATIONS

KEEP YOUR STANDARDS HIGH

APPLY CRITERIA FAIRLY

GET SOME GOOD DIVERSITY TRAINING

BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ANOTHERS SUCCESS

Vern Myers, Esq., principal of Vern Myers Consulting Group, LLC (VMCG), is an internationally recognized expert on diversity and inclusion, specializing in the legal field. Vern is a dynamic speaker and creative advisor in support of creating inclusive environments and improving the recruitment and retention of underrepresented groups. Ms. Myers is well known for her expansive approach to diversity and her belief that inclusion is necessary for people from different cultures, ethnicities, genders, generations, physical abilities, races, sexual orientations, experiences, and backgrounds to thrive in their organizations. When these individuals excel, organizations realize the power of diversity.

VMCG has collaborated with over 100 clients to effect sustainable organizational change by conducting cultural assessments, developing comprehensive strategic diversity action plans informed by her knowledge of cross-cultural competencies, and facilitating compelling and interactive workshops in the United States and around the globe. A highly sought-after speaker at numerous conferences worldwide, Vern sponsors the highly successful annual Opus Conference on Race and Ethnicity in Large Law Firms, and frequently is the keynote speaker at bar and legal association meetings, leadership retreats, womens conferences, and affinity group forums. Vern has worked internationally for a number of global law firms with offices in the United Kingdom, Germany, China, Japan, Singapore, Canada, Sweden, and Russia.

Vern is the author of Moving Diversity Forward: How to Go from Well-Meaning to Well-Doing , published by the American Bar Association in 2011. http://www.movingdiversityforward.com.

In 2010, Pepper Hamilton LLP awarded Ms. Myers its Diversity Champion award. In 2009 she was chosen as one of The Network Journal s 25 Influential Black Women in Business, and in 2008, one of The Massachusetts Lawyers Weekly s Diversity Heroes.

Prior to establishing VMCG, Vern was the first Executive Director of the Boston Law Firm Group, a consortium of firms committed to increasing racial/ethnic diversity. She served as Deputy Chief of Staff for the Attorney General of Massachusetts (199799), where she executed a comprehensive diversity and inclusion initiative: increasing minority recruitment, conducting diversity and sexual harassment trainings, and performing outreach to the states diverse population. Vern practiced corporate and real estate law in Boston for six years at Testa, Hurwitz & Thibeault, LLP and Fitch, Wiley, Richlin & Tourse, LLP.

Vern graduated from Harvard Law School and received a Bachelor of Arts, magna cum laude , from Barnard College, Columbia University. She resides in her hometown of Baltimore, Maryland.

Follow Vern on Twitter @vernamyers or visit her at http://www.vernamyersconsulting.com and movingdiversityforward.com.

Thanks to everyone who has shared with me their stories of triumph and trouble, anxiety, anger, and apology as they travel this worthwhile but sometimes challenging diversity journey. I have taken those stories and my own stumbles to create a book that hopefully offers Habits to smooth out some of the rough patches and keep us moving diversity forward. I would like to acknowledge the great team who helped to make this book possible. I want to thank my wonderful editor, Stuart Horwitz of Book Architecture, for his valuable advice and editing even as he was in the demanding process of having his own book published and released! Congratulations! I also must give my good friend and fellow author, Susanne Goldstein, credit for giving me the idea of a tip book and helping to refine its title and organization. I really appreciate Tim Brandhorst and his team at ABA Publishing for their enthusiastic welcome and support.

Thanks to Amy Allbright and Rye Young for sharing information to improve specific tips for interacting effectively with those in the disability and transgender communities. Thanks to Valerie Batts of Visions, Inc., who first introduced me to a version of the chart on , my unearned one-up groups, and the truth of internalized oppression. I am grateful to Scott Harshbarger for propelling my confidence and career and his willingness to let me use him in the last Habit as an example of what it means to be a true sponsor.

I want to thank my VMCG team. Without their professionalism and dedication, I would not be able to run around the country consulting and also write books. Thanks to the incomparable Jennifer Simpson, who cares deeply about the work of VMCG and getting me to the right place at the right time. Its not an easy job. I appreciate the wisdom of Jane Bermont, our Director of Client Services, that helps me make change by using my gifts in a strategic way. Thanks to Catherine Moore, our great researcher, and all the VMCG consultants who work diligently and hopefully with our clients to create sustainable change. My deepest gratitude also goes to my friend, Sheila Hubbard, for being the one who agrees with me to constantly commit all my endeavors, including this one, to prayer.

This book is not about perfection; it is about overcoming the fear of connection. So I want to thank my familymy mom and dad, sister and brother, nieces and nephews, uncles and aunts, and, of course, my precious son for teaching me that perfect love casts out all fear.

A couple of years ago, I wrote a book called Moving Diversity Forward: How to Go from Well-Meaning to Well-Doing , because so many of my well-meaning friends and clients wanted to put their feet where their hearts were. They wanted to know what they could do to see more diversity in their workplaces and communities and how they could build authentic relationships across race. In Moving Diversity Forward , I discussed in depth the fundamental concepts of diversity and inclusion, examined the barriers to diversity progress, and offered steps that individuals and organizations could take to make a difference.

I created this new tip book as way to keep your diversity journey moving. I wanted to remind you of things we learned in the first book by making the information quick, bite-sized, and accessible. So many people come up to me after a workshop or speech and ask me the What should I do? questions: What if I say the wrong thing, what should I do? What if I am at work and someone makes a sexist joke, what should I say? They are looking to develop the habits of culturally effective people. They are committed to moving diversity forward.