Larry Richards - Be a Man! Becoming the Man God Created You to Be

BE A MAN!

Becoming the Man God Created You to Be

By Father Larry Richards

IGNATIUS PRESS SAN FRANCISCO

Cover art:

Photograph istockphoto / Nick Schlax

Author photo by Paul Lori

Cover design by Roxanne Mei Lum

2009 Ignatius Press, San Francisco

All rights reserved
ISBN 978-1-58617-403-3 (PB)
ISBN 978-1-68149-049-6 (EB)
Library of Congress Control Number 2009924213
Printed in the United States of America

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

We always remember the last words that people say to us before they die, especially the last words of someone we loved. These words resonate throughout our minds and affect our lives in a lasting way. This is especially true of the last words of advice of a loving father to his son. King David knew this as he was talking to his son Solomon and was giving him his final advice before he was to go the way of all the earth. David looks at Solomon and says, Take courage and be a man (1 Kings 2:2 [RNAB]).

David knew that if his son was going to be a great leader, then he would have to first be a great man. This book is about being the kind of man that each of us was created to be. To do this does not require perfection. For David most certainly was not perfecthe was a murderer, an adulterer, and the list goes on; but he was a man who knew who he was and strove with all his being to be better.

Yes, David was weak and filled with many things that we might not respect, but God says of him, I have found in David, the son of Jesse, a man after my heart, who will do all my will (Acts 13:22). Many of us can relate to David (well, at least I know I can!), and from the distant past he encourages us to be men who do Gods will.

In the past forty years or so, you may have noticed that some of the women have become more masculine and some of the men more feminine. Some of us seem to be confused, going against the way we were created: So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them (Gen 1:27). There is a difference! Men are not called to be women and vice versa. This has caused more problems than we can deal with here; but we are differentnot better, but differentand we are called to be fully men!

This book will focus on the biblical perspective concerning what it is to be a man. Therefore, we will use the following for our role models: King David from the Old Testament, St. Paul from the New Testament, and Jesusthe Alpha and Omega of all men.

It is Jesus Christ Himself Who reveals to us what it is to be a man. He was a man for others; He gave Himself away. He challenged people, He loved people, He was strong, and He died for othersand He commanded His disciples to do the same.

And so that is what this book is going to be about. Its about giving away our lives. Its about taking the one life God has given to us and giving it away. What you are being invited to do is to die for others, in the sense of putting others needs above your own. Arent you excited? But to be like Christ, and to be like all the great men, this will cost you your life.

Each chapter ends with tasks that must be accomplished and questions to reflect on and discuss. I would encourage you to read this whole book in its chronological order, for each chapter builds upon the previous one. If you commit yourself now to read the whole book and accomplish the tasks, then I promise you that your life will be changed forever.

So, are you ready? This is not the time to be a wimp. Today the world needs real men! Your family is counting on you; your friends are counting on you; your world is counting on you; your God is counting on youso dont be afraid: take courage and be a man!

CHAPTER 1

Be a Man Who Stays Focused on the Final Goal

Call no man happy before his death, for by how he ends, a man is known.

Sirach 11:28 (RNAB)

You are going to die!

Nice way to start a book, huh? I know, but I want you to let this thought sink in: You are going to die. This is the truest reality there is. This is what makes us all the same. It doesnt matter how rich we are, or how popular we are, or how powerful we are: we are all going to kick the bucket one day Isnt that a nice thought?

Okay, you may say, so what? After we come to accept this basic reality, we have to make sure we do everything with our end in mind. God tells us in the Book of Sirach, Call no man happy before his death, for by how he ends, a man is known (11:28 [RNAB]). The world is filled with examples of men who began well and ended badly! We need to make sure that we are not one of them!

If we keep our end in mind then we can begin to reflect on what is most important: What will I accomplish with my short time on earth? What do I want people to say about me once Ive taken my last breath? Was my life worth living? Will I be a person who changed the world? Will I be a person who gave more than I took? Or will I be a person who took more than I gave? Will people say of me, I loved to be around that man because he was a true man and he gave his life away for others? Or will they say, That person was one of the most miserable human beings you would ever want to meet? What will others say about you?

Recently I had a friend pass away He was seventy years old, and a monsignor in the Catholic Church. He was a large man, and a good man, but he also had a fiery temper. As the bishop preached the funeral homily he said, Monsignor was a man who had a generous heart, and he served the people with all his heartsometimes with a smile, and sometimes with a growl. This man was not perfect, but daily he gave his life away.

What will the people who talk at your funeral say about you?

What we have to do is take some time to sit and meditate about taking our last breath. What do you want your wife to say about you? What do you want your kids to say about you? Or the people you work with? What do you want the people you just met to say? After you take some time in thought and prayer, write down what you want others to say about you and then start to make that your goal. Once youve decided, Okay, when I am taking my last breath this is what I want, you can start living your life with your end goal in mind. You will start living in such a way that when the day of your death happens, the people who know you will say what you want them to say.

I have thought about this a lot in my own life. I was a typical blue-collar family child who grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, with no real religion in my life. My father was a city of Pittsburgh police officer, and my mother also later became a police officer; some thought that I would follow in their footsteps, and in some ways I guess I did.

My mother was Catholic in name, but didnt go to church much. She thought that the Church kept people away from God. She thought, Oh, you do something bad or are in a bad marriage, then you cannot go to church. Although my mother saw the Church as keeping people away from God, it was my father who had the most interesting theology. My dad, my dear father, believed in the God of the Old Testament, the one that gave us the Ten Commandments. He believed that Jesus Christ was Gods Son, but that Jesus changed the rules a little too much. Jesus said, You have heard that it was said, An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I say to you, Do not resist one who is evil.... Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you (Mt 5:38, 39, 44). So my dad believed that although Jesus Christ was the Son of God, God the Father got mad at Him and had Him killed because Jesus changed all the rules. Quite an interesting theology! You think your family was dysfunctional? This is just the beginning of stories about my familywe all come from some kind of dysfunctional family. More on this in the next chapter!

Next page