Lennon - Nothing Happening
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Nothing Happening
by
Lisa Lennon
Lisa Lennon, April, 2018
All rights reserved
Written by Lisa Lennon
Cover illustration by Lisa Lennon
Edited by Julie Rumbarger
Every single little nuance in this appearance cannot be any other way. It is absolutely complete. How can it be a mistake? Any so-called mistake would be a story appearing in this.
~
And suddenly, it's like, Oh yeah, of course!
~
It's funny, it's ironic, that all this time I thought Id been searching for freedom and the irony was, there was never anyone searching and there was never freedom for anyone. It was always here already, overlooked by looking.
Story
The Shift
T here is a seeming shift that happens when a contraction that believes itself to be a somebody, drops away. Everything that I am going to say about it is going to sound contradictory because when speaking in the story happens, the contradiction is that it never happened.
There appears to be a moment when the feeling of being a someone seems to drop. This is not an intellectual happening, it's like a release from the prison of going from a contracted sense of being a me to it being seen that it's always, this.
There seems to be a period or process of leading up to that time that can be really, really painful for the me. What happens is there can suddenly be just what is, (this vast nothing) and then the feeling of losing it and becoming contracted again seems to happen.
What seems to happen is, when the contracted sense of self comes back, there's then a looking for this again. What's seen is that sense of having to look for it again was only what was happening in this; it's just a happening. It can be so energetically strong yet it can't be looked for because it is no thing .
Nothing here knows that. Nothing here knows that there was a me that died. It's an apparent collapse of a feeling of being somebody. It's like having a hood on, and it's taken off. Sometimes experiences can go with that. Here, there was a very strong experience that I didn't know if I was actually alive. I thought I was in some sort of dead limbo land. It was very strong. I'm calling it energetic because it's not like an understanding, it's not understood because there isn't anything to understand. There is no me that knows it's dropped. There is no me that knows it's died. There isn't anything here that can know that it's died. It's simply a shift from the feeling of being me to what is. Just this. It's here before there is any knowing of it. Knowing, is just a happening.
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