Pat Condell - Godless And Free

Title page

Copyright

Copyright Pat Condell 2011

All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy, recording or any other information storage and retrieval system, without prior permission in writing from the author.

First published in 2010 by www.lulu.com

This Kindle edition published in 2011 by Pat Condell

ISBN: 978-0-9568116-0-8

www.patcondell.net

Introduction

A number of people have asked for this book, so here it is. It contains the transcripts of sixty video monologues I posted on the internet between February 2007 and October 2009 because thats the only place they had a hope in hell of being seen.

Ive been trying to say this stuff for years in the traditional media, but criticising religion is frowned on in ultra-sensitive multicultural Britain, especially at the BBC, so I had to be content with talking about it in comedy clubs and fringe theatres until I discovered internet video.

Early in 2007 I was looking for ways to publicise my show, Faith Hope & Sanity A few jokes about religion before it kills us all , when I found something called The Blasphemy Challenge, an atheist campaign that invited people to make a short video of themselves denying the holy spirit (the only unforgivable sin) to show they werent afraid of hellfire.

It seemed like a fun idea, so I made a video in my garden shed and posted it on YouTube. I didnt expect much to come of it, other than perhaps persuading a few people to come and see the show, and I was surprised and delighted to see it rack up thousands of hits in the first few days.

I realised this was a medium I should investigate further, so I made another video, Hello America , which had similar success, and it dawned on me that I could reach far more people like this than by poncing around in small theatres night after night, so I decided to ditch the show and focus on the internet.

Five and a half hours of video and thirty million hits later Im still grateful for the chance to speak my mind to a wider audience without being censored. The novelty hasnt yet worn off, and so far Ive been able to say what I like without interference, although with some censure.

The Trouble with Islam caused a minor ripple in Berkeley, California, in May 2007 when members of the local Peace and Justice Commission (I kid you not) condemned it as racist hate speech, which, in retrospect, and given that it was Berkeley, Ive decided to take as a compliment.

Also, I fell foul of YouTubes notorious flagging policy in October 2008 when they removed Welcome to Saudi Britain for hate speech, because in it I call the country of Saudi Arabia mentally ill, which it very definitely is (and thats being kind).

However, hundreds of YouTube users responded by uploading the video to their own accounts, flooding the site with it. When the National Secular Society (of which I am a member) added its voice to the protest, the press picked up the story, whereupon YouTube promptly reinstated the video. Since then Ive had no problems (though my videos are blocked in Dubai, Im told).

Ive tried to be as reasonable as I can in these videos, but when dealing with religion were faced with the unreasonable, the intolerant, the outlandish and the preposterous, so, if you detect a certain harshness of tone, put it down to the fact that you cant cut through granite with an ordinary drill.

In other words, polite debate and respectful dialogue are wasted on religion, and if thats what youve come here for youre in the wrong place.

Godless and free is what I want to be. I dont think its too much to ask, but, even if it is, Im asking anyway, and Im not taking no for an answer.

I dont expect everyone to agree with me. I know some atheists dislike my videos because they find them too insulting, and well have to agree to differ on that, as I dont think its possible to be too insulting to a religious fundamentalist though Im always willing to try.

Others tell me I shouldnt refer to religion as mental illness, as it demeans people with real mental problems. Well, I think religious people have real mental problems. If you go through life thinking theres something wrong with you because of what Adam and Eve did six thousand years ago, then youre right, there is something wrong with you its called religion.

Most of the mail I get is very positive (though inevitably some isnt, as you can see on my website) and Im grateful for everyones support.

Christians generally agree with me about Islam, while wanting to put me right about God and Jesus. Some Muslims tell me Im right to speak out against Islamism, while others call me a racist. To the white supremacists Im a race traitor. You cant win them all, I guess.

Also, I get a fair amount of abuse from left wing members of the multicultural appeasement lobby who are as blindly religious in their convictions as the Islamist nutcases they support.

These noble egalitarians dont see any irony in making common cause with misogynistic homophobic anti-Semites because they happen to sharerulent hatred of America, yet they seem to expect their opinions to be taken seriously its quite amazing.

In Apologists for Evil I explain how these clowns have poisoned my political outlook and helped to ensure that, though my leftish liberal views are still fairly intact, Ill never vote for a left wing party again.

As for religion, it goes without saying that I believe all gods are imaginary, all prophets are false, and all scriptures are lies.

I also believe that getting your morals from religion is like getting health advice from a tobacco company, and allowing religious sensibilities (especially Islamic ones) to censor free opinion is cultural suicide.

In a nutshell, freedom is my religion and the god of the desert is my Satan. Non-submission, heresy and blasphemy are my sacraments, and anyone whos offended by that can drop dead.

I hope you enjoy this book. In making a video, I prepare what Im going to say in the same way I would a comedy routine, so how it comes out depends on the moment (no, I dont read from a teleprompter thanks for asking); therefore some of this stuff isnt perfect prose. I considered tidying it up, but once you start messing around with a thing theres never any end to it, so Ive left it pretty much as it is.

The transcripts are published in the order they were originally recorded, and are prefaced by the introduction to the Anthology DVD released by the Richard Dawkins Foundation for Reason and Science in April 2008 (the only video that hasnt appeared on the internet) in which I try to explain what Im about. I hope it will serve as a mini introduction to this book as well.

Introduction to Anthology DVD

Released by the Richard Dawkins Foundation, April 2008

Hi everyone. Im Pat Condell. Welcome to this video compilation.

If youve seen me on the internet then you probably know that I really dont care whether God created man or man created God, but I think whichever one was responsible deserves a really good kicking.

People often ask me why I feel the need to be abrasive, even insulting about religion. Well, I dont think I am insulting, quite honestly. I think Im positively emollient, all things considered. But if on occasion I am insulting its because thats the only way I can give religion the respect I think it deserves.

And, although Ive got no special desire to offend anyone, lets be honest, if youre talking about religion and youre not offending people, then youre not really talking about religion, which I believe has shown itself to be completely unworthy as a conduit to higher understanding because it makes no attempt to understand anything. It already has all the answers, and not a single one supported by evidence.