Tim LaHaye - Why You Act the Way You Do

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Why You Act the Way You Do

Copyright 1984 by Tim LaHaye. All rights reserved.

Previously published under the title Your Temperment: Discover Its Potential.

All scripture quotations are taken from the King James Version of the Bible, unless otherwise noted.

Library of Congress Card Number 87-50131

ISBN-13: 978-0-8423-8212-0, Living Book edition

ISBN-10: 0-8423-8212-7, Living Book edition

Printed in the United States of America

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Temperament influences everything you do

from sleep habits to study habits to eating style to the way you get along with other people. Humanly speaking, there is no other influence in your life more powerful than your temperament or combination of temperaments. That is why it is so essential to know your temperament and to be able to analyze other peoples temperaments, not to condemn them, but so you can maximize your potential and enable them to maximize theirs.

When I was in high school, there was a pair of identical twins in my class. We could hardly tell them apart They tested out identically on their IQ scores (128). But that is where the similarities stopped. One was personable; the other withdrew from people. One loved sports, history, and literature; the other preferred math, physics, and language. Interesting to me was the fact that their grade-point averages were almost identical at the end of their four years in high school. Yet they did not get the same grades in most subjects. What made the difference between these young men? Their temperaments!

Temperament influences everything you dofrom sleep habits to study habits to eating style to the way you get along with other people. Humanly speaking, there is no other influence in your life more powerful than your temperament or combination of temperaments. That is why it is so essential to know your temperament and to be able to analyze other peoples temperaments, not to condemn them, but so you can maximize your potential and enable them to maximize theirs.

Sit with me in the counseling room and you will see what I mean. The sanguine talks about the weather, friends, and a hundred things before facing the real problem. The choleric gets right to the point He (or she) wants you to straighten out his partner so he can have a good home life. The melancholy sighs deeply as he sits down with depression, self-pity, and unhappiness etched on his face. The phlegmatic rarely gets around to making an appointment, and when she does it takes most of the first half hour just to prime her conversational pump.

These people are not the temperament they are because they do these things. Rather, they act the way they do because of their temperaments. Some of our acts are subtle, like tastes or preferences, while others involve outlooks and attitudes or even styles of thinking. There is hardly a function in life that is not influenced by temperament Thus, you had better determine your temperament and consistently direct it into the best life-style for you and your family. Otherwise your temperament will subconsciously direct you.

TEMPERAMENT AND EATING HABITS

I can almost judge a mans temperament by his eating habits. Sanguines eat everything in sightand usually look it In a restaurant they so enjoy talking that they almost never look at a menu until the waitress arrives. Cholericsstereotyped eatersseldom vary their menu from one day to the next and when it arrives, they bolt it down in big chunks, often talking while chewing their food. Melancholies are very picky eaters. It takes them forever to make up their minds about what to order, but once it arrives they savor every bite. Phlegmatics are the most deliberate eaters of all and are invariably the last ones through eating. That is the main reason they rarely gain weight (All weight specialists warn obese patients to eat slowly, for it takes twenty minutes for food passing into the mouth to shut off hunger pangs.)

TEMPERAMENT AND DRIVING SKILLS

Sanguines are erratic drivers. Sometimes they speed, then for no apparent reason lose interest in driving fast and slow down. They are so people-oriented that they want to look you in the face when talking, even while driving.

Cholerics are daring speed demons who dart in and out of traffic constantly. They always try to get more accomplished in a given period of time than is humanly possible and attempt to make up time by driving furiously between appointments.

Melancholy motorists never leave home without preparing for the trip well in advance. They study the map and know the best route from A to Z. Of all the temperaments, they are the most likely to keep a complete log of their driving history, including gas and oil consumption and car repairs. Legalists by nature, they rarely speed.

Phil Phlegmatic is the slowest driver of all. The last one to leave an intersection, he rarely changes lanes and is an indecisive danger when joining the flow of freeway traffic from an entrance ramp. He is a pokey Sunday driver seven days a week. He gets few tickets and rarely has accidents, but he can be a road hazard.

TEMPERAMENT AND THE WAY YOU SHOP

Sanguines are not price conscious, but select for visual satisfaction. They are drawn by colorful packaging and advertising In the grocery store, theirs is the most overloaded cart.

Cholerics, particularly men, are not fond of shopping. They only go to the store when they need something and want to purchase it and get out Like sanguines, they usually overbuy but not quite as much.

Melancholies are deliberate and decisive shoppers who compare prices and quality quite carefully. They run their hands over the item, try it on two or three times, leave the store a time or two, and if it isnt sold by the time they return, they buy it They create traffic jams waiting to make up their mind. In the grocery store they know where everything is and save all the coupons from every manufacturer.

Phlegmatics, particularly women, enjoy shopping. They take longer, shop slower, and are probably more frugal than any other type. They are almost as indecisive as the melancholy. They have to shop more frequently than any other type because they dont get enough on the first trip.

TEMPERAMENT AND YARD CARE

As incredible as it may seem, you can almost decipher a persons temperament by the way he does the yard work around his home. Sparky Sanguine gets up early Saturday morning to fix his yard. With great gusto he lines up all his tools (he has every gadget known to man because he totally lacks sales resistance) and prepares to cut, trim, shear, and prune. However, within thirty minutes he is chatting joyfully with a neighbor. Before the day is over, he orders his son to put my tools away and decides to fix the yard next week. Sparky is clearly one of the worlds great procrastinators.

Rocky Choleric hates yard work, and therefore when he does it at all it is with a vengeance. He works at a frenzied pace in order to get the job done, and neatness is not his hallmark. One can usually spot the cholerics yard while driving through the neighborhood. Just look for miniature hedges and dwarf trees.

Martin Melancholy has a natural aptitude for growing things and usually maintains the best yard in the neighborhood. He is the one who talks to and babies his plants, and on almost any weekend we will find him on hands and knees, manicuring his lawns and hedges.

The phlegmatics lawn usually suggests that its owner is still in the house late on a Saturday morning, sipping his third cup of coffeebecause he is. Capable of superior lawn care, Phil will scrupulously attend to the old plantation, however, because his desire to rest is overcome by his drive to do the accepted thing.