Mary E. DeMuth - We Too: How the Church Can Respond Redemptively to the Sexual Abuse Crisis

Too many of our faith communities are not safe places for children and vulnerable people, and they are not safe spaces for the wounded. As a survivor, respected advocate, and prolific writer who loves Jesus and His bride, my dear friend Mary shares why and how to begin the journey of transforming the church into a community that protects the vulnerable and loves the wounded. This book is an invaluable resource that is so needed by todays church. Bravo, Mary!

Boz Tchividjian, attorney, law professor, founder and executive director of GRACE

DeMuths gripping and transparent narrative of her own sexual abuse jolts the readers emotions and ignites the Christians mind. After reading this book, youll be convinced that we too must never again be silent in the face of abuse.

Wade Burleson, author, historian, pastor

The church must do better when it comes to victims of abuse. This call comes not from a critic or a cynic but a lover of the church, an active member of a community of faith. Mary DeMuths book does not merely point out the problems but also explains practical steps for the way forward. If the church follows Marys advice, it will become a place of healing for the wounded and abused.

Glenn R. Kreider, professor of theological studies, Dallas Theological Seminary

Mary DeMuth has written a courageous book about sexual abuse. She rightly calls out churches for their complicity and complete failure to deal with the scourge of sexual violence. She also provides practical advice on what can be done. This book is necessary reading for anyone in Christian leadership.

Rev. Dr. Michael F. Bird, academic dean, Ridley College in Melbourne, Australia

Grounded in biblical truth, sociological research, and survivor stories, this comprehensive book will help readers wisely navigate the complex relationship between grace and truth, justice and forgiveness. Although I grieve that such a book is necessary, I thank God that Mary DeMuth has written it.

Jen Pollock Michel, author of Surprised by Paradox

Mary DeMuths We Too is a timely gift to the church. With compassion and vulnerability, she opens a door into the heart, mind, and soul of sexual abuse survivors. With expertise and clarity, she instructs us in responding to sexual abuse and loving survivors. If every church leader and member took this book to heart, the church would be a safer and healthier place.

Eric Schumacher, pastor, author, and songwriter

In We Too , author Mary DeMuth is at her best. She speaks with the credibility of a survivor and as a well-informed expert. Her book helps readers assure that both their interpersonal relationships and faith communities are places of human flourishing. The church has been needing this resource.

Dr. Sandra Glahn, professor and coauthor of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage

I am grateful for Marys life and her voice. We in the body of Christ need her. Her voice, along with many others, is the voice of our God calling his people into the light of truth and grace; to comfort the brokenhearted and release the captives. Read this book. Let it get inside you. Let it change you.

Diane Langberg, Ph.D., psychologist

Pastors, one of the most important and healing things we can do for survivors is listen. Mary has given us an excellent opportunity to begin listening in a form we are familiar withreading a book. If we read biographies of other great saints (and we should), then let us read biographies of those who have faced one of the great tragedies of our daysexual abuseand maintained a great love for God, the gospel, and the church. Allow reading Marys book to be a first step toward listening well to survivors in your church who need you to be the ears of Christ.

Brad Hambrick, pastor of counseling at The Summit Church (Durham, NC)

This book is a balm to the soul and a resource for the church at large. It is intelligently and discerningly written and initiates a healthy conversation over real and pertinent issues surrounding abuse within the church. #metoo

Vonda Dyer, CCO Minerva Consulting, worship leader, survivor, advocate

Mary DeMuth speaks a powerful and prophetic word that is timely and necessary. She courageously and vulnerably shares her experiences and shows her scars in a way that will embolden many others to do the same. We Too should be required reading for every pastor, church leader, and lay minister.

Rebecca Carrell, speaker, author of Holy Jellybeans and Holy Hiking Boots

In We Too , Mary DeMuth offers a prophetic and winsome call to the church to not repeat the mistakes of the past. She writes as someone who loves the church and is committed to its redemptive mission. We must do better as a church, and Mary helps point the way forward. A must read!

Aaron Graham, lead pastor, The District Church

Mary DeMuths personal story, astute theological applications, and trauma awareness bring clarity to the passivity of the church toward countless men and women bearing the scars of sexual abuse. We Too is painfully necessary and yet filled with the hope of restoration for each person, family, and church affected by sexual abuse.

Brian Haynes, author and lead pastor, Bay Area Church (League City, Texas)

Instead of hearing voices of comfort and support, most abuse survivors experience silence, even from the church. Women deserve to be believed, and the church not only has a great opportunity, but a responsibility to respond.

Susan Seay, author, speaker, and host of the Mentor 4 Moms podcast

We Too is a remarkable and compelling book. Mary DeMuth prophetically calls the church to enter the silence and denial surrounding sexual abuse that has inflicted the body of Christ like a deadly virus. Victims of abuse, their family and friends, and those who shepherd the flock of God will find immense hope and clarity in how we are to find healing for individuals and a restoration of integrity for the church. There could not be a more perfect book for this time.

Dan B. Allender, Ph.D., author, founding president of the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology

Mary invites everyone to the table with We Too an honest, vulnerable, grounded, and biblical addition to the conversation of broken sexuality in the church and society. Its an authentic conversation about where weve been, the challenges we face today, and the hope of healing waiting in our tomorrow.

Antwuan Malone, pastor and executive director of ELEVATE YA

For too long the church has valued its reputation and the reputation of the accused over the safety and healing of the victim. DeMuth wisely shepherds the church toward a true biblical narrative demonstrating Gods care and justice for the oppressed. A must read for every pastor, ministry leader, and Christian counselor.

Leslie Vernick, counselor, speaker, and bestselling author

Mary DeMuth brings wisdom to a difficult topic. She addresses challenges faced by all the groups affected by a single act of abuse, while offering insightful yet simple recommendations to ensure things are handled appropriately.

Ruth Thorogood, Evangelical Fellowship of Canada Partner

Carefully weaving the teachings of Scripture with her own story and the stories of others who have suffered sexual abuse, Mary DeMuth delivers a powerful wake-up call to the church she loves. Filled with biblical wisdom, factual evidence, and practical principles, We Too is an indispensable resource for anyone who cares about those who have been broken by sexual sin.

Bob Rognlien, author of A Jesus-Shaped Life

Mary DeMuth has a message that the church needs to hear. We Too is a transparent, thoughtful, raw, and honest account of a problem in the church that no one wants to talk about. But we must. We Too deserves to be widely read by women and men, leaders and laity. Dont miss it.

Kim Jones, director of engagement, My Refuge House