Dave Furman - Being There: How to Love Those Who Are Hurting

addiction,

Anyabwile, Thabiti,

biblical counseling,

bitterness,

Bohlin, Sue,

Bonar, Horatius,

Bonhoeffer, Dietrich,

Calvin, John,

Chalmers, Thomas,

Chandler, Matt,

Chester, Tim,

chronic pain

asking the why questions,

hope in the midst of,

ministering in helpful ways,

ministering to nonbelievers,

church

as caregiver for the hurting,

confronting sin in,

leadership in,

membership in,

nature of,

restoration in,

Clowney, Edmund,

creation,

Croft, Brian,

cross-cultural ministry,

David,

death,

depression,

Dever, Mark,

Dunlop, Jamie,

fasting,

fear,

felt needs,

Flavel, John,

forgiveness,

friendship

and confronting sin,

expressing encouragement in,

grieving with,

hurtful approaches to,

promises of prayer,

resisting self-centeredness in,

in times of suffering,

true fellowship in,

Gilbert, Greg,

God

communion with,

faithfulness of,

glory of,

image of,

love of,

mercy of,

power of,

presence of,

promises of,

saving work of,

sovereignty of,

trusting in,

will of,

Word of,

wrath of,

grace,

grieving,

healing,

holiness,

Holmes, Jonathan,

Holy Spirit,

hope,

humility,

hypocrisy,

idolatry,

Jesus

atonement of,

comfort in affliction,

death and rejection of,

finding identity in,

proper worship of,

relationship with,

as suffering servant,

Job,

Joshua,

Kell, Garrett,

Keller, Tim,

Kidner, Derek,

lamentation,

Lane, Timothy S.,

law,

Lewis, C. S.,

listening,

Machen, J. Gresham,

marriage,

MCheyne, Robert Murray,

Miller, Paul,

OBrian, Peter,

Ortlund, Ray,

pain. See

persecution,

Pierre, Jeremy,

Powlison, David,

prayer,

pride,

prosperity gospel,

psalms of lament,

Rainer, Thom,

redemption,

Reju, Deepak,

repentance,

resurrection,

Roberts, Vaughn,

salvation,

sin,

Sittser, Jerry,

small group Bible study,

social anxiety,

spiritual disciplines,

spiritual gifts,

Spurgeon, Charles,

suffering

in brokenness,

with disability,

finding comfort in,

as identity,

redemption from,

Thomas Kempis,

Thorn, Joe,

Tripp, Paul David,

Vincent, Milton,

widows,

Wiersbe, Warren,

Wright, H. Norman,

Several years ago my pain was so bad that my wife reached out to a world - famous doctor in the United States one night over email. To her surprise, he emailed back immediately and let her know that he was opening a clinic in Dubai and that a couple of his protgs would be in Dubai the following week. What are the odds of that? We arranged to meet the doctors in their new clinic here in our city, and they did a comprehensive exam. We asked about the available treatment options they could recommend over here, and they asked back, Why dont you have surgery with us next week? This scenario seemed too good to be true, and we saw Gods hand all over it, so -to-speak. Our health insurance miraculously came through at the last possible moment, so I was all set.

We arrived at the hospital with high hopes that this surgery would provide relief for my incredibly painful nerve disorder. I quickly changed into my hospital gown, and I was hooked up to the IVready to go. The problem was that no one else was ready for me. Over the course of the day, my surgery kept being postponed hour after hour. Then we were told that we were cutting it close to even have the surgery, because the anesthesiologist on duty was due to head home soon, and the chief surgeon had a flight to catch to leave the country. Apparently the doctors had been delayed due to a difficult surgery that was taking longer than expected, and we anxiously stared at the clock and prayed that my surgery would actually happen.

Finally, eight hours after we arrived at the hospital, I was rolled down to the operating room. I was nervous, but really excited that the surgery was going to happen. I couldnt wait to get some relief at the hands of these amazing physicians who said that I might be shaking hands and playing tennis in no time. I waited outside the operating room for an hour filled with hope because at the time I could hardly use my arms at all.

But then it happened. The doctor emerged from the operating room in his scrubs and told me the devastating news: my surgery was cancelled. There was not enough time or personnel to do the surgery that night, and he was leaving for the airport to head back home. He told me he might be back in a few months. Maybe. I was shattered.

As if things couldnt get any worse, the doctors left me alone downstairs for another hour outside the operating room. I was all alone, connected to an IV I didnt need, next to an operating room I would never enter, with no prospect of healing. I was afraid. I felt abandoned. I even let out a loud scream of frustration that apparently no one heard. I had banked my hope on getting relief from the pain and being as good as new. The doctors had said there was an 85 percent chance of total healing, but now with what looked like a 0 percent chance, I was devastated. I had placed my hope in healing, and now that was gone. I had no hope.

Forgetting Jesus

In my hospital bed I had forgotten that my hope is ultimately not in having arms without pain, but in having Jesus. The apostle Paul understood problems like mine, andin the book of Galatianshe wrote to the church about his fear that they were departing from the truth of the gospel to have hope in something else. He was baffled that they would do this. Paul wrote to them, Who has bewitched you? It was before your eyes that Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified (3:1). The Galatians were treating the cross as one belief among many in their religion. The cross became incidental and not central. They were putting their works ahead of the most monumental display of love in the history of the world. They were brushing it aside to live according to the law and Paul said it was like they had been bewitchedbrainwashed and operating like an insane person who cant think clearly.

Paul reminded them that it was before their very eyes that Christ was portrayed as crucified. Of course the Galatians had not actually seen the crucifixion take place. They lived far from Palestine, and some time had passed since Christs death. So what does Paul mean? Notice it doesnt say they saw Christ crucified but that he was portrayed as crucified. This is the idea of something being held up on a sign for everyone to see. Paul is telling them: Galatians, dont you remember all my preaching to you about Christ? I wasnt just teaching facts or lecturing; I was heralding. I was holding up graphically and vividly the crucifixion. I was bringing the crucifixion from a past event to a present reality. The Galatians werent physically present at the crucifixion, but through his preaching Paul brought this past event and its effect into their everyday experience.

Paul showed them the cross. They saw Christ crucified portrayed before their own eyes and made simple for them to understand. It was as if Paul had printed a sign and put the words in capital letters and stuck it up to their faces so they couldnt miss it. It was like a billboard in their town center that said Christ Alone = Salvation.

Heres what is frightening and sobering. The Galatians knew the truththey were told the truth, they understood the truthbut then they forgot it. So too, my fundamental problem outside that hospital operating room wasnt that my arms didnt work and they werent going to get better. It was that I forgot my hope isnt in whether I can play tennis or hold my baby, but in Christ alone. In the midst of my pain I needed someone to remind me of this truth.