Leonard Felder - Here I Am: Using Jewish Spiritual Wisdom to Become More Present, Centered, and Available fo r Life

This book will help people. Dr. Felder finds useful responses to modern problems in ancient wisdom.

Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People

Dr. Leonard Felder has a marvelous talent for illuminating profound wisdom teachings in a way that readers can understand personally and bring into their lives to nurture and deepen their own spiritual practices.

Rabbi David A. Cooper, author of God Is a Verb

For many years Ive been seeking a way to be centered and calm during the stressful moments that often fill my busy days. Each time Ive tried something, I am hopeful at first, but then I am often disappointed by the lack of results over time. So it has been a wonderful surprise and delight that Dr. Felders easy-to-use book has given me a new level of calm and strength that Ive never known. This book is a gift; the effectiveness of these mindfulness methods have continued to help me day after day, long after I first explored the chapters and tried out the sacred remedies he describes.

Connie Goldman, award-winning producer and writer for National Public Radio

Here I Am is a very enjoyable and valuable guide that shows how Jewish spirituality can help us cope with those moments of intense stress that are part of every life. I am particularly grateful that so much wisdom has been gathered together in one place in this book, and I will be recommending Here I Am to many people and with much enthusiasm!

Rabbi Sally J. Priesand, first ordained woman rabbi

Here I Am is a breath of restorative fresh air. Breathe it in. Ive used Dr. Felders incredibly practical ideas to find calm amidst the everyday storms.

David Nathan Weiss, Oscar-nominated screenwriter of Shrek 2

ABOUT THE BOOK

During stressful times, its easy to get caught up in feeling anxious, tense, foggy, and overloaded. Here, a popular psychologist shares easy-to-use techniques for managing and rebalancing these emotions and helps you to find your calm, strong center. Dr. Leonard Felder draws from his work with clients over the last thirty years, and incorporates traditional Jewish prayers and blessings that have been used for centuries to refocus the mind. The author has a long history of multi-faith counseling and dialogue and has made these stress-management practices resonant with people of all religious backgrounds who are looking for more awareness, clarity, and calmness when faced with stress-related emotions.

In this book youll learn how to:

• Regain your equilibrium when you feel pulled in too many directions
• Outsmart your moody, anxious brain
• Know when to intervene and when to let go in a situation
• Respond with wisdom when someone treats you harshly
• Find inner quiet and peace when you feel agitated
• And much more

In each chapter, Felder includes examples drawn from his clients experiences and explanations from mind-body psychology and neuroscience to support the effectiveness of this kind of mindfulness practice.

LEONARD FELDER, PhD, is a licensed psychologist in West Los Angeles who has written twelve books on personal growth that have sold over one million copies. He leads discussions and workshops throughout the country at both synagogues and churches, and numerous interfaith events. He has also appeared on over 200 radio and television programs, including Oprah, The Today Show, CNN, The CBS Early Show, NBC Nightly News, National Public Radio, Canada AM, and BBC London.

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Here I Am

Using Jewish Spiritual Wisdom to

Become More Present, Centered,

and Available for Life

LEONARD FELDER, PHD

TRUMPETER Boston 2011

Trumpeter Books

An imprint of Shambhala Publications, Inc.

Horticultural Hall

300 Massachusetts Avenue

Boston, Massachusetts 02115

trumpeterbooks.com

2011 by Leonard Felder

Cover design by Jim Zaccaria

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Felder, Leonard.

Here I am: using Jewish spiritual wisdom to become more present, centered, and available for life/Leonard Felder.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references and index.

eISBN 978-0-8348-2751-6

ISBN 978-1-59030-844-8 (pbk.: alk. paper)

1. Self-actualization (Psychology) 2. Self-actualization (Psychology)Religious aspectsJudaism. 3. Stress management. 4. Spiritual lifeJudaism. 5. Self-help techniques. I. Title.

BF637.S4F427 2011

296.7dc22

2011000480

For my niece Erica Helene Ruff who is a bit curious about Jewish spirituality.

I hope this book will help you nourish your beautiful soul and deal with the many daily stresses in your life.

Sometimes in this book you will see Hebrew words that may be unfamiliar. Please dont worry. I will spell them out phonetically in English, and you can sound them out as they appear on the page.

The only confusing words are those that contain ch. For instance, the word Shechinah is a mystical term that refers to the in-dwelling Presence of the Divine (which some scholars call the feminine aspect of the One). Rather than saying this word with a ch sound as in chew or child, you instead use a clearing-your-throat sound, as when you say the familiar words chutzpah (bold nerve or entitlement), challah (the special braided bread for the Sabbath), or lichayim (as in to life, to life, lichayim from Fiddler on the Roof).

If you arent comfortable yet making the ch sound as described here, please dont sweat it. You can pronounce any unfamiliar words in your own style and still benefit enormously from the techniques and insights contained in these eight chapters.

EVERY SO OFTEN, its a good idea to sit down and ask yourself, How am I going to improve the way I deal with the pressures, complexities, and stressful moments that are now an undeniable part of my life?

Such a question doesnt mean that youve been doing something terribly wrong or that you need to turn your entire life upside down to improve things. Rather, its about being honest with yourself and looking for realistic ways to be healthier, more centered, and more effective in your work and personal life. Its about asking the right questions and coming up with the most satisfying and effective solutions. For example, you can start by trying to answer the following questions:

• Is my daily schedule more demanding and overloaded than it used to be?
• Do I feel that Im usually rushing faster or trying harder but still falling behind?
• Do I sometimes feel pulled and twisted, like a frayed rubber band on the verge of snapping, because unresolved situations in my life are tugging at me with more and more intensity?
• Is it hard to find a balance between being extremely productive and having enough time and energy to enjoy the less driven, more intimate moments of life?
• Is there someone I care about deeply who is also feeling overstressed or unable to breathe because of too much recent pressure?

In the past few decades, many approaches, workshops, therapies, and books have been devoted to the topic of stress. Some of them are quite good, but they usually require that you make large investments of time and money, as well as major lifestyle changes, and that you follow a huge number of meticulous steps and procedures (for which most busy people dont have the time or patience).