Copyright Page
2016 by Kimm Crandall
Published by Baker Books
a division of Baker Publishing Group
P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 495166287
www.bakerbooks.com
Ebook edition created 2016
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meansfor example, electronic, photocopy, recordingwithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.
ISBN 978-1-4934-0487-2
Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version (ESV), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ESV Text Edition: 2011
Scripture quotations labeled Message are from THE MESSAGE. Copyright by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
Scripture quotations labeled NLT are from the Holy Bible , New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations labeled NKJV are from the New King James Version. Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
The author is represented by the literary agency of Wolgemuth & Associates, Inc.
Some names and details have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals involved.
Endorsements
Life is a mess of our sin and suffering, but thankfully God meets us with his redeeming grace. Instead of judgment and rejection, he offers love and acceptance. Kimm unpacks the wonder of Gods mercy with honesty and courage and shows how it reaches all the way down to every dimension of our hearts and lives.
Justin S. Holcomb, professor at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, author of On the Grace of God
What a refreshing book! Beloved Mess is funny, arresting, radical, and best of all, true. Sometimes I think we Christians have missed the main thing about our faith: Were great sinners and Jesus is a great Savior. That means that were free, forgiven, acceptable, and loved. If that doesnt make you want to dance, laugh, and sing, youre dead and just havent been buried yet. Read this book and give it to all your friends. Well laugh, sing, and dance together.
Steve Brown , broadcaster, seminary professor, and author
In Beloved Mess , Kimm pours out her heart with a gospel urgency and authenticity that brings you to your knees in praise of Gods glorious grace. There is no faking it or tidying up of her story. She believes Gods love for each of us in our mess is the most beautiful thing we can behold, and she puts it on full display. Read this short but life-changing book, go back to it again and again, and see yourself falling more in love with the One who loved us and gave himself for us.
Jessica Thompson, author of Everyday Grace
Tired of performance-based, score-carding, joy-sabotaging, heart-deflating spirituality? Me too. My friend Kimm Crandall gives voice to the longing of our hearts for less posing and more reposing in the outrageous riches of Gods grace. Beloved Mess underscores that it is our belovedness in Jesus which frees us from our navel-gazing fixation with ourselves and leads us into a life of living and loving to the glory of God. Kimm has reminded me afresh that it was never about the victorious Christian life, but about the victorious Christ. Its precisely because God cannot love us any more than he already does in Christ that we can think less often about ourselves, and more often about extending his mercy and grace to others.
Scotty Ward Smith , teacher in residence at West End Community Church, author of Every Season Prayers
Kimm Crandall couldnt hide her mess if she tried, and its the most beloved thing I know about her. Kimm, in life and in this book, displays her glorious need for the gospel and its good grace. She clings to the cross and teaches her readers how to live with vulnerability toward Christ and others. Its a refreshing mess if I ever saw one.
Lore Ferguson Wilbert , director of community and formation at Park Church, Denver, writer at Sayable.net
Dedication
To my husband, Justin:
my best friend, fellow grace moocher, and dance floor virtuoso.
Thank you for loving me as I am.
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Copyright Page
Endorsements
Dedication
Foreword by Elyse Fitzpatrick
Introduction
1. Im a Mess
2. The League of the Guilty
3. The Imposter, Myself, and I
4. An Exposure That Leads to Freedom
5. Romans 8:1 on Repeat
6. Stubborn Grace
7. Doubt Is Not a Dirty Word
8. Living in Our Belovedness
9. Kissed by Grace
Appendix: Gospel Truths for the Beloved
Acknowledgments
Notes
About the Author
Back Ads
Back Cover
Foreword
Kimm Crandall is a friend of mine. But its not always been that way. There was a time when Kimm didnt really like me and because, like her, I thrive on acceptance and sensed her displeasure, Im not sure I liked her either. But thankfully all of that has changed.
There was a time when I thought and spoke almost exclusively about how to be good. I even wrote about how to get better at being good. But then grace came crashing into my life. Not because I had some great fall into unspeakable immorality and knew that I couldnt get betterno, actually I thought I was getting better. I thought I was excelling, doing my best, being faithful and obedient, and I knew how to tell other people how to be like me. Unlike others who talk about grace, I didnt go through one of those darkened-room, curled-up-in-the-fetal-position experiences. No, what I went through was something less dramatic, more gradual, but utterly Copernican in its transformation. It was a slow stripping away of my self-righteousness and self-confidence, a reorienting of my life away from my own perceived goodness and toward Jesuss perfection.
Heres how it went: In the church I was attending, I had friends (one in particular) who kept harping on me and telling me that I was already pleasing to God, that I really wasnt living in light of the gospel by focusing on how to be good. But I didnt immediately embrace the wonder of grace like someone who had found lost treasure. No, I resisted it. I went kicking and screaming down that road. Grace? Freedom? Rest? Love? No way! Not me! I am a serious Christian, a serious theologian. I have a Masters degree in biblical counseling for crying out loud! I cant tell you how angry these gospel people made me. You think I dont understand the gospel? You think I dont live in the light of grace? How dare you! These were thoughts that, like little pieces of sand, stuck in my heart and maddened and irritated me until Jesus finally formed a gospel pearl. His message of love began to wear down my resistance to it, to him, until I began to see beauty and love and yes, grace.
Eventually I found myself hungry to seriously investigate what these gospel people were talking about, and I wrote Because He Loves Me , and that, as they say, was pretty much the end of the story. I became aware of how self-righteous, angry, critical, and demanding I was. I knew that I didnt really love people and that the gifts of insight and wisdom Jesus had given me had been used by me for self-promotion and harshness. The light began to dawn. I was in great need of grace, and all the more so because I didnt think I was.