Kim Duke - A Fine Mess

p. 47: London, England during the Blitz of WWII. Photo of woman drinking from a cup. Reprinted by permission of Royston Leonard/mediadrumimages. All rights reserved. Edited by Darby OShaughnessy Illustrated by Rosario Soley
A FINE MESS Copyright 2020 Kim Duke All rights reserved.

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Published by BHC Press Library of Congress Control Number: 2018948477 ISBN: 978-1-64397-097-4 (Hardcover) ISBN: 978-1-947727-76-2 (Softcover) ISBN: 978-1-948540-30-8 (Ebook) For information, write: BHC Press 885 Penniman #5505 Plymouth, MI 48170 Visit the publisher: www.bhcpress.com
For Carol S. and Evelyn R.
You made a difference . About the Author

Kim Duke is an international writer known for her easy and witty style when talking about tough stuff.

Shes been covered by Cosmopolitan , NBC News, CTV, and CBC and her work has been featured on The Globe and Mail and the internet sensation, Medium.com .
She lives in Alberta, Canada with her husband and werewolf dog. Find her online at her website: thecomplicatedsimple.com

Youre reading this book, which means that someway, somehowyouve had your world blown apart.
Youre shocked, confused, enraged, embarrassed, guilty, insecure, depressed, ashamed, fearful, grief-stricken, humiliated. Youre frozen, lost, sad or numb, alone, in a fog, in denial just to mention a few off the top of my head.
There are so many ways to experience disaster, arent there? What has set you back?
Crushed you ?
Flattened you like a f*#%ing pancake?




Do you fantasize about how to make your great escape?
Plane, train, automobile, horse, tank, motorcycle, boat, submarine, blimp, bicycle, kite, hot-air balloon, skate, rocket, get-away car, helicopter, parachute, scuba dive, zip-line, swim, ski, swing like Tarzan, run away to the circus, magically disappear, hide, dig, fly?
My favorite escape fantasy was wishing I could hop into a time-machine.

Fine Messes have the common thread of being accidental journeys.

Fine Messes have the common thread of being accidental journeys.

No one ever intends to end up in A Fine Mess. No one wakes up in the morning, yawns, and says, Today looks like a perfect day to get into A Fine Mess. Fine Messes are conniving. And they have dreadful manners.
They like to circle around and push your face in the mud when youre not looking.
Or when youre in its surreal, alien aftermath.
Or when youre in its surreal, alien aftermath.

But hope is waiting in the wings.

There have been a few Fine Messes in my life. But by far, the biggest and nastiest happened a few weeks after I visited the Tate Britain Museum in London, England. I was at the museum with a client, and we were goofing around and laughing at a ridiculously huge ass sculpture that had just won a famous 100,000 prize ($130,000).

Two weeks after I flew home to Canada, I received a breast cancer diagnosis, only a month after I turned fifty.
I went from living my beautiful life to: having both of my breasts removed; spending twenty days a month for five months bald and sick in bed from chemotherapy; and then twenty days of having my chest wall blasted with radiation.
I went from living my beautiful life to: having both of my breasts removed; spending twenty days a month for five months bald and sick in bed from chemotherapy; and then twenty days of having my chest wall blasted with radiation.

I practically lit up in the dark.
I was devastated, and so was everyone around me. My lovely aunt had also been diagnosed with cancer a few months earlier, so my family felt like we had stepped on a land mine.
I was trapped in hell, and some days I thought I would never find my way out.
But I did. I am alive.

Scarred, but alive.
I dont look the same . I dont feel the same.
Some days I think people should call me Franken-Kim.
But I still love life so very, very much. No, I am not the same person I was before.

Why?
Because every time a profound event happens in your life, that experience carves you.
And the deeper the experiencethe deeper the carving.

I have no idea what youre going through.