Sandra J. Harden - In the Midst Of It All

IN THE MIDST OF IT ALL

WRITTEN BY:

SANDRA J. HARDEN

FOREWORD BY: PASTOR JAMES HARDEN

Copyright 2021 Sandra J. Harden

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed Attention: Permissions Coordinator, at the address below.

ISBN: 978-1-7364457-4-7 (Paperback)

978-1-7364457-5-4 (E-book)

Library of Congress Control Number:

Book Cover Design by Prize Publishing House

Printed by Prize Publishing House, LLC

in the United States of America.

First printing edition 2021.

Prize Publishing House

P.O. Box 9856

Chesapeake, VA 23321

www.PrizePublishingHouse.com

Dedication

I dedicate this book to honor my grandmother, Viola Polk, who taught me the greatest thing in the world: love and look to the hills from whence cometh my help.

To my husband, Pastor James R. Harden, for believing

in my vision.

To my son, RyJaeh, who pushed me to press my way to do anything I put my mind to.

To my mother, Barbara, for birthing me to be the woman

I am today.

FOREWORD

Follow my example as I follow the examples of Christ. 1 Corinthians 11:1

I have never been more honored than I am at this moment to be able to write this for my beautiful wife. When my wife, First Lady Sandra Harden, asked me to write this foreword for her, I was truly happy to do it. I have such high respect for this woman of God because she has shown such integrity and standards in life. I am overjoyed to lend my thoughts, time, and solemn words to such a great project.

As I watched her time after time get out of the bed and put her thoughts to paper, I began to think about the conversations and the laughter that we have shared throughout our time together. As I continue to think and sit there, I start to reminisce over the fact that words can not express the unworthiness I feel to be writing the foreword for this great mother, mentor, counselor, and friend . Just know the author of this great manuscript has truly laid and labored before God to share and impart into the millions of people that will read this great manuscript entitled, In the Midst of It All. There are no words to describe the power and healing virtue to be revealed in the pages of this book. It will mentally, emotionally, and spiritually inspire you and all who read it. It is truly going to captivate your heart and mind. Get ready for In the Midst of It All!!!

In Christ Jesus.

-Pastor James Harden

CONTENTS

Introduction

Have you ever sat in a quiet place and talked to yourself out loud? Where do I go from here? How did I allow myself to get so low and so depressed? How could I have done things so differently? My life is a total mess and, the road I am traveling, I dont know how to fix it.

This point in my life is very scary. I knew I needed to remove myself from toxic people. I was repeating the cycle over and over. The more I tried to get out, the deeper I got into this situation. Who can I turn to for help?

The irony of this title is that in the midst of it all, I choose joy. When you see someone in the midst of all kinds of things, your faith is tested and tried. I had to remember the scripture Psalm 30:5, Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. I kept knocking on doors that needed to be closed. I had to gain confidence in myself and have the assurance that I can make it. It is not because of anything that I have done, but because of Gods grace and how He loves me in spite of. God will be with you through it all. God fights the battles even when you do not have the strength to fight.

Finally, I am thankful that the Lord was there to keep me. In the midst of it all, there is nothing too hard for God.

I grew up in a single-parent home. I always knew who my dad was, but he did not live in the same house, so I lacked a father figure. I lacked the little girl who wanted her daddy nearby to call her princess, so I grew up trying to find love in relationships. I thought because a guy called me pretty, he loved me. No, he used me.

Experiencing one relationship after another, I finally found the one to love me, so I married him because of the love. I was deeply in love listening to my grandmother talk about marriage. I was so excited to be a wife. I just knew it would work. I was wrong. He began to cheat. I thought I had lost my mind. How can this happen to me when I have bragged to my friends how much in love I was? I was a hot mess at this point. I thought I had lost my mind, but his cheating taught me the true love I desired.

In the midst of the hurt, I had to watch my husband and a child with another woman. This was the worst thing I ever had to endure. I was lost and wanted to die. After all I have done , this is happening to me. I felt as if I was suffering. I still had to face people.

Years later, we divorced. I was devastated because all I knew was hurt. What were happiness and joy, and how do I get it? I was raised in the church , attending Sunday School and Bible Study. My

grandma kept me there, but I was still not thinking about being saved. I wanted to get past all the hurt. Every person I came in contact with hurt me, so my heart grew bitter , and I hated myself for being so stupid. I was struggling from day to day. I had to figure this out on my own how to change to be a better person and stop men from giving me that sweet talk, and I fall for it every time. I deserved better, but how? I cried out. I need help. Bring me back to the person I once knew.

I moved on, then here came the lustful eye and the sweet talk. Then came stupidity and life going to hell in a handbasket. I thought, What kind of example am I setting for myself, but I turned to a married man for comfort because of hurt. Now, this was the biggest mistake of my life. It cost me my character. It cost my name to be destroyed. I lived with that for years. I had to get my life in order. I decided if I do not turn my life back into the hands of a man that I know will not hurt me, I will die from something, and it will not be pretty.

One Sunday morning, I got up, and I was determined to go to church. The preacher spoke the message, Im Not That Way Anymore, and the altar call was open to anyone that wanted to give their life to Christ. Come just as you are wounded, hurt, sick, and in pain. I sat there. Everyone else was going, and I sat there. The preacher asked, Is there one? I found my legs shaking. I felt all the things I had done. I got up and made my way down to the altar and lifted my hands. I screamed and yelled for the Lord to save me. The preacher prayed, and I felt myself getting lighter. Burdens and weights were being lifted. After being saved that day, I still was not totally sold out for Jesus. I was a babe in Christ, but I was determined not to see the old life that I lived again.