Pleasant Surprise - Body Language: Actions Speak Louder than Words

Body Language Actions speak louder than words 80% physical, 20% verbal, body language offers clues to a persons true state of mind Body language offers clues to the state of mind of a person without him or her having to tell you. Being able to read people reliably (understand their body language) helps you interpret and interact with them more successfully, whether theyre telling the truth or lying through their teeth. Baseline read is vital Baseline refers to the way a person interacts with the world when he or she is in a relaxed, undefiled state. Remembering the way they act normally helps you compare what changes when theyre under duress: uncomfortable questions or statements, accusations, or when theyre trying to conceal something. To develop a baseline assessment, youll pose neutral questions about uncontroversial subjects. EYES While youre asking questions, or the other person is remembering things, its vital to note which directions they look. EYES While youre asking questions, or the other person is remembering things, its vital to note which directions they look.

When a relaxed right-handed person looks up and to the left, it indicates theyre imagining or constructing an image or an idea. When they look up and to the right, theyre remembering. When looking immediately to the left, theyre creating a sound in their head. When looking immediately to the right, theyre recalling a sound. Looking down and to the left, they recollect a feeling, a taste, or a smell. When looking down to the right, they talk to themselves.

Did you notice? Every time the eye went to the left side, the individual was constructing or imagining something; whenever it went to the right side, the individual was remembering something. For left-handed people often the reverse is true. Eye dilation is also a key. When eyes dilate, were watching something that excites us or propels us: people, places, objects, images, ideas, lying. While creating a baseline, notice the individuals blinking rate. When it increases, the individual is lying or very anxious.

When it decreases, the individual is getting bored. Eyes looking at lips means theres a sexual attraction. FEET Also notice the direction of their feet. People place their feet in the direction they want to go: toward the exit or toward a person of interest. When a persons legs are crossed and their foot is fidgeting, theyre bored or counting the seconds with each bounce. HANDS What individuals do with their hands helps you discern what theyre thinking or feeling. HANDS What individuals do with their hands helps you discern what theyre thinking or feeling.

When theyre standing with their hands clasped in front of them, theyre in a closed position, hugging their own bodies for support. When they scratch their heads, theyre trying to stimulate their brain and think harder than usual. When they put put their hands in their pockets, theyre of no use and cant (literally) give you a hand. When the opposite sex crosses their hands in front of their genitalia, it means theyre not interesting and are unavailable. HEAD Leaning theirs head and neck to 12:30 oclock reveals that the individual is sensitive; leaning forward with the neck means they think theyre smart. When individuals lean with their necks back, theyre suspicious.

Moving their head to 1 oclock normally means an individual is trying see things from a different point of view, or that theyre interested. Moving the head forward with the neck means theyre in your face and in your way. Leaning it backward with the neck means Youre crazy. When they lean their head to 2 o clock it normally means they want to be on the same level with the other person. If they move their neck forward, it means they think the other person is crazy or psycho. NOSE The nose reveals only bad emotions.

When nostrils flair, an individual is breathing in more oxygen to cool down, so if you notice nostrils flair, be ready. A nose wrinkle can indicate disgust or repulsiveness. CHIN Moving the chin up raises the nose and indicates that the individual feels he or she exists at a higher level than you. If the chin is lower, it means shamefulness or pity. HOW YOU COME ACROSS TO OTHERS When meeting with people, its important to look at them (or in their direction) head on without tilting your head to the left or right. If you do, youll look more attractive, because the other person can clearly see the symmetry of your face.

The brain is very lazy; this is why it labels attractive or beautiful people (those with more symmetrical faces) okay to approach because it cant discern any fault in them. The less fault it sees, the more attractive and beautiful the person seems. Create Rapport One of the most important aspects of understanding body language and using it in your own life is building rapport. Rapport is another way of saying that a person likes you and feels comfortable around you. Rapport is important because if people like you, theyll feel more comfortable helping you, listening to you, and doing things for you even if they dont like doing them. One great way of creating rapport is by mirroring the other.

Whenever youre interacting with anyone, notice what position theyre in. Are their hands folded, their legs crossed? Then notice your position. Youll quickly discover that sometimes your body language will mirror each others, especially when youre in an interesting conversation. Whenever you are in a situation like that, change your position slightly to see if the other person mirrors you. If they do, theyre interested in you and are subconsciously paying attention and creating rapport. Try creating fake body mirrors to see if the other person is interested and paying attention.

You can even do this from another side of the room to quickly gauge who is paying attention to you from afar. You can also show interest in another person by mirroring their moves. They wont realize it, but youll create more comfort for them. Mirroring is the fastest way to create rapport. MICRO-EXPRESSIONS Micro-expressions are the most difficult to read, because they happen very quickly, but theyre the most helpful because the user has no intention of making themthey do it subconsciously and cant disguise them. Examples: blinking more, unusual levels of eye contact, unusual movements.

The most common micro-expressions reveal anger, contempt, fear, disgust, joy, sadness and surprise. Happiness reveals crows feet wrinkles, pushed up cheeks, and movement from the muscle that orbits the eye. Sadness is exposed via drooping upper eyelids, loss of focus, and a slight pulling down of the corners of the lips. Anger is expressed via lowered eyebrows, by squinted, glaring eyes, and by a narrowing of the lips. Disgust is shown by wrinkling the nose and raising the upper lip. Fear is shown when upper eyelids are raised.

Contempt is expressed when the corners of lips tighten and rise on only one side of the face. Surprise: eyebrows raised, eyes widened, mouth open. Remember these reactions last only 1/25 of second. Youll have to train yourself to watch for these movements to get accurate reads. Our bodies tell people about us. Baggie eyes reveal lack of sleep or a smoker.

Pink or purple nails mean diabetes or poor blood circulation. Favoring one leg over the other may indicate injury or bone disease. Gout may indicate excessive alcohol consumption. Sagging skin may indicate rapid weight loss, aging, or long-term heavy drinking. Your body advertises your lifestyle and health. Looking at signs like these help you understand the person youre communicating with (faults and lifestyle decisions).