Kay Marshall Strom - Your Life With Cancer

Copyright 2012
by Kay Marshall Strom and Beacon Hill Press of Kansas City

2012 eISBN 978-0-8341-2964-1

Printed in the
United States of America

Cover Design: J.R. Caines
Inside Design: Sharon Page

All Scripture quotations not otherwise designated are from The Holy Bible, New International Version (NIV 2011). Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.TM Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Permission to quote from the following additional copyrighted versions of the Bible is acknowledged with appreciation:

The New American Standard Bible (NASB), copyright The Lockman Foundation 1960, 1962, 1963, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995.

The New King James Version (NKJV). Copyright 1979, 1980, 1982 Thomas Nelson, Inc.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the King James Version of the Bible.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Strom, Kay Marshall, 1943

Your life with cancer : a guide to spiritiual discovery, practical help, and hope / Kay Marshall Strom.

p. cm.

Revision of: The cancer survival guide. 2002.

Includes bibliographical references.

ISBN 978-0-8341-2795-1 (pbk.)

1. CancerPatientsReligious life. 2. CancerReligious aspectsChristianity. I. Title.

BV4910.33.S77 2012

248.86196994dc23

2012011676

Contents

GOOD NEWS! In the last ten years cancer diagnosis and treatment have made enormous strides. That means that today cancer patients have real reasons to hope for remissionand, yes, for a cure. These years have brought a flurry of possibilities for even the most obstinate forms of cancers. Because of all the promising research, every year that passes is sure to present us with even more breakthroughs.

One out of every four people in the United States will develop cancer. Thats what the experts tell us. No amount of money or success can prevent it, and it makes no difference how inconvenient it may be. Heyis there ever a good time to get cancer? Professional responsibilities, family concerns, financial pressuresnone of it matters one bit. No one is immune.

But here is the good news: Cancer, once considered so hopeless a diagnosis that some people refused even to utter the word out loud, is no longer the formidable enemy it was. Since the 1990s cancer rates have continued to drop. Because we know so much more about how to prevent many forms of the disease in the first place, how to diagnose it early, and how to treat it more effectively, more than a million cancer deaths have been averted in the last decade.

For me, cancer is personal. Mine is a family hit by various forms of the disease. My mother watched her own mother and grandmother die of breast cancer; then she was diagnosed with the same disease. So was my young niece. My father, now ninety-three years old, is a survivor of prostate cancer. My brother also had prostate cancer before he succumbed to esophageal cancer. Most recently, my younger sister, Lou, was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma.

My husband, Dan, and I both lost our first spouses, his wife to cancer and my husband to a rare degenerative genetic condition with the daunting name of neuroacanthocytosis.

But this book isnt about my family. It isnt even about all the exciting advances that have taken place in cancer detection and treatment. No, this book is about God and how He deals with His children in the most difficult of circumstances. It is about how He alone sees the end from the beginning and how He works every detail of our lives together for our good and His glory. Are you or someone you love dealing with cancer? You will fight a physical battle, but your coping process is more than that. First and foremost, it is spiritual.

Author and theologian C. S. Lewis in his book A Grief Observed wrote, You never know how much you really believe anything until its truth or falsehood becomes a matter of life and death to you. He had the right to speak; he watched helplessly as bone cancer consumed the body of his beloved wife, Joy.

God wants us to choose freely to believe in Him and to love Him, even when life involves suffering and pain and questions we cannot answer. He wants us to cling to Him simply because we are committed to Him more than to any other person or thing, including those that might give us positive feelings or even comfort and hope. He wants us to grab hold of Him and to hold on tightly, even when it seems we have every reason to turn away and cry, My Father, why have You forsaken me?

Good can come from even the ugliest and most devastating of circumstances. Mind you, I am not saying that the circumstance itself is goodnot the cancer or any other thing that causes us to suffer. What is good is the change that takes place inside us as we walk blindly through the darkness at His side. What is good is the change that demonstrates the unmistakable evidence of Gods presence in your life. Who but God could enable us to endure a fear and agony too deep for words and then come through it with rejoicing on our lips and hope in our hearts? God provides the grace we need in the hour we need itnever one moment sooner and never one moment too late.

In Hebrews 4:16 we read, Let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need (NASB).

Come along as we begin a journey of discovery, confidence, and hope. Come along on a journey through cancer.

SUN-SOAKED BEACHES, trade winds rustling through coconut palms, brightly colored tropical fish skimming through the coral reef. What could be better than a relaxing vacation in beautiful Hawaii? Lou and Andy had their airline tickets paid for and their bags were almost packed. Just a short list of last minute things left to do.

Unfortunately, one of Californias notorious forest fires burned out of controlnot near enough to threaten Lous home but so close that the air hung heavy with smoke. Lou coughed and coughed until in exasperation she made an appointment to see an allergist she had previously consulted. Perhaps he could give her a shot of something or maybe some pills.

I want you to get a chest X-ray, the allergist told Louonly as a precaution, he assured her. After all, she had had one just six months earlier, and it had looked greatno reason to worry.

But there was a reason worry. The new X-ray showed a shadowy something that hadnt been there before. Probably nothing, the allergist assured Lou. But well get you in to see a specialist just to make certain.

That shadowy something turned out to be a large tumor.

Can we still go to Hawaii? Lou asked the doctor. We will be gone only two weeks. As soon as we get back, I can start whatever treatment you say.

The doctor shook his head. Look at this, he said, pointing to a bulge on the side of Lous neck. This is your carotid artery.

Lou was amazed. How could it be that she hadnt noticed that?

Fly now, the doctor said, and you will be fortunate if you make it to Hawaii alive.

Everyone Reacts

Everyone reacts to life-changing news in his or her own way. Some remain distant and removed, as though the matter is not really of that much concern. Others refuse to accept the situation, insisting there has to have been a mistake. Some break down with inconsolable emotion, others determine to remain stoic, and still others are too numb to react at all. Some people lash out at God in anger, demanding an answer or at least an explanation. Others fall on their knees before Him, begging for mercy and a miracle. A few give up in resignation.