Also by Dee Brestin
The God of All Comfort 10-Lesson Bible Study Guide
(available January 2010)
The God of All Comfort Audio
The God of All Comfort Ebook
The Friendships of Women
The Falling in Love trilogy (with Kathy Troccoli)
Falling in Love with Jesus
Living in Love with Jesus
Forever in Love with Jesus
A Woman of Worship
(ten psalms with a musical CD)
A Woman of Moderation
(overcoming bad eating habits)
A Woman of Beauty
(1, 2, 3 John)
A Woman of Confidence
(1 Peter)
To Steve
ZONDERVAN
The God of All Comfort
Copyright 2009 by Dee Brestin
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ePub Edition JULY 2009 ISBN : 978-0-310-56195-8
Requests for information should be addressed to:
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Brestin, Dee, 1944
The God of all comfort : finding your way into His arms / Dee Brestin.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN 978-0-310-29361-3
1. Consolation. 2. SufferingReligious aspectsChristianity. 3. GriefReligious aspectsChristianity. 4. BereavementReligious aspectsChristianity. 5. Brestin, Dee, 1944I. Title.
BV4905.3.B74 2009
242'.4 dc22 2009009947
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C HAPTER 1
T HE C ORDS OF D EATH E NTANGLED M E
The cords of death entangled me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me.
In my distress I called to the L ORD ;
I cried to my God for help.
P SALM 18:4, 6
Friday, August 1
Fourteen months before Steves death
Oh help us, Jesus. The sky has fallen. Steve called. Its not an ulcer. He has colon cancer. Please, please, please help us. I cant even imagine life without my gentle husband. No! O sweet Jesus, help us.
Sally and Annie [two of our daughters] have just arrived at my speaking engagement in Indiana. Right away, they want to know the results of Steves test. Theres no putting them off, as I thought I might, until after I speak.
Were all crazy with fear. Were leaving now for the auditorium where I must speak. Be with us, O God.
Saturday, August 2
Were in the car nowSallys drivingtrying to get back to Steve and Beth [another daughter] in Nebraska as fast as we can. Keep us safe, O Godits dark and rainy and our tears have exhausted us.
Somehow I got through the speaking. Im sure it was dreadfulI felt like I was under water, the words coming out of my mouth like slow bubbles.
Afterward, Debbie [the Indiana retreat coordinator] told the women about Steves diagnosis. An audible gasp. A thousand women stunned. Many wept. That scared me. Hes not dyingis he, God? Nohe cant be. Hes in his prime.
And yet I know, we are but a vapor. Anyone. Anytime.
O God, help.
Debbie called the girls up so the women could pray for us. Sally broke down, bargaining with the women: PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE pray for my daddy. I need him so badly right now in my life. If you will pray fervently for my daddy, I will pray for you, whatever request you want, every day for a month. Please, please, help usthis is a terrible cancer.
I knew I needed to get the girls off the stage. I whispered to them and they turned toward the steps, moving slowly, like shattered glass. I nodded to Kim Hill, and she moved up quickly, eager to rescue us, ready to lead the women in worship.
But ohand I know You knowour hearts were so leaden it felt impossible to enter into worship. Annie was silent. Sally and I were weeping even while singing It is Well with My Soul. I had a fleeting thought of trying to be a better witness, but then had a truer thought that You hate pretense and deceit of any kind.
So, the truth is, Mighty God, I bow to Your sovereign will, for I know You are Wisdom itselfbut I am also afraid of what Your will might be. This is surely our Gethsemane.
As I tell you of our Gethsemane, I know you haveor will haveyours. I often think of how Jesus told Peter that a day was coming when Peter would be taken down a road he did not want to go.
When I learned that Steve had cancer, I felt like I was drowning, a metaphor the psalmist often uses for the feelings that overwhelm us when real trouble comes. Yet looking back, I realize that God was on His way. I am riveted by the poetic imagery in Psalm 18. Just like the psalmist, I felt the cords of death entangling me. But God heard and the earth trembled and mountains shook as He parted the heavens to come down, mounting the cherubim and flying on the wings of the wind to His child:
He reached down from on high and took hold
of me;
he drew me out of deep waters.
P SALM 18:16
As I tell you my story, I will show you how God drew me out of the deep waters, for I know He can do the same for you. The way He came to me and showed Himself to me is the way He has come and shown Himself to suffering saints throughout the ages: from Basil to Bonhoeffer to Bono, and yes, to Brestin, a simple daughter of God.