Lindsey Carlson - A Better Encouragement: Trading Self-Help for True Hope

The only proper way to conclude a book on encouragement is to acknowledge as many of the encouragers as I can who have quietly sustained, uplifted, and strengthened me to do the work set before me. When I felt like a mumbling Moses, God encouraged me to stand, find his grace, and walk by faith through the wilderness. Here are just a few tangible demonstrations of the Lords provision.

My husband Kyle emboldens me to just keep writing. By making room for me to serve the Lord inside and outside our home, Kyle regularly encourages me to pursue ministry opportunities that will allow me to dream and create but also challenge and stretch me, while filling me with joy and wonder that leads me to worship God. Im so thankful to have the chance to grow and be sanctified together as we continually learn to see with the light of truth and extend each other the grace we often need help finding for ourselves.

My kids anchor and lift me. My daughter Madeline encourages me to grow as a writer, to continually commit to the craft, honing my creativity and skills. And then theres my four sons. Collins thoughtfulness and generosity encourage me in weariness; hes always ready with a listening ear, a hug, and an afternoon cup of coffee. Judes sheer enjoyment of life regularly encourages me to smile, joke, laugh, play, and eat good food. Spencers quiet reservation reminds me that there is often good fruit in stillness and quietness; those who think deeply and speak slowly often listen more closely, ask better questions, and gain a heart of wisdom. Rex is the gift of laughter that I didnt know I needed, teaching me to parent with greater peace and gentleness and to enjoy the messiness of the process. Kids, you are all my favorite.

All of my local church ladies spur me on to good works by encouraging me with their words, prayers, and questions. I could not and would not be able to do any of this work in the church at large if I werent seen and known by each of them. In all my tears and weakness, they have walked me through the woods (some of them more literally than others), asked insightful questions, attentively listened, and inspired me to trust Gods grace would be present in each step. I am immeasurably thankful to all my Ks (Kari, Karen, Kelsey, and Renee K) and to Jen, Sharon, Nancy, Dorothy, and the two Elizabeths for their loyalty and sacrificial service, for watching kids and dogs, and for providing meals, ceaseless prayers, and words of wisdom and grace.

In the absence of any living grandparents of my own, the Lord kindly provided me with an adopted grandmother in Nancy Bach who generously opened her home to me as a quiet writing sanctuary. By insisting I turn on the fan to avoid heatstroke, wear her coat to avoid the chill, and put on shoes to avoid injuring my bare feet on the acorn-covered deck, and by ensuring I remained hydrated and well-fed, she nourished and sustained me. Nancy encourages me to see the fullness of my life as the evidence of Gods abundant blessing and to continue working from a heart of gratitude.

In a season of pain and suffering, God provided healers whose words have administered deep grace to my soul. He provided Maria Garriott who selflessly reached out and invited me into her home where shes cultivated a safe place for ministry wives to talk, breathe, laugh, and cry together. I am grateful to have a wise and talented local writer friend who generously mentors me in all things ministry, mothering, and marriage. Through Maria, God provided Becky LoPicollo (BeLoPeLo) who is the seven to my three, who goes before me and then tells me how to do things, who laughs with me when thats all thats left to do, and who celebrates me when Im too awkward to know how to celebrate lifes victories. And I owe a debt of gratitude to Kim Stter for skillfully holding up a mirror to my soul without scaring me away and teaching me how to see and comprehend the depth and the mercy of Christ. What grace and truth these women carry to others.

In the days when living far from home weighed heavily, God encouraged our family through our parents love, support, and generosity. Their willingness to pray for us, fly to us, and host our large and energetic family ensured we remained physically and emotionally well during the difficulty of pandemic living. At forty years old, we still need your encouragement. I certainly wouldnt have finished this book (or broken my collarbone or caught COVID) without your support during the infamous summer 2021 trip to Texas. To my little brother David, his wife Megan, and his girls, thank you for investing time and energy into strengthening our family, especially since we moved across the country. And thank you to the friends whove become family. Alissa, Julia, Gretchen, and Renee M, you each faithfully stand as evergreen encouragers when Im lost in the forest.

Thank you to the writers who remind me that writing isnt a vain hobby but a useful skill for building into the kingdom. You encourage me to labor with intentionality, consistency, and hope, knowing that in due time our work will produce a harvest of righteousness. Thank you Megan Hill for your friendship, for indulging my distracted texting antics, and for skillfully wielding both the red pen and the words of life. You regularly strengthen the weak-hearted. Thank you Melissa Kruger, Courtney Doctor, and Jen Wilkin for the ways youve publicly and privately encouraged me over the years and for continually paving the way for women to teach Gods word. Thank you to the entire team at Crossway for your enthusiasm and excellence.

When church planting felt impossible, God provided ministry supporters who encouraged us with their letters, calls, prayers, financial support, and gracious acts of service. God regularly utilizes your generosity to show me, my husband, and our children that we are not in this world or this ministry alone.

To all those whove taught me, been patient with me, and faithfully encouraged me, thank you. God has used your words and actions to strengthen me for marriage, motherhood, ministry, and more. Each of you are good gifts that bind me closer to Jesus and beckon me to bless and encourage others more and more with each new day.

A Better Encouragement

Contents

Our world is a mixed bag when it comes to encouragement. Often, words meant to inspire overwhelm us with burdensome demands: be better, work harder, do more . We need a better encouragement. Thankfully, Lindsey Carlsons book offers the remedy we need by speaking life-giving truths from Gods word to Gods people.

Melissa B. Kruger, Director of Womens Content, The Gospel Coalition; author, Growing Together

We live in a paradoxical time: it seems women are more discouraged than ever, but at the same time, peppy self-help talk abounds, printed on every throw pillow and journal cover in the home decor section. Our steady diet of youve got this does not actually fill us up. In A Better Encouragement , Lindsey Carlson shows us how we were made to find hope, comfort, and strength in the much deeper and richer promises of God. This book offers a timeless truth especially poignant for this cultural moment: the deepest need of discouraged women is not self-confidence but the confident assurance of our identity in Christ. I commend this book to any weary woman and all her friends.

Jen Oshman, author, Enough about Me and Cultural Counterfeits

Im so discouraged is a sentence that comes out of my mouth more often than I would like. And, as a pastors wife, its one I also hear frequentlyChristian women everywhere, weighed down by the trials of life, are struggling to take heart. Thankfully, in this book, Lindsey Carlson establishes weak hearts by pointing us to the source of true courage: God himself. With clarity, biblical depth, and a refreshing sprinkle of wry humor, A Better Encouragement reveals our God to be the hope, comfort, and strength we desperately need. Whether you are enduring a day or a decade of faint-hearted weariness, Id encourage you to find help in these pages.