Todd A. Thies Ph.D. - Legally Stoned: 14 Mind-Altering Substances You Can Obtain and Use Without Breaking the Law

Citadel Press

Kensington Publishing Corp.

www.kensingtonbooks.com

You are not merely holding a book; you are holding a key to the doors of perception. Were you to experiment with some of the fourteen mind-altering substances in Legally Stoned, you might not break the law but youd probably get high enough to go duck hunting with a rake. Ive tried four of Dr. Thiess concoctions myself and I got so high I needed a stepladder to scratch my ass. (Havent tried toad venom yet. Im saving that one for Purim or the next time Im on Bill OReilly, whichever comes first.)

Heracleitus once said that a man never steps in the same river twice. That is because the river changes and the man changes. Dr. Thies makes it clear that for thousands of years man has been changing, chemically, spiritually, politically. Thoreaus quiet desperation, though, appears to be built into the human race.

Another way of belaboring this theme is to quote my personal guru, the Hillbilly Dalai Lama, Willie Nelson, who, while smoking a joint the size of a large kosher salami, once told me, If you aint crazy, theres something wrong with you.

Seen in the pale light of the twenty-first century, according to Dr. Thies, the war on drugs currently being waged by our government at the DEA is not only futile and counterproductive, but it runs inexplicably, inexorably against the grain of the Declaration of Independence. We tried prohibition once, Dr. Thies points out, and it created many more problems than it resolved.

Dr. Thies recommends, of course, that before you partake of The CIAs Magic Beans (Andadenanthera peregrina /colubrina seeds) or the Gift from the Green Fairy (Artemisia absinthium) or anything else in this bookyou should consult your lawyer and your doctor. I understand why the good professor might have included this disclaimer, but I think its a waste of time to see a lawyer. As I always say, Where theres a will, theres a lawyer. As far as doctors go, I vividly recall the last time I went to one.

Ive got some bad news for you, he told me. Youre going to have to quit masturbating.

Why? I shouted.

Because I have to examine you, he said.

All this notwithstanding, Legally Stoned is far more than an excellent, meticulously researched sourcebook; it is a highly readable treasure trove of experiments and experiencesempirical, existential, eternal as the human spiritguaranteed to goose you, at least for the moment, out of that monotonous mortal groove. For what is life if not moments, all strung together like a necklace made of morning glory and Hawaiian baby woodrose seeds?

So should you consult your doctor or lawyer before attempting to replicate some of these experiments outside the lab? I believe there are other voices you should listen to. One of them is the still, small voice within. If you look around at a world full of slums and suburbs and Starbucks, perhaps youll hear that voice in three-part harmony with Alice in Wonderland and Jim Morrison. Then, of course, theres always the voice of Bob Dylan, who once suggested everybody must get stoned.

Dr. Thies, I believe, is an exemplary Virgil; he has performed the high spiritual task of the Wal-Mart greeter, asking each one of us, How can I help you? If you read this new, and certain to be controversial, book, I guarantee youll find it fascinating. If you decide to put the ancient key in the door, God knows what might happen.

As my personal guru Uncle Willie often says, Fortunately, were not in control.

As I often say, Why the hell not?

Medina, Texas
August 11, 2008

I have been gathering the information and experiences related in this book for more than twenty years. Without the previous work of certain individuals who are pioneers in the fields of psychoactive substances and entheogens, this book would have been very difficult, if not impossible, to write. First among these individuals are Fire and Earth Erowid, who run an Internet site containing a wealth of information on psychoactive substances. Their website was founded in 1995 with the initial focus being on entheogens. Over the years it has expanded to provide information on all mind-altering substances, becoming the online encyclopedia of psychoactive substances. The website is located at www.erowid.org.

The work of Jonathon Ott has also been of significant help in writing this book, especially his book Pharmacotheon: Entheogenic Drugs, Their Plant Sources, and History. Two other pioneers that deserve mention are Alexander and Ann Shulgin, and their books Pihkal: A Chemical Love Story, and Tihkal: The Continuation.

I must thank my wife, who has been both my support and proofreader. I want to also thank my family, especially my parents and my sister and her family. Lastly, I want to thank all those that have contributed experiences with the various substances described in the book. Many of my friends have been willing, and sometimes regretful, experimenters with me. I have chosen to leave the identities of these experimenters anonymous in order to protect them from unwanted scrutiny.

The Drug War may have begun in the twentieth century, but drug use seems to have been a part of human activity for thousands of years. While conducting research for this book, I was struck repeatedly by the observation that the use of mind-altering substances occurred in most (possibly all) cultures in the world. Most of the worlds cultures also had a long history of psychoactive substance use, which often was an important part of the cultures activities.