Advance Praise for Born to Be Wild
Yes, its incisive, engaging and beautifully written. Yes, its well grounded in the science and provides practical, clear and thoughtful advice. But what I found most outstanding, at an emotional level, is that this book brought me back to myself as a teenager, reliving a state of mind I had almost forgottenand it gave me a clearer notion of what was actually going on inside my brain.
Harold Alan Pincus, MD, professor and vice chair of the department of psychiatry, Columbia University
Why is age twenty-six the new eighteen? Why do adults make the best decisions using the least information? This fascinating and illuminating book will help you understand and influence your teenager, and yourself.
Wendy Mogel, PhD, bestselling author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee
In this extremely accessible volume, Dr. Shatkin makes sense of humorous, irrational, curious or dangerous adolescent behaviors. Based on a more accurate understanding of how teenagers think and feel, parents and other adults who interact with teens are provided with more effective approaches to deal with adolescent risk taking.
Gregory K. Fritz, MD, president, American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry
Refreshingly honest, empathic, and written with a clarity that can help parents, educators, and health professionals accept and understand why risk taking is often part of teen behavior.
Robie H. Harris, author of Its Perfectly Normal: Changing Bodies, Growing Up, Sex and Sexual Health
This book by one of Americas leading child psychiatrists is a must-read for anyone working with or raising adolescents. It demystifies this too-often baffling period of life and, most important, shares what we can all do as parents, teachers, and society at large to help turn our adolescents away from unsafe risks and toward a safe and healthy future.
Dave Levin, cofounder, KIPP
Skillfully integrating the latest scientific findings with expert clinical acumen, Dr. Shatkin has done a masterful job of capturing the complexities and contradictions that define the teenage years. Anyone who has teens, knows teens, works with teens, or even was a teen needs to read this book!
John Piacentini, PhD, ABPP, professor of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences, UCLA
Take what you know about your teenager and risk taking and chuck it out the window. (Carefully, because youre an adult.) While giving you research-based tools to curbing the truly dangerous activities teenagers engage in, Born to Be Wild is also a joyous celebration of teenagers and their sometimes inexplicable impulsiveness. Born to Be Wild is smart, funny, and deeply comforting.
Judith Newman, author of To Siri With Love: A Mother, Her Autistic Son, and the Kindness of Machines
Born to Be Wild is for everyone who wants to develop the tools to connect better with adolescentsparents, teachers, policy makers, and, in my case, writer-performers.
Ilana Glazer, comedian and cocreator and star of Broad City
This book is brilliantly written, incredibly informative, and presented in a comfortable down-to-earth manner. It is definitely going to be my new go-to referral reading for parents, educators, and therapists who will better understand why kids do the darndest things.
Dr. Laura Schlessinger, marriage and family therapist, SiriusXM Radio host
Jess Shatkins book is a must-read.... With colorful personal stories, he weaves a brilliant, highly readable, and scientifically grounded analysis of the paradox of adolescence. Without a doubt, parents, teachers, policy makers, and anyone who wants to better understand themselves, their children, or the younger generation will benefit from reading this book.
Kathleen M. Pike PhD, professor of psychology and director of the Global Mental Health Program at Columbia University Medical Center
Crafted with medical and scientific tough-mindedness, empathy, and compassion by one of the worlds experts in adolescent emotional and behavioral development... Born to Be Wild should be required reading for anyone who has or plans to have a child.
James J. Hudziak, MD, professor of psychiatry, medicine, pediatrics and communication sciences, University of Vermont College of Medicine and Medical Center
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Copyright 2017 by Jess P. Shatkin
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Ebook ISBN: 9781101993422
L IBRARY OF C ONGRESS C ATALOGING - IN -P UBLICATION D ATA
Names: Shatkin, Jess P., author.
Title: Born to be wild: why teens and tweens take risks, and how we can help
keep them safe / Jess P. Shatkin, MD, MPH.
Description: New York, NY: TarcherPerigee, [2017] | Includes bibliographical
references and index.
Identifiers: LCCN 2017016376 | ISBN 9780143129790
Subjects: LCSH: Risk-taking (Psychology) in adolescence. | Adolescence. |
Adolescent psychology.
Classification: LCC RJ506.R57 S53 2017 | DDC 616.89/140835dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017016376
Neither the publisher nor the author is engaged in rendering professional advice or services to the individual reader. The ideas, procedures, and suggestions contained in this book are not intended as a substitute for consulting with your physician. All matters regarding your health require medical supervision. Neither the author nor the publisher shall be liable or responsible for any loss or damage allegedly arising from any information or suggestion in this book.
Cover design: Will Brown
Cover image: Enjoynz / iStock
Version_1
ALSO BY JESS P. SHATKIN, MD, MPH
Child and Adolescent Mental Health:
A Practical, All-in-One Guide
Pediatric Sleep Disorders
(co-edited with Anna Ivanenko, MD, PhD)
For Huey
CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
To be normal during the adolescent period is by itself abnormal.
ANNA FREUD
I COME FROM A SUBURBAN TO WN ten miles north of San Francisco across the Golden Gate Bridge, where tract homes abound and just about every fifth house is identical. The layout of those houses pretty much describes my friends and me when we were teens. We wanted so badly to blend in with the crowd and be accepted, yet we also longed to be different from our peers and stand apart as individuals. Years later I saw a comic somewhere that depicted a boy complaining to his mother that he only wanted to be different, just like everyone else. My teenage desire to be the same yet different from my peers is a universal sentiment among adolescents.
Like far too many kids, I was often standing directly in the path of danger throughout my childhood. I first held a joint in my hand when I was seven years old. By my eighth year, I occasionally stole cigarettes from the grocery store. I got drunk for the first time when I was eleven. Two years later I was apprehended by the police for smoking marijuana, and I tried cocaine the summer before my fourteenth birthday. Because I was most often a well-behaved kid at home, my shenanigans fell largely under the radar. By midsemester of my first year of high school, however, I was playing on the freshman football team, rehearsing two evenings each week with a rock band, and failing my English class. Ultimately, after years of watching and waiting for me to grow up on my own, my parents took matters into their own hands. Two weeks before the end of the football season, they made me quit the team, which was unbelievably humiliating. They also made me quit the band, and they made sure that I was home immediately after school every afternoon until my grades turned around. I was resistant and angry with my parents for a few months, and there were lots of arguments. But by midwinter, I was earning Bs, and by spring, I was earning As.