OTHER BOOKS BY OLIVIER MAGNY
Stuff Parisians Like
Into Wine: An Invitation to Pleasure
NEW AMERICAN LIBRARY
Published by Berkley
An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC
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Copyright 2016 by Gourmand Horizons, LLC
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Magny, Olivier, author.
Title: WTF?!: What the French/Olivier Magny.
Description: New York: Berkeley Books, an imprint of Penguin Random House, 2016.
Identifiers: LCCN 2016011036 (print) | LCCN 2016026078 (ebook) | ISBN 9780425283479 (paperback) | ISBN 9780698410237 (ebook)
Subjects: LCSH: FranceSocial life and customs21st centuryHumor. | BISAC: HUMOR/General. | HISTORY/Europe/France. | HISTORY/Social History.
Classification: LCC DC33.9 .M34 2016 (print) | LCC DC33.9 (ebook) | DDC 944dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2016011036
First Edition: October 2016
Cover design by Adam Auerbach
While the author has made every effort to provide accurate telephone numbers and Internet addresses at the time of publication, neither the publisher nor the author assumes any responsibility for errors, or for changes that occur after publication. Further, publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for author or third-party Web sites or their content.
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To the people of France.
Affectueusement!
OM
CONTENTS
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Dealing with French people on a daily basis is no piece of cake. Dealing with this Frenchman even less so. For this, my deepest gratitude goes to my formidable, patient, and beautiful wife.
Thank you to my ever-enduring parents. Thank you also to my in-laws for treating me like a son, despite my Frenchness!
Special thanks also to all the team at O Chateau and Caves du Louvre, and particularly to the captain of the ship: Nicolas Paradis.
Special thanks to my friend Cameron for his support throughout the writing of this book.
Thank you also to my agent Irene Goodman, who made this book possible. Her love of France and kind lenience with my silly texts have been a source of encouragement and joy. Thank you to Allison Janice at Berkley for editing out some of my silliest thoughts. Thank you also to Emmanuelle Heurtebize, who made this whole adventure possible.
Finally, thank you also to you, dear reader, for picking up this book. It is nice to think that there is someone on the other side of these words.
INTRODUCTION
T he story of this book started a few years ago when I started writing a blog for my wine-tasting company. The blog was called Stuff Parisians Like. Much to my surprise, the blog grew quite popular and soon enough became a beautiful little book. I would have been happy with the story ending there.
It did not.
In just a few weeks, the book became a bestseller in France. I suddenly started to receive extremely incongruous notes: one from a student telling me their professor at La Sorbonne had them study two of my texts in class, another one from a theatrical director who asked me for permission to read and act out my silly writings onstage. Snail mail also got more interesting, as I received translations of my book in Polish, Germanheck, even Taiwanese!
The day you receive your book in Taiwanese is a strange one. Especially when your day-to-day is absolutely not that of a writer. In real life, Im an entrepreneur. At age twenty-three, I started a wine-tasting company. The following decade of my life I dedicated to trying to make French wine, and somehow French culture, more intelligible to the clients of O Chateau. Many fascinating discussions, much hilarity, and countless glasses of wine ensued.
This new book is the continuation of these discussions. Im afraid youll have to pour your own vino, but I hope you find in the following pages a story youll find interesting, possibly helpful, and at times amusing. My ambition was never to write a book that would be comprehensive about any of the aspects I touch on. Even though it is sourced, fact-checked, and documented; even though it was written by someone whos 100 percent French, who grew up in France, and who has started and operated a business in France, this is not a guidebook, a manual, or a textbookit is more of a snapshot. I tried to angle the lens and shoot from a distance that I think will help you gain a better understanding of France through all of the realities, facts, trends, and quirks this book describes. Im sure youll have your share of surprises.
Now, get that glass of wine, kick back, and enjoy!
LE TERROIR
U nderstanding Franceand wine while youre at itrequires being acquainted with a word the French language had the elegance to give birth to and to nurture. That word is terroir.
Ask a wine lover what makes a great bottle of wine so great: le terroir. Why is this winemaker so excited about this small little parcel on that particular hill? Le terroir. What is so wonderful about Burgundy or Piemonte? Le terroir. Le terroir is somewhereness; it is the essence of a place, its signature. It is whats unique, nonreproducible, and singular about it.
In the world of wine, this translates into the unique combination of soil, subsoil, climate, topology, etc., all of which contribute to giving a unique taste to the grapes and therefore ultimately to the wine produced in that particular place. French wine is so complex and diverse because, to the very core of how it is organized, farmed, and sold, it values terroir. In France, names of placesnot of grapesdefine wine. People in France order Bordeaux, Beaujolais, Sancerre, and Champagne, which are all regions, not Merlot, Pinot Noir, or Sauvignon Blanc, which all refer to grape varieties! Wine, for the French, is about where its from far more than about what grape(s) its made from.
Ultimately, terroir is what makes one place different from another. The terroir of the American South at the beginning of the last century gave us jazz, just like that of the Bronx in the 1980s gave us hip-hop.
France is home to countless terroirs, which have been shaped over millennia. It is also home to a culture that recognizes, appreciates, and sometimes even reveres them. Anyone who has traveled extensively through France can grasp the tremendous variety in architecture, cuisine, wine, accents, crops, sports, and cultural references from one French region to the next. Normandy is immediately and irremediably distinguishable from Alsace, in the same way that Provence is different from Brittany, or Corsica from the Alps.