Copyright 2012 by Julie Metzger and Robert Lehman
All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced or utilized in any form, or by any electronic, mechanical, or other means, without the prior written permission of the publisher.
Published by Sasquatch Books
Cover and interior illustrations: Lia Cerizo
Cover design: Lia Cerizo and Anna Goldstein
Interior design and composition: Anna Goldstein
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.
eISBN: 978-1-57061-828-4
Sasquatch Books
1904 3rd Avenue, Suite 710
Seattle, WA 98101
(206) 467-4300
www.sasquatchbooks.com
v3.1
Contents
1. When You Are All Grown Up, Do You Wish You Were a Kid?
And Other Questions About Growing Up
2. Im 5 Foot 3 and Wear Size 9 Shoes. Does That Mean Ill Start Puberty Soon?
And Other Questions About Growing Taller, Gaining Weight, and Changing Shape
3. How Many Pimples Do You Usually Get?
And Other Questions About Zits and Acne
4. Some People Have Noticed That I Have a Bad Smell; What Should I Do About It?
And Other Questions About Body Odor and Sweat
5. Why Do You Need a Bra in the First Place?
And Other Questions About Breasts and Bras
6. Why Is Pubic Hair Curly When I Have Straight Hair?
And Other Questions About Hair in New and Interesting Places
7. What If I Have My Period for the First Time at School?
And Other Questions About Periods
8. How Moody Can You Get?
And Other Questions About Feelings and Emotions
9. Do Girls in Puberty Gossip?
And Other Questions About Friendships with Girls
10. Do Boys Have Crushes on Us or Is It Just a Rumor?
And Other Questions About Crushes, Dating, and Attractions
11. How Can I Make My Mom Seem Like More of an Option to Talk To?
And Other Questions About Your Relationship with Your Parents
12. Why Do Boys Grunt Instead of Talk?
And Other Questions Girls Have About Boys and Their Bodies
13. Why Does All This Have to Happen in a Sexual Way?
And Other Questions About Sexual Intercourse, STDs, Masturbation, and Making Decisions About Sex
14. Are Hips for Babies to Rest On?
And Other Questions About Pregnancy, Pregnancy Prevention, Childbirth, and Babies
Introduction
Welcome to the book of questions on puberty, sex, and other growing-up stuff asked by preteen girls (and boys tooflip the book to to see the other side!).
Who is asking these questions, you might ask? Every single question in this book has been written on a note card by someone just like you. For more than twenty years Julie Metzger (me) has been talking with girls and their moms, and Rob Lehman with boys and their dads, in a class by Great Conversations on important ideas about growing up. (Wow! That is a lot of classes and a lot of questions!)
In our classes we talk about what happens as our bodies change from girls to adult women (a process called puberty), everything that happens to boys bodies during puberty (wow, really?), about how we make decisions in friendships and relationships, and all about sex, sexuality, and babies. In our classes we invite the girls, mostly ten to twelve years old, to ask a question on a note card so we can answer them for the whole groupand weve saved every one of those questions! This book is a collection of some of the questions that are asked the most, some of our favorites sprinkled in, and some that really helped everyone understand what is on the minds of preteens as they are growing up.
Even though all these questions are asked by preteens, we hope you will share some of the questions and answers with your parents, teachers, or anyone else interested in what might be on your mind and the minds of other preteens. We know that parents and other trusted adults in your life are some of the most important resources you haveand they want this whole growing-up thing to go well for you! Our answers are not meant to tell the whole story or be the final wordjust the opposite. We hope youll feel comfortable talking further about some of these subjects with those adults who are close to youthats the whole idea of having Great Conversations!
Our most grateful thanks to all the girls (and boys!) who participated in our classes, and were brave enough to submit a question and curious enough to keep asking questions on subjects that were obviously important to them.
And thanks to our colleagues who reviewed the material to keep us honest, the kids who reviewed the material to keep us developmentally on-target, and our friends and families who made sure it stayed interesting.
And thanks most of all to my parents, Jerry and PR, for their lifetime of advocacy for me and for so many others; to Michael for his enduring love; and to Peter, Katie, and Emma for their daily inspiration.
JULIE GIESY METZGER, RN, MN
Julie Metzger, RN, MN, has worked for more than twenty years with families of preteens and teens on topics of puberty, sexuality, and decision making. Bringing a wealth of knowledge from her experiences, Metzger is a well-respected and popular speaker on a wide range of parenting issues, has worked in many capacities as a nurse consultant, and is the parent of three young adults. She has shared her program Heart to Heart For Girls Only with tens of thousands of families at Seattle Childrens Hospital, Lucile Packard Childrens Hospital at the Stanford Medical Center, and throughout the Puget Sound region. Julie has also written and presented health curricula on decision making and friendships for middle and high school students and advocated for adolescents and families in the community through Great Conversations. For more information on classes, programs, and other resources, visit GreatConversations.com.
What is the POINT of puberty?