How to Be
Kinkier
More
Adventures
in Adult
Playtime
Morpheous
Green Candy Press
How to Be Kinkier
ISBN 978-1-937866-12-9
Published by Green Candy Press
www.greencandypress.com
Copyright 2012 Morpheous
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without express written permission from the Publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages or reproduce illustrations in a review where appropriate credit is given. Nor may any part of this book be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means without written permission from the Publisher.
Dedication
Mary, Elle and EffiThank you for all your wonderful support over the years.
Contents
by Nina Hartley
I became aware of Morpheous a few years back when he sent me a copy of his excellent first book for beginner kinksters, How to Be Kinky. I was struck right away by its honesty, accessibility, practicality, inclusivity, good humor and confident, friendly tone, which clearly arose from his lived experience as a happy kinkster. I recognized him instantly as a fellow traveler, someone dedicated to unlocking the mysteries, power, beauty and grace of sexuality by using his erotic nature as his guide. We each became comfortable in our skin, not just to have a rocking good time in bed, but also to share that deep understanding with others in a physical way, body to body. Weve turned the adage, Those who cant do, teach, on its head. We teach because we can do, the public teaching stemming from the private doing, as naturally as breathing.
Whatever else it may be, sex is, at its heart, a physical practice and dance, akin to martial arts, a tea ceremony, yoga or ballet. Becoming an effective sex partner requires a lot of practice and focus and that goes triple for kinky sex. Morpheous has done the heavy lifting for you regarding the practical aspects of kinky play, including how to think about adding kink to your sex life, and he has laid this information out for you in both his books. This enables interested parties to more effectively negotiate satisfactory relationships, be they for a night or a lifetime.
In the first book Morpheous spent a lot of time explaining the basics, such as what is a whip? How does one use it? Why would one want to whip or be whipped? How can I safely tie up my partner? and What are good body postures to help get me/my partner in the proper mood?; in short, all of the information one would need to transition from having regular, vanilla sex to creating a scenario precisely designed to drive the participants crazy with desire, and then satisfying that desire in ways never before imagined. For that conversation, How to Be Kinky is a most excellent primer.
Facing Page: Keep your sub under control at all times!
As the late-night TV ads say, But wait, theres more! That more is the topic of this book. How does a couple that wants to invite a third party into the bedroom or playspace do so? What questions should we ask, both of ourselves as well as our potential partner? Of what must we be aware before we even attempt making real such a common fantasy? Morpheous makes it clear how best to proceed. Moving beyond the occasional, casual threesome, the author also delves deeply into the issues that arise when two people in a committed relationship decide that theyd like to explore polyamory. He offers good, practical guidelines for that conversation as well as an overview of the potential pitfalls.
What if a couple decides that it wants to expand the roles that the members inhabit during play outside the bedroom and into more of daily life (so-called 24/7 couples)? Theres a LOT to know before deciding to make your entire life a form of contemplative foreplay and erotic devotion and Morpheous brings his considerable experience to bear on this timely subject. He knows that in situations like this there is no one-size-fits-all answer, only the solutions relevant to the couple in question. Kinky sex, like all sexual relations, is expressly built to suit.
What about advanced toys such as electrical gizmos and the like? Morpheous helps the reader past their concerns and tells us how to use them both effectively as well as safely. He does the same with advanced bondage techniques, moving beyond the simple, four-point restraint on a comfy bed to more complicated setups using other furniture. No matter how far out the scenarios may be, Morpheous never loses sight of the first imperative of kinky sex: safety first. Since he wants us all to live to play another day he devotes an entire chapter on safety issues, from the Duh, of course! moment to points a more novice player would never imagine.
As with any other affinity group, kinky people are part of a community, with community standards, meetings, get-togethers (in kinky speak, munches), conventions (local, state, regional and national), pagents, websites, workshops, books and the like, the better for like-minded people to be able to find each other, be it for business, pleasure or mating purposes. Morpheous tells it like it is about how to become a member in good standing of ones local kink organization, and how best to participate in it, be it as a host of a munch or play party, or the leader of it. Except for the behavior of the members, its not a lot different from the Rotary club, believe it or notand what they do behind closed doors might be more similar than we imagine!
For those who want to professionalize their kink, either in front of the camera or behind it, the author does an excellent job of laying out, exactly, what it means to be a professional model or a kink photographer. Whats expected of each person in that role? How can one advance from being strictly amateur to actually getting paid for what has been, so far, just done for fun? How does one keep oneself safe, or create a workplace that is safe? If you think you may want to go down that path, this book is worth the price of admission just for that chapter alone.
Very few people take their first foray into kink and dont find themselves wanting more; this book, then, is the entre to How To Be Kinkys appetizer. It will satiate your hunger for a more fulfilling and thrilling kink encounter, and it will pave your way into a full-time kinky lifestyle, if thats what youre looking for. Either way, Im sure that by the time youve finished, youll be hungry for dessert!
Nina Hartley Los Angeles September, 2011 |