Denise McAllister - What Men Want to Say to Women (But Cant)

Advance Praise for
What Men Want to Say to Women (But Cant)

Part memoir, part cultural analysis, What Men Want to Say to Women (But Cant) offers a searing indictment of the lies told by feminism about what men and women wantand dont want. Drawing on her own experience of abuse, divorce, childrearing, and marriage, McAllister is a veritable second Shakespearean Kate, calling her sisters to cast off their shrewishness out of love for the fathers,
husbands, brothers, and sons who love, serve, and protect them.

Rachel Fulton Brown , Author of Mary and the Art of Prayer: The Hours of the Virgin in Medieval Christian Life
and Thought , and Milo Chronicles: Devotions, 2016-2019

Too much of conservative media has become similar to the Left media in terms of culture. Too much assimilation. Too much pack mentality. Too little critical thinking. Too few contrarians. Denise is part of a remnant still willing to say difficult things and ask uncomfortable questions. At the very least, hear her out to check your own thinking. Whether you agree or disagree, youll be smarter for it.

Steve Deace , Author of Truth Bombs: Confronting the Lies Conservatives Believe (To Our Own Demise) and Host of Steve Deace Show , BlazeTV

What Men Want to Say to Women (But Cant) serves as a wake-up call for women to finally understand men. It blows the lid off the lies Americans have been sold about men and masculinity and helps modern women feel the kind of compassion and respect for men that most Americans used to share. Denise McAllister is a bold writer, which is precisely what this subject needs.

Suzanne Venker , Author of The Alpha Females Guide to Men and Marriage

A triumph of compassion, insight, and good sense. Denise McAllister doesnt just want to fix how men and women talk to each other. She wants to heal a fraying holy sacrament. Read this book to save your marriageor to find one.

Milo Yiannopoulos

Denise McAllister has no fear of controversy. Her ideas about men and women bristle some, but also speak for many who feel cowed in todays constricted public square. With fierce devotion to tradition, she tackles a world of gender that is changing at a breakneck pace and urges our society to pump the brakes.

David Marcus , New York Correspondent
for The Federalist

Sometimes a book comes along to articulate the inchoate insanity that leftist ideology has wreaked on human affairs. Denise McAllisters What Men Want to Say to Women (But Cant) is that book as the author outlines how woke feminism and identity politics have distorted what women expect and what men can and cannot deliver in relationships. McAllister patiently unravels how women have been programmed to misunderstand the realities of relations between the sexes, and shes extremely clear-headed about how this strain of society-destroying cultural Marxism has been promulgated. This book will help bring everyone back to basic realities in
how men think, so women can deal with them realistically.

Lisa Schiffren , NYC-based writer on politics and culture and Senior Fellow at Independent Womens Forum

A BOMBARDIER BOOKS BOOK

An Imprint of Post Hill Press

ISBN: 978-1-64293-312-3

ISBN (eBook): 978-1-64293-313-0

What Men Want to Say to Women (But Cant)

2020 by Denise McAllister

All Rights Reserved

Cover Photo by Michael McAllister

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author and publisher.

Post Hill Press

New York Nashville

posthillpress.com

Published in the United States of America

To Michael and Dad

Contents

A ll books are a labor of love. This one was also a labor of perseverance. I couldnt have done it without the help of many people, beginning with my wonderful husband who has been a rock by my side through good times and bad. I still cant believe he loves me, but he seems to hang in there on this crazy ride weve taken together. He and our children have been the loves of my life, and I thank each of them for their constant support while writing this book.

I want to thank my mom, whose confidence in me never fails, whose prayers for me never cease, and whose love has sustained me through the darkest times of my life. She is a woman of strengtha true feminist of the first variety who has helped me become the woman I am today. Likewise, my dad has been an inspiration in writing this book, and stories about him grace the pages. He believes in me, and that faith has helped me to believe in myself. In the same way, my brother, Steve, has been a constant source of encouragementa cheerleader, just as he has always been, from soccer games when I was young to the political theater I find myself in today.

I also want to acknowledge two amazing ladies who have encouraged me during this project by listening to me untangle the thoughts in my head and reading the manuscript. My best friend, Katelyn, has been a fellow soldier in the battle for masculinity, and she has supported me with her insight and intuitionmy Scottish fairy who sprinkles me with magic every day. And my dear friend Jenni has been prayer warrior on my behalf as Ive emailed her chapter after chapter, peppering her with questions and fishing for reassurances. Her faithfulness is humbling.

Id also like to thank my publisher, David Bernstein, who bravely took on this controversial project and has stood beside me when others jumped ship. His brilliance has been a North Star, and I appreciate him for the strong man he is. Another man of strength who has inspired me to write this book is David Limbaugh. He has been a gentle voice of reason and faith along this journey, helping me to stay the course in the midst of turmoilas has Lynda McLaughlin, a woman of unrelenting strength, honesty, and a take-no-prisoners attitude. She has motivated me to keep moving forward, reminding me to just breathe.

Finally, I have to thank Jesus Christ, my savior and my God. Without him, I can do nothing. Only by his strength have I been able to ride the storm of life and not only survive, but thrive, in hope of helping othershowever imperfectly. I pray this book will honor him and serve as a guidepost in human relations, reminding us of who we are and who we can become.

I f youre going to compete with men in the workplace, dont ask for special favors or entitlements when you failand, for Gods sake, stop being so bitchy.

No, youre not as physically strong as a manand, if you think you are, take the hits of competition like a man.

Stop telling me how to parent our children. Im not you. Im not a woman. Children need a man in their livestheir father.

When I look at your boobs, I dont want to rape you. I just think youre beautifuland sexy. Thats not a threat. Thats nature, and its good.

These are just some things men want to say to women but cantnot without backlash or accusations of sexism. In this book, I unpack these sentimentswhy men think them, why women should take them seriously, and how we can bridge fissures formed in relationships due to contemporary feminism. No matter ones political persuasion, most of us agree theres something deeply wrong in America today. Conflict has reached a fever pitch as our nation has become alarmingly polarized in the political arena. Many look to politicians and public policies for solutions, but journalist Andrew Breitbart rightly said that politics couldnt be fixed if culture is ignored, because politics is downstream from culture. I would take this observation a step furtherpolitics might be downstream from culture, but culture is downstream from relationships. If we dont focus on the personal building blocks of society, we will fail to fix problems in culture and the politics that flow from it. If relationships are sick or brokenespecially those between men and womenthen everything else is affected. If theres little love, respect, and trust there, you wont find it anywhere else.