Elizabeth N. Doyd - Write Him Off: Journal Prompts to Heal Your Broken Heart in 30 Days

Write Him Off

Heal Your Broken Heart in 30 Days

by Elizabeth N. Doyd

Copyright

Elizabeth N. Doyd 2014

All Rights Reserved

No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or any other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

In practical advice books, like anything else in life, there are no guarantees of results. This book is not intended for use as a source of medical advice. All readers are advised to seek services of competent professionals in the medical field as needed.

Introduction

Every woman on earth has been heart broken at some point in life. Doctors and models, athletes and mothersno one is exempt from this gut-wrenching experience. The cord snapped from a deep connection with a significant other can send you reeling into the dark unknown. No wonder youre scrambling to get things back to the way they were. But life is about moving forward, not dwelling on the past. As vulnerable and helpless as you feel right now, there is something you can control.

Do you want to be the woman who lets one breakup, one measly man, shatter her world and keep her in perpetual pain and turmoil?

Or do you want to be the woman who walks out of this incompatible relationship with her head held high and straight onto the path of love and faith? This woman is confident that she will be with the right man at the right time, and that this speed bump only has something to teach her along the way.

It may not seem like it now, but there is plenty to learn.

Writing is a great way of getting your pain on paper. Let yourself cry and indulge until you cant bear the sight of another piece of chocolate. Remember that emotion can be a funny thing. It has a cunning way of convincing you that it is real. It sustains itself through your belief that it is. When emotions are down on the page, its concrete. You can examine it with more rationality, and this gives you a better chance of releasing its hold over you.

Journaling can also help you uncover some inner blockages you may be unconscious of. By making the effort to write every day, youre taking the necessary steps to releasing your ex, but also your self-doubts and insecurities. As you write, youll find that inner part of your soul emerging to give you the answers you didnt think you had.

Acknowledge that this will not be an easy time; expect the healing process to be uncomfortable. You opened your heart to someone, but you are not broken. Your heart may feel like it, but its still pumping. Youre still alive. If you didnt feel pain, you wouldnt be. Youre braver than you think.

Give yourself the time to heal and take care of yourself the best you can. Sometimes it may seem impossible that youll ever get over him. You will. But it wont serve you to contact him. This journal will let you express yourself without the risk of judgment and without breaking your dignity.

You can do one journal prompt each day every day for 30 days, or you can pace them and take breaks in between if you find the work to be emotionally heavy. Either way, give yourself credit for making the effort to let go. Your journal is a safe place for your emotions.

A relationship consists of two people. The other is always a reflection of us. Thats why this book is divided into two sections: 15 prompts that turn the spotlight on him, and 15 that focuses on you. By taking the responsibility in the role you played in the relationship, you can let go of the toxic hold it has over you. Youll release some of the negative beliefs you may have about love, and about yourself, and then set a plan to build your self-esteem and faith in finding a more suitable partner.

Its hard to see a bright future when youre in mourning, feeling as if youve been sucked into a black hole. The relationship had once been a source of security and now the security is gone. But time really does heal. Track your progress in writing.

If you dont have a journal, buy one with a cover that appeals to you. Make sure its comfortable to write in. Some people prefer spiral-ring notebooks so they can fold over the pages. Use whatever that works for you.

Have you ever kept a journal in your childhood or early teen years? When you read back the entries, dont they amuse you with their melodramatic urgency? In 30 days, its entirely possible that youll read back on your first few entries and shake your head with the wisdom of a woman whod lived to tell the tale and more.

When youve finished with the prompts, keep tracking your progress. Note the people, places, things and experiences youre grateful to have in your life. Write him off and write yourself into a life of love and joy.

Elizabeth N. Doyd

Day 1: Write It Raw

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Are you holding imagery conversations with your ex in your head? Ones where you get to say what you didnt get to say when your relationship ended?

Obsessing over what should have been is unhealthy and sucks the positive energy out of you. Its exhausting to be fighting with him, even mentally, but the urge to communicate with him is so strong that you want to pick up the phone (again) and speak your mind.

Do not contact him. He hurt you. Dont give him the chance to hurt you again.

Write down your feelings in your journal instead. What do you blame him for? What do you want to say to him? Are you angry with him? Do you miss him?

Use as many pages as you want. Pretend youre writing a letter directly to him. But do not send it. Do not contact him and read it out loud to him. Doing so will put yourself in great risk of being trapped in the same cycle of negativity.

This should be a safe experience to explore your pain in order to put it behind you, not to stir up more arguments with someone who caused the pain in the first place. If youre energized by this outpouring of emotion and feel a strong urge to share it, call a trusted friend instead.

Day 2: Unfinished Business

Sometimes the only way the good Lord can get into some hearts is to break them.

Fulton J. Sheen

If you still have the urge to see him again in the name of closure, be honest with yourself. Is this just another excuse to see him? To make him realize that he was wrong? For him to see what hes missing and take you back?

Seeing him will postpone your recovery. Begging and groveling will not regain his interest. Dont bother dressing sexy and trying to bump into him either. Theres a reason that hes not reaching out to you. Retain your dignity. A high value woman doesnt beg a man to love her.

Give him space and if he really loves you, he will come back to you on his own. Men often withdraw, unable to deal with their emotions. Let him be. Respect his distance.

This may be hard if you are constantly reminded of his existence on social media. If you have friends in common, dont feel guilty about pulling back from the group while you heal. If he lives in the same neighborhood, take a break from your regular hang-out spots for a while.

Make a list of everything you can do to remove his presence from your life. Some more examples: delete his contacts from your phone, delete his emails, block/delete him on Facebook and other social media sites.

If you work together, avoid his area of the office. Find a new bistro to eat lunch at for a while. If you have children together and cant avoid speaking to him, try to keep your discussion to practical topics, such as school pickup schedules. Define clear boundaries.