Dawn Dais - The Nonrunners Marathon Guide for Women: Get Off Your Butt and On with Your Training

The Nonrunners Marathon Guide for Women:

Get Off Your Butt and On with Your Training

Copyright 2006, 2013 by Dawn Dais

Milkshake by Kelis 2004 by Mukhlis Music. All rights reserved.

Published by Seal Press

A member of the Perseus Books Group

1700 4th Street

Berkeley, CA 94710

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form without written permission from the publisher, except by reviewers who may quote brief excerpts in connection with a review.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Dais, Dawn.

The nonrunners marathon guide for women : get off your butt and on with your training / Dawn Dais.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references and index.

ISBN-13: 978-1-58005-280-1

1. Running for women. 2. Marathon runningTraining. I. Title.

GV1061.18.W66N66 2006

796.42082dc22

2006023886

20 19 18 17 16 15 14 13

Cover design by Seal Press

Interior design by Megan Cooney

Distributed by Publishers Group West

For my grandfather,

who never could have finished a marathon,

and who never would have doubted for one second that I could.

CONTENTS

S everal years ago I wrote a book about training for a marathonin fact, you hold it in your very hands at this moment. Seeing as how Im a self-proclaimed couch potato, the fact that I wrote a marathon-training book is funny enough in and of itself. But then, people actually bought the book, and they actually liked it. Now that is plain hilarious. How did this happen?

I frequently get emails from people who have read this book and have been inspired to train for a marathon as a result. The irony of that statement nearly makes my brain explode every time I read it. Of all the things I could have inspired people to do in my lifetime, I feel like running is by far the most random and completely unexpected (inspiring a DVD-watching marathon would fall under the most expected heading for me). Never as I was hobbling along during my marathon training did I think to myself, The tale of my mediocre athleticism will someday inspire the masses! But before all that, lets first take a little break on that park bench over there. The masses will understand.

The people who have reached out over the years have been the single best part of this books unexpected success. Ive loved hearing the different reasons why people have decided to start running, their unique struggles throughout training, and the universal elation upon their completion. Its such a crazy thing to think that Ive been part of so many finish lines, and, more important, so many training miles that led to those finish lines. In all seriousness, it has been an honor because I know how important those finish lines can be.

In my case I can honestly say that training for a marathon changed my lifeand not just because it led to me appearing in spandex on morning television while promoting this book (although that was pretty scarring for all involved). Training for and completing my marathon taught me how to tackle a challenge in a very organized way, and that skill has served me well over the years. Truly, 26.2 seems like a completely ridiculous and insurmountable number of miles to run. And it is, if you were to head out and try to run it today, with no training. But instead you back out from that number and start all the way down at 1 mile. Then you move to 3 miles, then 5, then 7, and so on and so forth. And then all of a sudden (and by all of a sudden I mean after weeks and months of grueling training) you get to a point where 26.2 doesnt actually seem totally impossible.

Once youve successfully tackled a goal as huge as 26.2 miles, you are uniquely prepared to take on just about any difficult challenge or lofty dream that may come your way because you know any destination is possible if you are willing to take the little steps to get there. For all of you who have invited me along on your steps and have enjoyed my sarcastic take on a very serious sport, thank you for your humor and your heart. Both are an absolute requirement for anything as crazy as 26.2.

When I wrote this book, my intention was always to provide new runners with a funny guide through marathon training and to offer them a voice that isnt normally found in books with the words marathon and training on the cover (although the worn-in recliner on the cover could probably give you a little hint as to what kind of voice is waiting inside). Judging by the books success over the years, it appears Im not the only one who falls under the heading of Reluctant Athlete. Who knew there were so many of us out there cussing under our labored breaths as we navigate those running trails?

For those of you just starting out, I hope this book can provide you with some laughs between the long runs, reference books, and forced Power Bar consumption you are about to take on. Sure, we are tackling insurmountable goals with the sheer force of our minds, bodies, and determinationbut that doesnt mean there isnt room for some cussing along the way.

Heres to the next adventure...

I bravely spent many months embedded in the marathon-training world. Much like the reporters who travel with soldiers during wartime, I barely made it out to tell my tale. What follows are my stories from the frontlines (or the backlines, as it were), as well as a training guide for those who want to follow in my recliner-to-race-day footsteps. How does one go from being a couch potato to finishing a marathon? One consumes a lot of ibuprofen.

Just like you may be starting your training, I began mine with my butt firmly attached to my recliner. After a little inspirationand a lot of delusionI hopped off that recliner and decided to run a marathon. Then reality set in (as it has a pesky way of doing), and I began to realize I was going to need a lot more than a little inspiration to get me through my months of training. Luckily, reality made an appearance about the same time my running buddy, Chipper Jen, did. I called her Chipper Jen because she was chipper as hell and had an enthusiasm for running that bordered on psychotic. Yet, her insane love of running and my insane running attempts somehow came together and helped us both through months of training and the marathon itself.

Id like you to think of The Nonrunners Marathon Guide for Women as your running buddy. Its here to keep you motivated and on the running trail when all you really want to do is lie on the couch and see what your TiVo has recorded for you. Rest assured that this book is much better than my running buddy; unlike Chipper Jen, this book will never call you at 6:30 AM on a friggin Saturday and go on and on about how refreshing it is to run in the morning. This book is not a supporter of Saturday-morning chipperness.