Table of Contents
DEDICATION
To all the couples in the world who are struggling to discover true intimacy and sexual passion.
To everyone who seeks love in body, mind, and spirit. Forever.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
To the people who make my life better each and every day: my parents, the Rav and Karen; my brother Michael; my wife Michal and our children; and my dear friend Billy.
BOOK ONE
IN SEARCH OF SEVENTH HEAVEN
WHATS IT ALL ABOUT?
Its all about sex. Everything. It always has been. From the creation of the universe to the mysteries of God, from the meaning of life to an actual formula for attaining never-ending fulfillment, understanding sex can help us understand it all.
In other words, when you know what sex is all about, you will know what life is all about. In turn, when you know what sex and life are all about, you will know how to ignite pleasure and infuse passion into your relationships, and were talking about passion and pleasure that lasts a lifetimewith the same partner, no less!
Chances are you probably never knew sex was loaded with such majestic meaning and cosmic significance. According to the teachings of Kabbalah, it most definitely is.
The ancient wisdom of Kabbalah is about as straightforward as anything can possibly be on the subject of sex. And for good reason. Wise kabbalists throughout history tell us that a sexual act, far more intense and profound than you can possibly imagine, brought about the Big Bang creation of our universe about 15 billion years ago.
By the way, Kabbalah happens to be the oldest wisdom in the world. Abraham used it to grasp the interconnectedness of our universe (the oneness of God) some 4,000 years ago. Moses utilized Kabbalah to part the Red Sea and to achieve a temporary state of heaven on Earth during his ascension on Mount Sinai 3,400 years ago. Jesus was a kabbalist who tried to bring these powerful teachings to the masses more than 2,000 years ago. Plato borrowed from Kabbalah. Later, Sir Isaac Newton, Henry More (Newtons teacher), and other great thinkers of the Renaissance drew from the ancient books of Kabbalah to begin the scientific revolution in the 17th and 18th centuries. In fact, one of Newtons greatest discoveries concerning the structure of white light is found in his personal copy of The Zohar, the most important book of Kabbalah. Newtons Zohar, which is still archived at Trinity College in Cambridge, was clearly an important source of inspiration.
Quite impressive.
In addition to possessing all the secrets of science and revealing all the mysteries of the natural world, Kabbalah also contains the secrets to great sex.
NO GUILT, NO SHAME
For far too long, religion has equated sex with shame, guilt, and embarrassment. Sex, from the standpoint of religion, has often been seen as a necessary evil that mankind was forced to endure in order to bear sons and daughters. Reay Tannahill, a scholar who wrote a book entitled
Sex in History, says early Christian leaders equated sex with sin. She writes,
It was Augustine who epitomized a general feeling among the church fathers that the act of intercourse was fundamentally disgusting.
The great Hebrew sage Maimonides taught that sexual intercourse was for procreation purposes only. Maimonides considered bodily pleasure a dreadful, vile thing.
Kabbalists held a different view. To the kabbalist, pleasing ones body was just as holy an action as pleasing ones soul. After all, it was the Creator who created both body and soul. Perhaps this is one reason why the religious establishment loathed and feared the kabbalists.
THE SACRED AND THE SEXUAL
Kabbalah promises us a fulfilling and wild sex life, which might be more than you dare to imagine. Because lets be honest: In most relationships, great sex lasts a year at most. Sex becomes routine. Sex becomes boring. For some, sex becomes no different than a household chore.
But sex was never meant to be that way. According to Kabbalah, God intended sex to be a never-ending, passionate experience, overflowing with profound pleasure and breathless excitement.
At this moment, you might be asking yourself,
God wants us to have hot, passionate sexual relationships?
You bet. Sex, according to Kabbalah, is the most powerful way to experience the Light of the Creator. It is also one of the most powerful ways to transform the world. Thats rightsex can transform the world. The ancient kabbalists tell us that when the Earth moves beneath you during passionate lovemaking, spiritual worlds also tremble and move above you. So sex has a power that extends far beyond the door of the bedroom. Kabbalah reveals how our most intensely erotic moments reverberate throughout the Cosmos, just as a small stone tossed into still, deep water causes ripples that radiate outward.
Well explore these ideas in greater detail later. For now, the critical question is this: If God intended for us to enjoy great sex, and if you just happen to agree with God, why doesnt great sex happen all the time in our relationships? Why has the sexual act been so deeply linked to guilt, shame, and abuse?
Enter The Kabbalah Book of Sex. The answer to this age-old question and the solution to the problem of passionless sex are what this book is all about.
TWO TALES OF DISCONNECTION
Meet Michael. Michael has just been to Seventh Heaven for the first time in his life. Seventh Heaven, as well soon find out, is a real place. It is a realm of pure, raw, naked energy. When you get there, when you touch Seventh Heaven, sex is wildly, madly magnificent.
It took Michael 41 years to get there. Michael reached Seventh Heaven courtesy of Kabbalah. Prior to his first trip, his pursuit of sexual pleasure was confined to chat rooms in cyberspace, his secretarys office, and the privacy of his bathroom. And, of course, it also included the occasional connection to his wife of 11 years, Meredith.
Michael tells it like it was:
I was exactly like the character Kevin Spacey played in the movie American Beauty. After a few years of marriage, the electricity was gone. Sex became routine. For my wife, it was an obligation, like a mortgage payment due at the end of the month. I was having better sex with myself than I was having with her. I needed some excitement. So I flirted with my secretary, my wifes friends, and female clientsa lot of touching, kissing, and explicit sexual conversations. It was never my intention to cheat when I got married. But after a few years, I wasnt being sexually fulfilled at home.
I was a selfish jerk, so I flirted whenever I could. My best friend at the time went all out. He cheated on his wife and slept with women all the time. Neither of us could find answers as to how to keep sex as great as it was during the beginning of a relationship. Actually, let me correct that last statement. Looking back, it never even occurred to us to ask such questions. So we looked for cheap sexual excitement every chance we could.
Sexual boredom is a rampant problem in most monogamous relationships. Remaining faithful to one partner can often feel as if we are compromising, being forced to settle for less.
