B UNDLING
In this famous survey of premarital courting customs in early America, Stiles traces the origin, progress, and decline of bundling in America. He proves that bundling, a custom brought to America by the Puritans, was common at various times in many lands as far back as ancient Rome and that it arose out of real need rather than licentiousness. Controversial at the time, this book was banned in Boston when it was first published.
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THE KEGAN PAUL LIBRARY
OF SEXUAL LIFE
THE HISTORY OF THE ROD
William H. Cooper
PHALLIC WORSHIP
Robert Allen Campbell
SEXUAL LIFE IN ANCIENT EGYPT
Lise Manniche
SEXUAL LWE IN ANCIENT INDIA
J. J. Meyer
SEXUAL LIFE IN ANCIENT GREECE
Hans Licht
SEXUAL LIFE IN ANCIENT ROME
Otto Kiefler
BUNDLING
Henry Reed Stiles
THE SCENTED GARDEN
Bernhard Stern
SEX AND SEX WORSHIP
A. Wall
THE HISTORY OF CORPORAL PUNISHMENT
George Ryley Scott
AUTO-EROTICISM
Wilhelm Stekel
THER PERFUMEDG ARDEN OF SENSUAL DELIGHT
Muhammad Zbn Muhammad al-Nafzawi
B UNDLING
Its Origin, Progress and Decline in America
Henry Reed Stiles
First published in 2004 by
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TO
MY ESTEEMED FRIEND,
DACON JABEZ H. HAYDEN,
OF WINDORS LOCKS, CONNECTICUT
Whose jealous love of his native state, led him, in defense of her good fame, to make some strictures upon a statement relative to BUNDLING , in my H ISTORY AND GENEALOGIES OF ANCIENT WINDSOR, CONN ., which strictures (made and taken in the kindest spirit of personal friendship) set me upon the further investigation of this interesting subject ,
This Essay ,
The result of that investigation, and the justification (as I claim) of my original statement ,
IS
MOST RESPECTFULLY
DEDICATED
BY THE
AUTHOR
PREFATORY
IN the History and Genealogies of Ancient Windsor, Conn ., published in 1859, speaking of the influence of the old French wars upon the religious, moral and social life of New England, I used this language:
Then came war, and young New England brought from the long Canadian campaigns, stores of loose camp vices and recklessness, which soon flooded the land with immorality and infidelity. The church was neglected, drunkenness fearfully increased, and social life was sadly corrupted. Bundling that ridiculous and pernicious custom which prevailed among the young to a degree which we can scarcely creditsapped the fountain of morality and tarnished the escutcheons of thousands of families.
Hereupon there came a buzzing around my ears Divers good sons of Connecticut winced under the soft impeachment of having a bundling ancestry, and intimated that my sketch of society in the olden times was somewhat overdrawn. In 1861, an esteemed antiquarian friend in Connecticut wrote me as follows: Some of your friends feel that, in your History of Wind sor , you showed too much inclination to malign, or at least ridicule, Connecticut institutions, though I think none of them accuse you of malice in the matter, and they fear that this subject of bundling cannot be ventilated without endangering the fair fame of old Connecticut
Upon that hint I speak. Although born in the city of New York, I am the son of Connecticut parents, and proud to trace my descent through six generations of honest, hard-work-God-fearing Connecticut yeomanry. By the mere accident of birth I cannot feel myself absolved from that allegiance to the Wooden Nutmeg State, which is imposed upon me by the ties of ancestry, of relationship, of youthful associations, and last, not least, by the deep interest which I have taken in the history of one of its eldest-born towns. I am, indeed, at this day, to all intents and purposes, as wholly and truly a Connecticut man as if born within her borders; and as proud of her past, as hopeful of her future, and as jealous of her reputation as any one could desire. I trust, therefore, that I may be allowed to disclaim any inclination to malign, or at least ridicule Connecticut institutions, a task which, in my case, would savor of ingratitude, and which I should consider unworthy of my humble pen.
I cannot but think, also, that those who have found, or think that they have found, an inimical design in any pleasantries in which I may have indulged while describing the customs and manners of by-gone dayshave betrayed a thin-skinnedness , and an ignorance of the true glory of Connecticut history, when they imagine that her fair fame can be seriously tarnished by the fly-specks of certain customsat no time without their vigorous opponentsand long since rendered obsolete by the march of improvement.
The fun of the thing, however, is, that the sentence which has thus called forth the animadversions of the critics, will be found, with its context, on closer examination, to have applied to the New England Colonies , and not to Connecticut alone! In their haste to vindicate the land of steady habits, they seem to have assumed more than their share of the reproach involved in my simple historical statement.
As for myself, I am no believer in the theory that the objectionable portions of history should be kept in the background, and that only the bright side should be turned towards the world. If, as one has happily said, history is experience teaching by example, we most surely need to have both sides fairly presented to us, before we can properly extract therefrom the lesson of good or of evil which is therein taught. It is unnecessary to pursue the argument further. Suffice it to say, that perfection is as little to be expected in the history of a state or a community, as in the life of an individual. As to our ancestors, we must take them as history shows them to usmen of like passions with ourselves, and in all respects tempted as we are, yet neither worse, nor, again, very much purer or better than ourselves.
