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Cash Peters - Naked in Dangerous Places: The Chronicles of a Hungry, Scared, Lost, Homesick, but Otherwise Perfectly Happy Traveler

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Naked in Dangerous Places: The Chronicles of a Hungry, Scared, Lost, Homesick, but Otherwise Perfectly Happy Traveler: summary, description and annotation

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Finally, after years as a struggling radio host, Cash Peters has been given his own TV adventure show on a big-time travel network. The idea is simple: Lets dump him in an unfamiliar culture in a faraway land with no money and no place to stay, and see what happens. Unfortunately, there is one major problem: Cash doesnt want to go. Not only is he NOT the adventurous type, he is afraid of nearly everything and horribly allergic to the rest. Bottom line: theyve given the show to the wrong guy. Naked in Dangerous Places is the story of one mans efforts to remain sane in an insane world. Told with wit and shameless honesty, it documents a yearlong journey through exotic lands, from Kenya to Cambodia, Morocco to Dubai, as Cash drops in on fascinating cultures, eating, drinking, even sleeping in cow-dung huts with the locals, and eventually proving the truth of the old saying What doesnt kill you makes you stronger. Though, to be honest, killing you is more likely. From the Trade Paperback edition.Genre : TravelFormats : EPUB, MOBIQuality : 5

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PRAISE FOR NAKED IN DANGEROUS PLACES Great explorers possess bravery a - photo 1
PRAISE FOR
NAKED IN DANGEROUS PLACES

Great explorers possess bravery, a cast-iron stomach, and insatiable curiosity about what lies around the next bend. Cash Peters has none of these attributes. But he is very, very funny, and his misadventures in exotic locales make for the best travel writing I have read in years.

Peter Allison, author of Whatever You Do, Don't Run

Like most travelers, but too few travel writers, Cash Peters understands that nightmares are twice as entertaining as dreamsespecially when they come true. Peters's iconoclastic charm unaccountably fails to seduce South Seas cannibals and Hollywood producers, but proves a winner in this sharp-witted recap of two years in the company of such exotic and dangerous creatures. Someone should make a TV show out of it.

Chuck Thompson, author of Smile When You're Lying

It takes a clever new hook to grab and maintain my attention when it comes to travel writing. Naked in Dangerous Places is fascinating, funny, and endearing.

Doug Lansky, editor of There's No Toilet Paper
on the Road Less Traveled

Also by Cash Peters

Gullible's Travels:
The Adventures of a Bad Taste Tourist

For Ruth Contents Acknowledgments F irst let me thank the lovely people at - photo 2

For Ruth

Contents
Acknowledgments

F irst, let me thank the lovely people at Discovery for allowing this story to be told. That was pretty darned decent of them and I appreciate it. Unfortunately, it couldn't be the whole story If I told you the whole story, this wouldn't be a book, it would be a twelve-volume set and you'd never get it home on the bus. In order to squeeze in as much as I could, therefore, I tweaked the timeline a little, occasionally condensed recurring situations into one, and made a fraction of the characters composites of several real people I encountered during the making of the series. I didn't want to do this, and the individuals in question probably won't thank me for it, but remember, it was either burden you with a dozen unwieldy, expensive volumes you might never read, or the single, rather cute one you're holding right now. That said, none of this distorts the narrative too much. What follows is how things went down, pretty much.

Additional dollops of gratitude go out to my amazing agent, Betsy Amster; my lawyer, Dina Appleton; Brandi Bowles for championing the book at Crown; Adam Korn for his insightful edit; Heather Proulx for her insightful edit and voracious enthusiasm; Ronald H. Brower for his help with the Eskimo language stuff; the Lonely Planet guides and Wikipedia for doing what they do; plus Bill Margol, Len Richmond, David Austin, Terry Danuser, Ryan Ely, Lulu Baskins-Leva, Christine Richards, Sylvana Robinson, Sheril McCormack; the brilliant C. Dalaklis for his guidance (which I so foolishly ignored); the production people at the office; and the gifted and long-suffering crews who came out on the road with mein particular Michael Gatt for his wit and the steady education in kindness. But, above all, to Stanley for still being there when I finally returned home.

Shocking News T his is it Were going down A painful grinding sound from one - photo 3

Shocking News

T his is it. We're going down.

A painful grinding sound from one of the engines heralds a sharp drop in altitude. And painful grinding sounds of any kind on a plane are never good, right? I've seen documentaries. First comes the grinding, then you smell smoke. And from there it's all pretty straightforward: you crash.

With a violent shudder we tip suddenly to the left.

Yup, here it comes.

Bags somersault to the floor. Tasha, our field producer, is thrown forward, almost banging her head on the seat in front. My Gatorade is jolted from my fingers and skitters away, disappearing into the cockpit.

Mayday, Mayday!

That's me panicking, by the way, not the pilot. A trained professional, he's busy surveying the ground through a small triangular panel of Plexiglas to his left, no doubt trying to figure out how long it'll be before we hit something.

Immediately he sits up straight again.

Uh-oh! Not much farther now, then.

As I'm hanging on, mortified, five rods of brilliant sunlight burst through the starboard windows and sweep the tiny cabin from front to back like deep-sea divers searching a sunken wreck for bodies, something that could actually become a reality very shortly if we don't level our descent. Although, of course, you learn not to express such things out loud. For a start, it might annoy Eric, our field production coordinator. And you never want to do that. It was he who booked us on this bucking clockwork junk heap in the first place, following a minor altercation at check-in back in Australia over the staggering amount of equipment and other luggage we'd wanted to wheel aboard the aircraft, the combined weight of which was so preposterously excessive that, according to the waspish airline clerk, it would have negated every one of the laws of aerodynamics. (She probably had a good point. I have no idea how many laws there are, but let's say for the sake of argument fifteen. I mean, who in their right mind would choose to break all fifteen laws of aerodynamics? It's crazy.)

Okay Here's an idea, Eric argued, running a thin hand through his salt-and-pepper hair. What if we redistribute the equipment between the various cases? How about that?

Er you could, I suppose. But wouldn't Her brow corrugated into a frown. the total weight be exactly the same?

In a way.

Then no! No, you can't.

I saw his round shoulders quiver with suppressed rage.

Oh dear.

Sensing a small mutiny in the making, one of many this trip, I exchanged an uh-oh glance with Tasha, and distanced myself by flopping down on a suitcase, cracking open and letting the rest of them get on with it.

Letting other people get on with things is very much my way. I'm terribly hands-off as far as problems are concerned.

Look, darlin, Eric growled, hooking himself over the desk, here's the deal, okay? We're trying to make a television show Ooh, clever. Playing the glamour card. so what would it take to get us o?

But the poor woman had heard enough. Sir, please stand to one side. Youeverybody in this groupstand to one side and let the other passengers through. Next.

With great relief, the young couple behind us shuffled forward in line, tickets at the ready

What if

only to stop again with a groan. Eric wasn't budging.

Next!

we bought more seats for the bags?

Sir, the flight's full. If you like, we can put the excess on tomorrow's flight. That m

Nope, he cut her off, then sighed heavily. No, don't worry, it's fine. We'll go elsewhere. Turning his back: You're not the only major airline that goes to Vanuatu, you know.

This brought a smile to her face.

Well, actually, sir

Picture 4

The phone call that started it all came out of the blue.

Hi, is that Cash? a male voice said. Cordial, controlled. How's it going?

Great. Why who are you?

I'm the new vice president of development at ______

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