Corey Ann Haydu - Lawless Spaces

Lawless Spaces Corey Ann Haydu Corey Ann Haydu OCD Love StoryEver Cursed An imprint of Simon & Schuster Childrens Publishing Division 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, New York 10020 www.SimonandSchuster.com This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the authors imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Text 2022 by Corey Ann Haydu Jacket illustration 2022 by Emma Leonard Jacket design by Krista Vossen 2022 by Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved, including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. SIMON & SCHUSTER BOOKS FOR YOUNG READERS and related marks are trademarks of Simon & Schuster, Inc.

For information about special discounts for bulk purchases, please contact Simon & Schuster Special Sales at 1-866-506-1949 or . The Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau can bring authors to your live event. For more information or to book an event, contact the Simon & Schuster Speakers Bureau at 1-866-248-3049 or visit our website at www.simonspeakers.com. Interior design by Tom Daly Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Haydu, Corey Ann, author. Title: Lawless spaces / Corey Ann Haydu. | New York : Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, [2022] | Audience: Ages 14 up. | Audience: Grades 10-12. | Summary: While a highly publicized sexual assault case threatens to destroy her and her mother, sixteen-year-old Mimi Dovewick tries to understand their tense relationship by reaching out to the women of her maternal line through the journals they all kept. | Summary: While a highly publicized sexual assault case threatens to destroy her and her mother, sixteen-year-old Mimi Dovewick tries to understand their tense relationship by reaching out to the women of her maternal line through the journals they all kept.

Identifiers: LCCN 2021047141 | ISBN 9781534437067 (hardcover) | ISBN 9781534437074 (paperback) | ISBN 9781534437081 (ebook) Subjects: CYAC: Novels in verse. | Mothers and daughtersFiction. | Sexual abuseFiction. | DiariesFiction. | LCGFT: Novels in verse. Classification: LCC PZ7.5.H424 Law 2022 | DDC [Fic]dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2021047141 To Christine Blasey FordTo Anita HillTo everyone who bravely speaks upTo everyone who isnt able toTo us allandTo my pals at Southside Coffeewho in small and lovely waysthrough chitchat and lattes and scones and communityhelped me get through the pandemicand take care of a kidand write a bookId been trying to write for years. Dear Reader, Lawless Spaces includes material related to sexual trauma, sexual assault, sexual harassment, and generational trauma.

Please read with care, and step away if you need to protect your mental health. If you are in need of support, resources are listed in the back of this book. With love, Corey

A locker room is a lawless space, they say on the news. Mom and I are on our separate corners of the big brown couch the one that Eric brought three years ago when he moved in. It is the kind of leather that sticks to your thighs even in the cold of December, and makes you wonder if it is actually leather at all. It is a lot like Eric.

Uncomfortable and never quite fitting in to this house with its yellow flowered curtains and overstuffed armchairs. It is a little like me too right now not quite sure how I fit in here with them. Or anywhere with anyone. While we watch, Eric plays some card game on his phone at the kitchen counter, and I stitch a dress into a T-shirt, gathering and snipping thread and reimagining who I might be in it. The dress was too short, the kind of thing I wore before, but I miss the lace sleeves and the pale stripes and how soft it was on my skin. Always thinking youre some fashion designer, Eric mumbles from the other room like always.

Some famous insta-whatever girl. I look for Mom to correct him and tell him to shut up, or at least tell him that the dream isnt as ridiculous as his frowning mouth and rolling eyes seem to suggest. But. Mom is just watching the news. Walter Bruce wasnt just talking in a locker room, the lawyer with the short, neat haircut says. Walter Bruce was on his set and in his hotel rooms and in their trailers and in dark corners at parties.

And he wasnt just talking. He was assaulting Were talking today about the comments captured on tape, the evidence we have, the things he said that we have proof of. In the locker room, the reporter says. She is blonde; her mouth is tight. Mom keeps calling her a bitch, which doesnt seem very helpful at all. (this isnt quite exactly true because once she called me a bitch, but we are both trying to forget that day, we are both trying to forget a lot of days) Hey, isnt that the guy you did the movie with once? Eric says, wandering in from his spot in the kitchen, sitting between us. (this isnt quite exactly true because once she called me a bitch, but we are both trying to forget that day, we are both trying to forget a lot of days) Hey, isnt that the guy you did the movie with once? Eric says, wandering in from his spot in the kitchen, sitting between us.

His legs slide apart, his elbows find the tops of the cushions. I hate them there and everywhere. He shifts and its an earthquake and it makes my needle slip and poke my thumb. I gasp, but no one hears. I have been sewing my whole life outfits for dolls and stuffed rhinos and now outfits for me. And someday someday outfits for other people who cant decide if they want to stand out or blend in other people who like loud patterns all mixed together in ways that could seem wrong but that I make right.

Other people who want their dresses to be the main event and not ever whats underneath. I have been sewing my whole life, but still sometimes I poke myself with the needle or make the wrong stitch in the wrong place and Eric always notices, like he is adding up all the reasons I wont ever be special. Thats him, thats the guy, Eric says again and Mom shakes her head. Not as an answer I dont think more just a general no to it all. She was an actress once but not now and she doesnt like to talk about it, which he should certainly know. There is a long list of things Mom doesnt talk about.

And you believe a locker room is a lawless space, the lawyer on TV repeats, like she wants the anchorwoman to hear herself. So the things he said there, the way he spoke about those young girls, isnt anything to Its not illegal to call someone hot, the anchorwoman says with this smirk. Some of us even like it. My needle finds my thumb again. I want to turn the TV off. I dont want to hear those words in this living room with these people next to me.

I decide to add a turtleneck to the dress and another inch to the hem. Moms thighs unstick from the couch loudly, then re-stick. They unstick again louder. Oh my god, I hate that sound, I say to no one, really. Women have come forward, the lawyer says. Anonymous women, the anchorwoman says. Anonymous women, the anchorwoman says.

Like anonymous means fantastical; like it means paper-doll women made of cardboard. She is not much of an anchorwoman, really. I dont think journalists can look so smug or draw so much attention to their hotness. She is always wearing shirts that hug and dip and I know a lot about shirts that hug and dip and how careful you have to be about what people will think. (right now my shirt is lo ose but light which is also sort of bad because when your body is like mine and Moms and that reporters you are really mostly always a little bit bad) It is what it is, the reporter says. We cant police lawless spaces.